Since at least the days of “Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman,” horror fans have always been fascinated by the question of which monster would win in a fight with some other monster. And being the two most iconic horror villains of the decade, fans debated for years over such a title bout between Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees. Hollywood producers realized the box office for that match-up could be enormous. In the early nineties, New Line Cinema gained the rights to Jason essentially for the expressed purpose of making “Freddy vs. Jason” a reality. Yet the crossover film would stagnate in Development Hell for over a decade, fans being tempted and frustrated by innumerable false starts. Finally, in 2003, the stars aligned and every eighties horror nerd's wet dream came true. The Sultan of Slash and the Dream Stalker faced off in a bloody battle to the death, a once-in-a-lifetime event for horror fanatics.
Part of why “Freddy vs. Jason's” pre-production process was so extended is because many of the scripts considered took bizarre deviations from established series lore. Say what you will about the final screenplay but it found a faithful, fairly logical way to blend these two characters. In the years since “Freddy's Dead” – which is only a few, since that film was technically set in the late nineties – Springwood has suppressed Freddy's memory by erasing his name from local history and doping any nightmare-prone kids up with dream-negating drugs. Freddy discovers Jason in Hel and manipulates him back to life, sending him to Ohio to reap terror and rewaken a fear of Krueger in the local populace. Naturally, Jason proves too hard to control and the slashers start fighting over the right to kill everyone. It's doubtlessly messy yet also works fairly smoothly without rewriting series history and does some neat new things with both characters.
Perhaps more important than anything else, “Freddy vs. Jason” respects both franchises. Jason is a great lumbering beast, who brutally and efficiently kills anyone that gets in his way. Yet there's also something kind of sad in his eyes, barely glimpsed behind that hockey mask. He loves his mama and was once just a scared little boy. The film earns a lot of points for exploring the psychology of the character. Freddy, meanwhile, is characterized here between the goofy prankster of the later films and his original, darker personality. He cracks some real groan-worthy one-liners and still enjoys goofing around in his nightmare realm. Yet the crossover repeatedly reminds viewers that Freddy killed (and probably molested) kids, by playing up his sexually menacing side. Robert Englund, naturally, excels as both a hilarious goof and a disturbingly sleazy pervert.
The most fun part of any wacky crossover like this is finding cool ways for the characters to compliment each other. Which “Freddy Vs. Jason” does repeatedly. This is most evident when Freddy enters Jason's mind. The resulting nightmare sees Jason spun through the air like a pinball and has Freddy exploiting the slasher's primal fear of water. The dreamy Camp Crystal Lake sequence that follows is worthwhile in its own right. While Jason doubtlessly reaps more carnage, including massacring a whole rave of teens, more of the movie's actual plot is based in “Elm Street” lore. Which is a good compromise. Weston Hill Sanatorium and Hypnocil reappear. Once again, the adults of Springwood are lying to their children and manipulating them. Freddy's nature as someone who plays with people's fears for his own amusement is maintained. We even get an awesome boiler room stalking sequence. Care was taken to ensure “Freddy vs. Jason” would follow both series as closely as possible.
Which isn't to say mistakes aren't made. Watching “Freddy Vs. Jason” sixteen years after it came out, the movie now looks as hilariously dated as its eighties predecessors do. The visual style is immediately recognizable as the early 2000s. This is most evident in the gratuitous slow motion peppered throughout. There's a cornfield rave sequence, which naturally features some hilarious slow-mo too. The fashion and slang of the teens stinks of my high school years. There's a then-relevant pop star in the cast and the actors all look like they are from MTV central casting circa last decade. Not to mention the shriek-y, nu-metal soundtrack.
Unlike the best of the “Nightmare” or “Friday the 13th” movies, you never care about any of the teens here. Monica Keena's performance as lead girl Lori is heavy on yelling and over-emoting but low on actual emotional investment. Most of her friends are a bland lot that are barely sketched out. The kids frequently get goofy, exposition-heavy dialogue that comes off as wholly unnatural. This causes many of the set-up scenes to drag quite a bit. The film murders a likable actress like Katherine Isabelle, grossly underserved anyway, but keeps the clearly uncomfortable Kelly Rowland around until nearly the end. The stereotypes sometimes emerge as more personable. Stoner Freeburg is kind of funny, especially in the bizarre “Freddy-pillar” sequence, while pathetic super nerd Linderman at least gets a noble death.
