When all the eighties horror characters were getting rebooted, a remake of “Child’s Play” was, of course, announced. However, due to MGM’s financial woes, it never went into production. That is until two years ago, when a revitalized MGM and Orion decided to fast-track a new “Child’s Play” remake. This would outrage horror fans but not just for the usual reasons. As I’m sure you know, the old school “Chucky” series is still running, the original creator and star still involved, with a television show and new sequel currently in development. A remake going forward without Don Manchini or Brad Dourif greatly annoyed fans. Instead, Lars Klevberg of the perpetually shelved “Polaroid” would direct with Mark Hamill voicing the new Chucky. (Since Universal owns all the sequels, no element from those could be utilized in this film.) Nevertheless, the new “Child’s Play” hit theaters this past summer, greeted by decent box office but very mixed critical reception.
2019’s “Child’s Play” follows the original’s story in the broadest way. Single mom/store clerk Karen lives in a Chicago apartment, with her lonely son Andy. For his birthday, she gets him the hot new toy: A red-headed doll in overalls named Chucky... Who soon turns murderous. Andy knows the truth but his sanity is questioned and he’s accused of the crimes. However, the new film otherwise updates the premise in the trendiest ways possible. Andy has been aged up to 11 and given a group of similar friends, in order to get that sweet “Stranger Things”/“It” money. Most pressingly, Chucky is no longer possessed by serial killer Charles Lee Ray. Instead, he’s a WiFi-enabled, A.I. driven high-tech toy called a Buddi – not a Good Guy Doll – who has his safety protocols removed by a disgruntled factory employee and slowly becomes mad and murderous.
What is simultaneously most interesting and most blasphemous about 2019’s “Child’s Play” is its radically different Chucky. By writing out sadistic, perverted, oddly charismatic Charles Lee Ray, the remake creates a more sympathetic and even pathetic Chucky. 2019’s Chucky truly wants to be a good toy, a real friend to Andy. But he’s glitchy and a little too much of a kiddie toy for this older, edgier boy. Eventually, the lonely kid does bond with the robotic doll. However, as he makes real friends, Chucky is increasingly rejected and forced to perform crude pranks. His murders are ultimately twisted attempts to regain Andy’s favor and a reflection of the toy’s lack of morality. Which, in a Frankensteinian touch, is no fault of his own. When Andy is forced to take Chucky apart, or when the doll is shoved in a closest, he becomes a sad, abused creature. You can’t help but feel bad for this Chucky, a dejected plaything discarded the minute he’s no longer amusing, killing because he just wants to be loved. An interpretation furthered by Mark Hamill’s child-like performance, speaking the whole time in his “Brigsby Bear” voice, I’m not shocked some fans hated this almost-in-name-only depiction.
An uncertain tone isn’t the only sign this script might’ve been a bit rushed. There’s a general lack of logic here. The movie is ambiguously set around Christmas. Outside lights are being taken down in one scene but, in a later scenes, there’s a Black Friday-like shopping spree. Andy’s friends are more obnoxious than endearing and one of them just carries around a huge chainsaw, which nobody seems to think is weird. Andy is partially deaf now, with a hearing aide, a story element that never amounts to much. The truth is this new Chucky is too damn creepy, intentionally inhabiting the Uncanny Valley, to ever be believable as an actual product. How much Karen loves her son or simply tolerates his eccentricities is never made clear. Aubrey Plaza’s typically snarky performance doesn’t help the audience decide what’s going on here. And then, of course, the movie has to throw in horror cliches like jump scares or an undying murderer coming back for one more shock.
Which of the Universal Monster stars had the saddest end to their careers? Karloff's failing health left him wheelchair bound, dependent on oxygen tanks, and with his final few credits in some Mexican cheapies... But he also had “Targets,” so it wasn't all bad. Lugosi's morphine addiction left him washed-up before he ended his career with Edward J. Wood. But those movies, regardless of their quality, are cult classics now. So how about Lon Chaney Jr.? Chaney would transition from a horror star to a decent character actor. As the fifties became the sixties, his increased dependence on alcohol left him starring in movies like “Hillbillys in a Haunted House” and “Face of the Screaming Werewolf.” By the time he shot his final credit in “Frankenstein vs. Dracula,” he was so crippled by throat cancer that he couldn't even talk. (But even then, he had a “Spider Baby” every once in a while.) A film very typical of this portion of Chaney's career is 1956's “Indestructible Man.”
Bank robber and brutal killer Charles “Butcher” Benton awaits execution. Even as his time of death approaches, Benton refuses to reveal the location of his hidden cache of money to his crooked lawyer. Only Benton's ex-girlfriend, a dancer in a burlesque club, knows the location of the money. After “Butcher” is executed, his body is sold to an unscrupulous scientist. The doctor accidentally revives Benton, giving him bulletproof skin and super strength but leaving him mute. Now an undead super-killer, Benton goes on a rampage, seeking revenge on those that betrayed him and looking to retrieve his secret stash. Police detective Dick Chasen is on his trail and also begins to romance Benton's old girlfriend.
“Indestructible Man” bares a superficial resemblance to Chaney Jr.'s earlier shocker, “Man-Made Monster.” In both, a mad scientist uses electricity to turn Chaney into a silent killer. While “Man-Made Monster” was a straight-up vintage monster movie, “Indestructible Man” is more of a crime movie with sci-fi and horror elements. Once Chaney is resurrected, the mad scientists are literally tossed aside and never mentioned again. The gothic castles are traded out for the streets of L.A., which is among the film's more interesting aspects. Though he's technically one of the undead now, Chaney's Benton still acts like a common thug, most interested in petty revenge and getting his cash back. The detective element – following leads, hunting down witnesses, foot chases across urban streets – are extremely prominent. This often feels like it was written as a crime movie first, with the horror stuff added in later to make it more marketable.
