OSCARS 2026 LIVE BLOG!

6:50 - Welcome again to Film Thoughts' annual live blog of the Oscars ceremony!

Much to my eternal shame, I have not seen all the nominees this year. I fell short by one, not having time to squeeze in The Lost Bus. Hopefully that doesn't take away from my enjoyment of the show tonight.

Having said that, this is still what I would vote for in each category, if I was an Academy member. 

6:55 - I wonder if Conan is going to make any awkward jokes about actually being in a nominated movie this year? Honestly, I hope he does more acting. 

7:02 - Hopefully this will be the only Aunt Gladys related gag tonight. 

7:03 - Okay, excellent dummy joke. And alright, Conan as a CGI cartoon character is pretty funny. 

7:05 - That bit went on a little too long but I enjoyed it. 

7:07 - See, one of the great things with Conan is, even when he tells a lame joke, he can turn it around with a silly delivery. 

7:08 - Me and the missus have been cracking jokes about how much our brain sees the word bologna whenever we see the word "Bugonia." 

7:10 - I would go see "CAPS LOCK"

7:12 - See, this is why Conan is a class act. There's not a joke about how nobody watches the Doc Shorts, the humor goes in a totally different direction. "Little Sad!" Except the donkey one. 

7:14 - What was with that split second shot of the camera shaking? Wow, the joke writers at the Oscars are still doing "TFW" jokes. 

7:17 - Fifteen minutes into his Oscars hosting gig, Conan O'Brien actually did get serious. 

7:19 - Okay, Conan's fake Oscar being delivered by a falcon was funny.

7:20 - It would seem like Amy Madigan is the favorite to win though Fanning would be a nice surprise. 

7:22 - Yay, for horror representation at the Oscars! She is accepting the award in front of the foyer of a Chinese restaurant. 

7:24 - "Thanks to all the dogs!" Awww, I like that. 

7:30 - I thought they were going to a comment section joke but this is okay too.

7:31 - Will Arnet has been hitting that bronzer. 

7:33 - Let me reiterate once again that I am a registered "KPOp Demon Hunters" hater. But the odds of "Little Amelie" pulling off an upset wasn't great. 

7:35 - The first unsuccessful play-off attempt of the night. I'm rooting for "Retirement Plan."

7:36 - I guess if we are going by the measurement of the Academy awarding the Most and not the Best than I guess "The Girl Who Cried Pearls" makes since in this category. Definitely had the most visually elaborate animation.

7:38 - I thought we were going to commercial but here's a musical number instead. 

7:40 - I like the swag the banjo lady here has. 

7:41 - Well, this was an honest attempt to re-create one of the best moments from a film last year and, uh, they tried. 

7:48 - Kylie Jenner's embarrassed smirk during the Bum Drum bit was amusing. Also, "Lawnmower Man" clip at the Oscars! Boy, they are still rolling with the Bum Drum thing, aren't they? 

7:51 - Anne Hathaway should do comedy more often. I was hoping "Frankenstein" would win Best Costumes just for that dress Mia Goth wore in the flashbacks. 

7:53 - Did her mic cut out for a second or did she say something really offensive? 

7:54 - I was rooting for "The Ugly Stepsister" but "Frankenstein" probably did have the best make-up, so I'm fine with this.

7:56 - Just wouldn't be an Oscar ceremony without as many awkward play-offs as possible! 

8:00 - So I've been saying Paul Mescal's name wrong the whole time. 

8:03 - The joys of live television, cutting to Delroy Lindo while someone else is still talking. 

8:06 - The P.T.A. Witness Protection was a good joke. "And I have one before you!" 

8:12 - Matt Berry shouting out Basil Rathbone, you love to see it. 

8:13 - There's definitely some Greek tragedy to Kamial Nanjami completely fucking up his face and body to get the superhero bod for a franchise that never panned out. 

8:15 - I want to reiterate how stunted I was that this year's Live Action shorts were mostly not depressing!

Okay, a tie in Live Action Shorts? That's never happened before. Hopefully, "The Singers" tied with "Friends of Dorothy" or "Jane Austen's Period Drama." 

