RECENT WATCHES: Addams Family Reunion (1999)

“Addams Family Values” is a beloved cult classic now but it was a box office disappointment in 1993. Combined with the tragic death of Raul Julia, any plans to produce a third film in the franchise were effectively scuttled. Yet the “Addams Family” brand name remained well known enough to have value. Saban Entertainment, rolling in dough after the phenomenal success of their “Power Rangers” franchise, purchased the rights to the characters with eyes towards launching a new television version. Before that came about, a direct-to-video film entitled “Addams Family Reunion” was produced essentially as an extended pilot. Though ultimately unrelated, save for Carel Struycken and Christopher Hart reprising their roles as Lurch and Thing, the film went out of its way to remind viewers of the Barry Sonnenfeld duo. Crapped out straight-to-video in 1998, “Reunion” has become especially reviled by “Addams Family” fans. 

The loose plot of “Addams Family Reunion” revolves around Gomez suddenly getting a desire to reach out to the extended Addams family. He pays for a costly service that arranges reunions for families. However, the creepy, kooky Addams are accidentally switched up with the Adams family, a mundane but despicable band of suburbanites. After tormenting Philip, the patriarch of the Adams brood that is slowly poisoning his rich father, Gomez and Morticia end up in prison while the kids are re-homed with some bratty WASPs. Otherwise, “Addams Family Reunion” is a loose series of gags involving a monstrous dog, Lurch making out with a woman in a pool, various sporting competitions, and two of the Adams ending up at the Addams home with Granny.

To put it simply, “Addams Family Reunion”  might be one of the most aggressively shrill and unpleasant movies I think I've ever seen. The jokes range exclusively from thuddingly obvious to shrieking. The movie begins with a painfully unfunny sequence of a postman being tormented by the Addams' mailbox and only goes downhill from there. There are multiple sequences of people screaming at a crocodile. When Lurch goes sleepwalking through the hotel, it results in repeated scenes of a scared woman screaming obnoxiously. Granmama chases the other Adams through the house while parodying “The Shining,” with more yelling. When not devolving into incoherent shrieking, “Reunion” focuses on the laziest switcharoo jokes possible. While the Sonnenfeld films spun gold out of the expected beat of the Addams interacting with quote-unquote normal people, “Reunion” hammers that same note in the least clever, most lazily executed and boring way possible.

“Addams Family Reunion” was directed by Dave Payne, a filmmaker who has mostly made low-budget horror movies. He claims he wanted to make a more darkly humorous film in-line with “Addams Family” tradition but that the studio demanded something strictly for kids. Yet even that doesn't explain why so much of this movie is so visually unappealing. The rich production design of the Sonnenfeld films have been traded for a very rinky-dinky looking Addams mansion, which is shot as flatly as possible. Most of the movie is set in a generic hotel, robbing the story of any spooky atmosphere. An especially dreadful moment is a pathetic attempt to recreate Gomez and Morticia dance scene from “Addams Family Values,” resulting in a horrible looking shot of Moritica spinning through the air. Worst yet is the puke-like CGI employed throughout. One of the film's worst running gags is a dog Fester has raised for Pugsley, that turns into a monster when hearing certain words. Far too many of the film's scenes are devoted to the ghastly CGI monster-chihuahua chasing and attacking people. It's maddening in its incompetence and lack of wit.

But a movie looking cheap and shitty and having terrible jokes would be one thing. What makes “Addams Family Reunion” truly despicable is how it treats the titular family as characters. The entire thematic point of the Addams Family is that, despite their rejection of traditional societal norms, they are fundamentally good people. The Addams here are all assholes. Gomez repeatedly humiliates Philip, in increasingly violent ways. To the point where his revenge, of sticking them in jail, feels totally justified. Thing and Fester's terrible dog terrorize people throughout the hotel for no reason. Wednesday and Pugsley get it worst of all. After being briefly adopted by the other family, it's heavily implied the kids tortured – if not murdered – their foster family. These gags, simultaneously too dark but not broad enough, represents a complete misunderstanding of the characters. Lastly, the film ends with Gomez abandoning his grandparents – who have come down with a condition that makes them “normal – at a nursing home, something the Addams simply would never do.

As awful as all of this is, there is some evidence to suggest “Addams Family Reunion” might have had a reason for existing. Replacing Raul Julia and Angelica Huston was never going to be easy but, on paper, Tim Curry and Daryl Hannah seemed like decent choices. To his credit, Curry does get the film's sole laugh, a reaction to being told he's made bail. Curry hams it up in his usual style but the material fails him. Hannah, meanwhile, is simply given nothing to work with and sleepwalks through the film. But they are better than the rest of the cast. Someone named Pat Thomas plays Uncle Fester and it's one of the most annoying performances I've ever seen. Thomas mugs furiously, giggling and shrieking and always making lots of noises. Nicole Fugere and Jerry Messing are both terrible as Wednesday and Pugsley, flat and far too mean. (Though it's awful that several mean-spirited gags are directed at Messing's weight.) 

Dave Payne does attempt to replicate Sonnenfeld's directorial style a few times, with a handful of tracking shots following various items tossed through the air. It does little to distinguish the film. I actually owned a VHS tape of “Addams Family Reunion” as a kid and watched it a few times. Proving once again that kids have a higher tolerance for obnoxious bullshit. Saban would produce a new (mediocre and subsequently forgotten) version of “The Addams Family” for Fox Family shortly after this film. The show recast everyone. Making me wonder what the point of creating this monstrosity was at all. Unless you're a devoted Ed Begley Jr. or Clint Howard fan, I would suggest only inflicting this movie on your worst enemies. [2/10]