Not that the teens are horribly important anyway. We are here to watch Freddy and Jason rumble and the movie absolutely delivers on that. Ronny Yu, of “Bride of Chucky” and a number of clever Hong Kong action films, brings a frequently atmospheric and stylish approach to the visuals and a steady, furious hand to the action. The final showdown at Camp Crystal Lake is incredibly satisfying. Jason slams Freddy through windows, Freddy performs acrobatic stabs and flips. The environment is used in fun and clever ways. Compressed air canisters turn into missiles while a construction set adds even more variety to the fight. Most importantly, the gore level is impressively high. Freddy and Jason are slicing huge chunks out of each other by the end, tearing apart each other's bodies. It's pretty bitchin'. You can tell early on who will win and even the circumstance is easy to predict. But getting there sure is a thrill ride.
I was fifteen years old in 2003 and a huge fan of both franchises. In other words, I was right in the movie's demographic and, obviously, loved it. All the other dopey horror dorks that were my friends felt similarly. The gimmick was too great for audiences to ignore and the film became the biggest in the “Jason” series and the second highest-grossing in the “Freddy” series. New Line was eager to replicate “Freddy Vs. Jason's” success. (And a minor trend of other “versus” movies would follow.) The only sequel idea that seemed to gain much traction was “Freddy Vs. Jason Vs. Ash,” which proved too crazy a pipe dream to manifest on-screen. Ultimately, “Freddy Vs. Jason” would stand alone as a gloriously goofy but deeply entertaining one-off experience. I'm not sure it's an especially good movie but I can still have a very good time with this one. [7/10]
Anyone who knows their horror history knows that animals-run-amok films had their hay-day in the seventies. The decade featured rats, frogs, snakes, spiders, ants, cockroaches, bats, panthers, and dogs going on rampages against mankind. After the release of “Jaws,” suddenly every animal that swam in the sea was headlining its own horror picture. Director William Girdler previously ripped-off “The Exorcist,” with a blaxploitation version of that film called “Abby.” Seeing the blockbuster success of “Jaws,” Girdler clearly set his eyes on a new cinematic fad to take advantage of. “Grizzly” would follow the blueprint set out by Spielberg's masterpiece while starring one of the few animals that hadn't already starred in a seventies killer beast flick.
Filmed in Georgia, “Grizzly” is set in a national park presumably somewhere in the Pacific Northwest. The scenic location is an attraction for hikers, vacationers, and picnicking families. Chief park ranger Michael Kelly – whose team includes helicopter pilot Don and naturalist Arthur Scott – claim to have relocated all the bears in the forest. However, they pretty obviously missed one. A fifteen foot tall male grizzly bear has entered into the park and begins to brutally tear apart anyone it encounters. Soon, Kelly and his friends are being pressured to track down the bear and stop it before any more innocents die.
“Grizzly” isn't just attempting to ride the coattails of “Jaws” and other killer animal flicks. It is a nearly one-to-one rip-off of the shark movie. Like Sheriff Brody, Park Ranger Kelly is a regular joe authority figure determined to protect people, campaigning to close the park. The owner of the park, however, refuses to close it during the lucrative tourist season, even if it means people are going to get eaten by a bear. Sound familiar? The role of Quint is split between eccentric zoologist tough guy Scott and grizzled veteran Don. (Who has a Vietnam flashback that recalls Quint's Indianapolis speech.) After the attacks begin, the park is filled with hunters determined to bring down the bear, the same way Amity was flooded by shark-hunting fishermen. A helicopter stands in for the Orca and both get wrecked before the movies are over. Both films even feature a child being attacked by the menace, though the boy here just barely lives. The killer animal even blows up at the end of the both movies, the bear exploding hilariously thanks to a randomly applied bazooka.
Considering its rip-off status, “Grizzly” is most entertaining as a piece of camp. In another blatant emulation of Spielberg, Girdler fills his film with P.O.V. shots from the bear's perspective. However, Girdler's P.O.V. shots go on for so long, and are soundtracked to the bear's grunting noises, that they become funny. Many of the attack sequences are awkwardly framed. The fatal bear hugs involve actors being uncomfortably squeezed by a large fuzzy model. Another scene involves a woman being yanked up through a tent, which is badly framed. The bear is an unusually determined predator. He smashes his giant hairy paw through a wooden door and, in one hilarious sequence, slowly knocks over a park watchtower. The bear is also a rather polite wild killer, as he buries several of his victims after mauling them. The biggest laugh of the film comes when the bear suddenly, unexpectedly decapitates a horse. (Despite the copious gore, “Grizzly” was still rated PG.)