8:17 - I wasn't crazy about "Two People Exchanging Saliva" but the filmmaker is actually in the Oscars Death Race Discord server I'm in and gave us a few shout-outs, so it's neat that they won. 

8:18 - Boy, the joys of live television are really showing up tonight. That abrupt cut to Conan on the side of the stage was an extraordinary moment. 

8:20 - Best Supporting Actor doesn't seem to have a clear cut front runner, so we'll see how this goes. I'm rooting for Delroy. 

8:22 - Sean Penn's biceps didn't want to be here. 

8:28 - Conan's white tux, that's a real humdinger. They are doing a few too many bits tonight though. 

8:32 - Robert Downey Jr. wore his Doctor Doom suit to the show tonight. 

It's actually insane that this is the first Oscar Paul Thomas Anderson has won. 

8:38 - Damn, the bits have mostly been very bad tonight. All the pithy banter in the world could not sell this one. Hopefully this will not be Ryan Coogler's only time on-stage tonight. 

8:44 - Mel Brooks burying both Carl and Rob Reiner just wasn't right.

8:46 - Probably for the best that they cut off Billy Crystal reading off Reiner's films at "The American President." 

8:48 - Someone standing up right in the way of the camera as the In Memorium montage starts. The technical gaffs tonight have been frequent. 

8:49 - I'm glad Udo Kier didn't get left out of the montage. 

8:54 - Also glad they didn't leave out Cary-Hirouki Tagawa, my boy Shang-Tsung.

8:55 - Boy, whoever is responsible for the microphones and sound tonight should probably not get brought back to this job next year. 

8:59 - Did they just cut to commercial in the middle of Babs finishing a sentence? Tonight's show feels like it's dragging on. 

9:02 - Wow, I'm impressed it took them this long to slip a zoomer/6-7 joke in there.

9:04 - ABC/Disney getting that cross-brand synergy in there with a Grogu. What is with the timing being so severely off tonight? 

 

9:06 - Shout-out to "The Lost Bus," the movie that fucked up my Oscar Death Race this year. Curse you, Paul Greengrass!

9:10 - "Do the hand thing, baby! 

9:14 - Oh no, I dozed off for a minute, woke up, and Jimmy Kimmel was hosting the show. I must be in a nightmare. 

9:16 - Man, I was really rooting for "The Devil is Busy." "All the Empty Rooms" does seem to be a little like the Academy's speed.

9:19 - Aside from it just being my favorite of the noms, it would be neat if Tig Nitaro won an Oscar. And again, inexplicably, the anti-Putin doc wins. I hate the guy too but the Academy really fuckin' hates that guy. Kimmel cracking jokes about the Melania doc, when it would not be eligible for the show this year, Jimmy! Sloppy. 

9:28 - I still have never seen "Bridemaids." What the hell is up with the sound tonight?

9:30 - "This bit has been going on a little too long." That describes all the bits tonight.

9:32 - "Sinners" obviously had the best score but "Bugonia" would be an acceptable alternative for me.

Also acceptable for them to just give it to the best score.

9:34 - Jesus Christ, what are these bits?????

9:36 - Not exactly passionate about it but "F1" was my pick for Best Sound, so that's nice. 

9:38 - I thought they were going to say "Welcome the President of the United States of America" and uhhhhh that would be awkward. 

9:43 - Woo doggy, this might not be the most boring Oscars broadcast I've ever seen but it's definitely not one of the better ones. 

9:46 - Is everybody being held at gunpoint while they read off these bits? Jesus. Also, not to be rude but Bill Pullman is looking weeeeeird. 

9:49 - Matt Berry pronounces "Demi Moore" exactly the way I would expect him too. And Miss More is wearing a giant feather duster tonight.

It's got no chance at winning but I'm rooting for "Train Dreams." '

9:50 - "Sinners" had great cinematography though, so I can't complain about that. 

9:55 - Ya know, man, I just don't get it. What about "Golden" makes it better than every other K-pop song out there? Just not my genre, I guess. 

9:57 - "Scan the QR code on your screen" ORRRRR you just put all the performances in the broadcast, you fuckin' hacks. 

10:03 - Javier, I knew you were based. 

10:04 - I figured "Sentimental Value" would win International Picture. Out of a lot that I wasn't crazy about, I suppose "The Voice of Hind Rajab" was my top pick. 