The above description, sadly, makes “Indestructible Man” sound more interesting than it actually is. This movie is pretty dull. The investigation scenes drag horribly. The plot never becomes especially involving. Director Jack Pollexfen – largely a B-movie writer who was a co-director on his other two credits – has a very flat visual style. Worst yet, Dick Chasen narrates large stretches of the film. The very droll voice-over plays over about half of the film. What makes this really annoying is that the narration is often just describing what's happening on-screen. Apparently, this was done in order to invoke “Dragnet” but Max Showalter – better known as “Sixteen Candles'” Grandpa Fred and credited here as Casey Addams – is no Jack Webb.
Which leaves us with Lon Chaney. Even in a weaker film like this, Chaney has his moments. He begins the movie by delivering a vicious monologue to his crooked lawyer. Lon really bites into the delivery of “rotten stinking mouthpiece.” This, it turns out, is Chaney's only dialogue in the film, as he's rendered mute post-resurrection. Yet Chaney still acts his heart out with his sad sack face and hound dog eyes, suggesting a much more tragic, introspective inner life for this character. It's also surprising that “Butcher” Benton's rampage is so brutal. Chaney is choking people out, throwing them to the ground, tossing victims off buildings, and generally brawling his heart out. There is a certain novelty to that.
“Indestructible Man” is another public domain title, which means you can find it anywhere online and in any number of cheapie box sets. So at least you shouldn't have to pay for it if you do want to see it. The film was also featured on “Mystery Science Theater 3000,” which sounds about right. If you want to see a movie where Lon Chaney Jr. survives the electric chair and starts killing people afterwards, watch “Man-Made Monster.” Despite one or two interesting ideas, “Indestructible Man” is mostly a snooze-fest. [5/10]
Tales from the Cryptkeeper: The Avenging Phantom / Myth Conceptions
The third episode of “Tales from the Cryptkeeper: Season Two” is another two-fer. The first story, “The Avenging Phantom,” concerns a fearful young boy who is bullied by everyone around him. His sister picks on him for sleeping with a nightlight. The old lady he collects bottles for short-changes him. He's chased by a stray dog and bullied by a local bully named “Smash.” The boy wishes for the Avenging Phantom, a comic book superhero, to punish the people who torment him. That's exactly what he gets but it turns out the shadowy Phantom doesn't want to stop once it's started.
“The Avenging Phantom” comes close to getting at something kind of profound, as far as kid cartoons go. Our protagonist soon discovers that seeking revenge can only lead to more pain. However, the episode then spins this into a much lamer moral, about him finding the courage to sleep without a nightlight. However, the segment where the shadowy Avenger enters his room and begins to whisper threats at him is probably as creepy as “Tales from the Cryptkeeper” would be allowed to get.
The second story in the episode also has its spooky moments. “Myth Conceptions” follows a money-hungry archaeologist trying to dig up Medusa's temple in Greece. However, he's not after the artifacts for their historical value. Instead, he hopes to find Perseus' golden shield and make himself rich. While digging, he gets into an argument with a local girl. He then digs himself into Medusa's underground temple, the tunnels long and winding like a snake, and finds himself stalked by the legendary monster.
Honestly, if it had a little more gore and nudity, “Myth Conceptions” probably could've worked as an actual episode of “Tales from the Crypt.” As in the original series, it follows an amoral asshole who is motivated only by a petty emotion who then gets his ironic comeuppance via a gooey monster. The twist ending involving Medusa's true identity is easy enough to guess but it's still a decently downbeat reveal to end the episode on. The sequence of the asshole archaeologist being pursued by Medusa through the shadowy tunnels is even mildly suspenseful. Most refreshingly, there's no heavy handed moral here. Just the idea that those who are greedy and don't heed warnings will get what's coming to them. John Kassir then takes us out with some quality cheese puns. If it wasn't for some overly broad slapstick involving the Vault Keeper at the very beginning, this would really be a stand-out episode. [7/10]
Forever Knight: Stranger Than Fiction
Here's a good one. Emily Weiss is the author of a hugely popular series of vampire novels, the latest of which is called “The Denied.” It would seem she has an obsessed fan, who thinks himself to be a vampire... Or, as Nick fears, may be an actual vampire. See, Weiss' novels are shocking close to fact and that is making the local vampire community edgy. Nick and Schanke are tasked with protecting Weiss and both get shocked into her fantasy world, Weiss developing feeling for Nick. Meanwhile, LaCroix continues to taunt Nick from the shadows, always urging him to give into his bloodsucking desires.
Instead of the usual flashback structure, “Stranger Than Fiction” does something a little more fun. It depicts sequences from Emily's books, with the show's cast members playing the various characters. So we see Nick, Natalie, and even Schanke's version of the novel, the last of which is pretty amusing. This is like the third time Nick has fallen in love with a witness he's suppose to protect, but it is compelling this time. Geraint Wyn Davies and guest star Larissa Laskin have really nice chemistry together. Though the resolution to the stalker story is a total shrug, it leads into a confrontation with LaCroix, which is very juicy. I wish this wasn't the second episode in a row where Nick uses his vampire hypnotism to make someone forget something but it's over all a strong episode, which touches upon some of the reason why literary fantasy worlds appeal to so much. [7/10]
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