While the bear attack scenes in “Grizzly” are all hilarious, any non-bear attack sequence proves to be rather tedious. A subplot involves a potential romance forming between Park Ranger Kelly and a female photographer. However, this story line ends up going nowhere and is dropped half-way through the film. There are many long scenes devoted to our hero arguing about what he should do, the park operator always insisted that the Park Stays Open!!! Exploitation mainstay Christopher George stars and he is a compelling presence. However, even he can only do so much when forced to repeatedly march through such repetitive moments. Luckily, the movie is short and moves along quickly, so it's rare that too many scenes pass before the grizzly is ripping someone else a new asshole.
Despite – or perhaps because – it followed the “Jaws” formula so closely, “Grizzly” would become a considerable box office success. In fact, up until “Halloween,” it was the most successful independent film of the decade. “Grizzly” even spawned a rip-off of its own, in the form of 1977's “Claws.” In the early eighties, an attempt was made to make a sequel. “Grizzly II: The Concert” would've feature another giant grizzly bear attacking a new wave concert. Pre-fame Charlie Sheen and George Clooney had bit parts. Mid-way through production, the producer left with all the money and filming shut down. “Grizzly II” was never finished but bootlegs of the completed footage circulate around the usual corners. Quite a legacy for such a dumb, simple, but doubtlessly amusing little motion picture. [6/10]
Tales from the Cryptkeeper: Town Gathering
Here's a season three episode of “Tales from the Cryptkeeper” that sidelines the moral lesson a little bit and is stronger for it. In “Town Gathering,” Erin – who lives in a small town with her mom and grandfather – is constantly playing pranks on her family members. It's gotten to the point where nobody believes anything the girl says. Erin leaves her bike in the road, attracting the attention of Ben Arnold, an unscrupulous businessman who is being paid to locate a small town by a mysterious party. It's soon revealed that his employers are flesh-eating aliens looking for an obscure town to wipe off the map. And Erin just led him to the perfect candidate. Naturally, nobody believes her when she tries to tell them the truth.
“Town Gathering” acknowledges right from its early scenes that it's a variation on “The Boy Who Cried Wolf.” By foregrounding its moral lesson, it allows its story a little more breathing room. This episode is actually more preoccupied with telling its wacky little story, than constantly hitting the young viewer over the head with an obvious lesson. Ben Arnold is a compelling human villain. The aliens are nasty enough, with interesting designs that are both insect-like and reptilian. Erin is a likable protagonist. The end of the episode has a suitably ironic fate being delivered upon the bad guys, which is probably one of the more violent conclusions in this kid's cartoon. “Town Gathering” also features the sight of the Cryptkeeper dressed as a trucker. It is without a doubt one of the better season three episode, recalling the superior first season. [7/10]
Forever Knight: The Code
Here we go with another Schanke focused episode. (Which is unsurprising, considering John Kapelos wrote this one.) A chance meeting puts Schanke back in contact with his childhood best friend, Delehanty, who runs a hugely successful private security firm in Arizona. Fed up with the Canadian winters, Schank considers leaving the police force and joining his friend in a warmer climate. After the two seemingly crack a rash of poisonings, it seems to confirm Schanke's desire to leave. Nick, however, isn't so sure they've gotten to the bottom of this case. Meanwhile, he's also reminded of a time back in his wild west days when he trusted the wrong person.
The highlight of “The Code” is watching Kapelos bounce off of Joseph Ziegler, who plays Delehanty. The characters have a long history together and pepper their conversations with private in-jokes, which they do not feel the need to explain much. Which is amusing and accurately reflects what an old friendship is like. However, from the minute Delehanty appears on-screen, you know the guy is hiding something. Eventually, Schanke will be forced to make a hard decision regarding his friend. Another interesting element of the episode is that its case-of-the-week is obviously inspired by the infamous Tylenol tampering case. “Forever Knight” didn't do too many “ripped from the headline” episodes, so there's some novelty here. The flashback sequence are largely superfluous, though it is sort of fun to see Nick dressed up as a cowboy. [7/10]
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