10:08 - Oh Lionel Richie, I didn't think you ever went away!

10:09 - There is a part of me that thinks it would be hilarious if Diane Warren actually does win this time. 

10:10 - The fans of this movie are about to get even more annoying now. 

10:12 - "I would like to thank.." BLARRPBRRRAPPP!!!! That made me laugh harder than any of the actual jokes tonight. 

10:15 - Doesn't matter how many years go by, anytime I hear someone say "Zendaya," my brain mentally fills it in to "...is Meechee."

Anyway, Coogler gang, rise up. 

10:17 - I love Paul Thomas Anderson but he should've won this award long before this for much more worthy films. When was the last time he had a coke night with Tarantino, I wonder?

10:20 - Ethan Hawke does deserve the Best Comb-Over Award. Will Timmy Shallot get or MBJ? Let's see. 

Michael B. was my pick from the get-go so I'm glad he turned out victorious. 

10:23 - Delroy Lindo definitely has the best ascot tonight. 

10:26 - Adrien Brody doing a Turbo Tax commercial is a good reminder that, in-between his two Oscar wins, he was starring in shit like "Giallo" and "InAPPropriate Humor." 

10:28 - Even Conan is like, "Jesus, can we please get this over with?" 

10:29 - Buckley feels like the only person in this category with real heat. Nice peroformance. Byrne would be a nice surprise. 

10:31 - I like Buckley's accent. "the arRRRRt."

10:33 - One more category, let's get this oveeeeeer with. 

10:34 - I kind of like how friggin' tall Nicole Kidman looks. 

10:36 - Well, there you, nobody how close it begins, the Academy will not nominated a horror film unless they can trick everyone into thinking it's a "psychological thriller."

10:38 - The cat, the most important thing in the room.

10:39 - I really loved Conan's hosting gig last year but this ceremony suuuucked. Too awkward to be serviceable, too boring to be memorable and entertaining. Few inspiring wins. Is that it? Are we done? Hot damn. Let's go to bed. Love you guys! 

Oh wait, there's more. 

10:40 - Ooooh this is an unfunny "One Battle After Another" bit! 

Good night, everybody!

OSCARS 2025 LIVE BLOG!

6:53 - Hello and welcome back to Film Thoughts' annual live-blog of the Oscars ceremony! I'm a little late starting this because I had to choke down some pizza. This is the climax of a full month and a half of me watching and reviewing my way through all the nominees, so it's been quite a journey, I guess. I don't know how many years I've been doing this and I'm sure two people are reading these words right now. Nevertheless, I love giving a minute-by-minute reaction to the glitziest night in Hollywood. Conan O'Brien is a good pick for host, I hope he delivers!

Here's who I would vote for in every category, if the Academy ever gets with it and make me a member.

7:02 - And off we go with the first of what will surely be many heart-touching montages.

7:03 - I'm going to come out being an asshole first thing this year by admitting that I don't especially like Ariana Grande's style of singing! She is overdoing it so badly right now. 

7:05 - Enrivo's nails are certainly making a statement.

7:06 - How much of the ceremony tonight is going to bank on a pre-established fondness for "Wicked?" Cause if it's a lot then.. Gonna be a rough night.

7:08 - By the way, it is sort of fun going into the Oscars genuinely having no idea what will win best picture. Let's see the Academy completely blindside everyone and hand it to "Nickel Boys," just for funzies. 

7:09 - Alright, the cut to "The Substance" made me laugh. This is a pretty good bit! Are we to expect more bizarre skits like this? Hope so.

7:12 - I like the way Conan pronounces "Nosferatu." 

7:13 - Lots of jokes incoming tonight about "The Brutalist's" runtime? 

7:15 - Is, uh, Karla in attendance tonight? Can't blame them for going with the easy punchline with her. I do think I've laughed more during this opening monologue than I have in the last few ceremonies. 

7:17 - Gotta give Timothee some credit: He pulls off the yellow tux. 

7:18 - I love the sparse, uncomfortable chuckles after he made mentioned about how a man unable to give his wife an orgasm. Don't even get me started on Amazon buying the Bond rights...

7:20 - The withering stare of John Lithgow is very effective. 

7:21 - Damn, Guy Pearce had a rockin' mullet. 

7:22 - Adam Sandler's fluffy sweatshirt rubbed up against his mic there. He's having fun, I respect that.

7:25 - Conan getting serious 25 minutes into his set. But I appreciate what he's saying here. See, that really is what the Oscars are all about. Celebrating the little guys! That's why you don't cut the Shorts categories from the boardcast! 

7:26 - This bit isn't very good. The audience is hating it, lol. But I do have to admire the audacity and stupidity of this. Especially the piano playing sand worm! 

7:28 - RDJ stopping by at the Oscars on his way to collecting another ten million from Marvel. 

7:29 - In a year that didn't have stand-out performances like Culkin or Strong or Pearce, I would agree with the estimation that Edward Norton should just get an Oscar at this point. But "A Complete Unknown" is such an nothing movie and it's such a bland performance. Come on, Kiernan, get that gold!

7:31 - Been a fan of this guy since "Igby Goes Down," so it's nice to see him winning. The sound just cut out on the Hulu feed. How many siblings does he have? 

7:33 - Maybe acceptance speeches should have more rambling anecdotes like this. 

7:38 - Andrew Garfield's brown suit is bitchin'. 

7:40 - Awwww, aren't these two cute together? I'm really rootin' for "Flow."

7:41 - Hoo-ray! May we have more winners from Latvia in the future! 

7:43 - I'm rooting for "Magic Candies" but one of the lamer ones will probably get it. As long as it's not "Beautiful Men." 

Not surprised that the most Serious, definitely not the best, of the nominees won though.

7:46 - Seeing these two bicker over their cellphone was amusing. 

7:54 - Honestly, I'd probably vote for "Conclave," if it was me. But I'm still hoping for a Sweepferatu. But "Wicked" had the Most Costume Design, so it'll be deemed the Best Costume Design.

7:57 - Oops, passed the camera over to Bowen by accident for a minute. I'm really appreciating the general tone of the ceremony this year, of paying tribute to all the artisans in the industry. 

8:00 - "Conclave" Bros, it's not too late. We can still make this happen!

8:05 - I love Conan's commitment to stupid bits. I'm glad Nick Offerman's resounding voice has paid off for him. 

8:07 - The opposite of joy: Screenwriting! Now I'm curious who would win Best Hair...

8:09 - People on Twitter have been extremely normal about Sean Baker all week, so I'm sure they are overjoyed with it winning anything. 

8:12 - Desperately hoping we have a complete "Emilia Perez" lock-out tonight. Can "Nickel Boys" pull it off? 

8:13 - "Conclave," huh? Probably wouldn't have been my first choice but I'll take it. 

8:15 - Time for the yearly tradition of Janet Yang appearing on-screen.

8:20 - Hell yeah, let's keep Conan changing tuxes all throughout the night!

8:21 - June Squib supremacy! "The Substance" will get it and probably deserves it but "Sweepsferatu!" Alas.

8:24 - I like the little green flowers on this lady's jacket.

8:25 - "I had the pleasure of working with them on the worst Bond movie ever." This tribute was real weirdly timed, in light of the Amazon news. Also, I love the way Halle's dress keeps reflecting the light back at the camera. 

8:27 - Margaret Qualty's tooth-gap? I'm just sayin', it DOES things to a man. 

8:28 - Okay.. "Lisa." 

8:30 - Hey, Doja Cat can actually belt it out! Boy, this is going on for a while, isn't it? I don't know who this person is and I don't know why they invited her. Her hand motions are distracting me. 

8:37 - Conan has been killing it tonight. A building devoted to streaming movies! What a concept!

8:39 - "The world's sexiest Daryl." Jesus, twenty years since "Kill Bill Vol. 2?" I am crumbling into dust.

8:40 - Really gotta give Editing to "The Brutalist," right? 

Okay, "Anora" for Editing. Huh. That's a choice, I guess. How many more times is Sean Baker going to be up on stage tonight? 

8:43 - Seems like a little bit of a long shot but I'm hoping Isabella Rosalleni wins Best Supporting Actress. Come on, she wore blue velvet to the show tonight! 

8:45 - Category fraud! Saldana was clearly the lead of "Emilia Perez!" Also, that movie sucked! 

8:47 - Oh my god, this is a very intense acceptance speech! Maybe don't ladle it on so much, Zoe, jeez.

8:53 - "The Substance:" The first movie with an extended homage to "Re-Animator" to be nominated for Best Picture?

8:54 - We need to get Ben Stiller out there, doing bits again. He's been behind the camera too much. "Sweepsferatu!" Come on!

8:56 - Uggggh, "Wicked" is just going to bulldoze the technical categories, isn't it? Booooo!

8:58 - "Please welcome, Mick Jagger!" Okay, I don't know why he's here but why not? His eyes have gotten squintier over the decades. 

8:59 - I'm sure they'll give it to "Emilia Perez" but can we just give it to Diane Warren, so we don't have to think about her again next year?

9:01 - Best Original Song is a pretty weak category this year but "Like a Bird" is probably the actual best of the nominees. 

9:03 - Can we make sure that "Emilia Perez" wins for nothing else tonight? 

9:05 - Singing your acceptance speech is a nice touch, I'll admit. But fuck that movie! 

9:08 - Damn, Drake is so washed that he's getting dragged at the fucking Oscars! 

9:09 - I love the commitment they are showing to this stupid-ass Sandworm bit. "Samuel L. Jackson and Selena Gomez team up in what will hopefully be next summer's wackiest buddy comedy!"

9:10 - "Incident" probably won't win but I sincerely hope it does. 

9:11 - Lots of powerful filmmaking on display in the Best Documentary Short category this year and the Academy gave the Oscar to the thing that was on fuckin' Netflix. 

9:13 - Personally rooting for "Black Box Diaries" but it'll probably go to "No Other Land." 

Yep. I had read online that Gal Gadot was going to present this category but looks like someone changed their mind. I WONDER WHY????

9:16 - I can't help but be cynical about these things. I don't think giving a film about the topic of Gaza being destroyed and suppressed by Israel helps the people actually under that regime much. Good movie though. Donate money to Palestine instead. I no longer believe that simply watching a movie about a topic counts as activism. 

9:22 - The wild fires are still on-going, yes? Sort of crazy that the news cycle just moved on from that. Ralph Fiennes does not look like he wants to be here. 

9:24 - The show has been kind of middle-of-the-road tonight but Conan is such a natural pick for host. Most consistently funny ceremony in years!

9:26 - "Kilometers and Kilometery!" A writer wrote that joke. 

9:29 - I'm very blase on the "Dune" movies but, I'll admit, I probably would've voted for them in Best Sound too. They straight-up turned that last guy's mic off! Rude.

I've never heard a single person pronounce Gal Gadot's name the same way. 

9:30 - Come on, APES!

NO! Let the apes take the stage and steal the Oscar anyway! Chimp solidarity! APES TOGETHER STRONG. 

9:32 - The German starts talking and then they play da music to get him off da stage. "A legendary movie duo reunite!" I'm so glad that Clint and Clyde are getting back together after all these years...

9:37 - They got Sterling K. Brown to partner with Ana de Armas because Daniel Craig won't return their calls anymore. 

As always, Best Live Action Short is a super weak category. "The Man Who Could Not Remain Silent" is my pick. 

9:38 - "I Am Not a Robot" was solid. Surprised to see the Shorts branch award the one nominee that wasn't a heavy-handed issues movie!

9:39 - "But I love you." And they start to play them off. NO DUTCH AFFECTION AT THE OSCARS!

9:41 - Nothing but complete respect for Gene Hackman for living to 95 and still dying in a mysterious fashion. In all seriousness, an icon. Time to get sad. I'm glad Roger Corman made it into the broadcast montage. 

9:43 - Cheng Pei-Pie died??? 

9:44 - Lou Gossett Jr., one of my all-time favorite "That Guys!" Sad he won't be randomly popping up in stuff anymore. Shelley Duvall, you are missed! And the loss of David Lynch leaves a hole in my heart the size of a small town with a dark secret. 

9:50 - Did that non-controversy about A.I. really one-shot "The Brutalist's" chances in every category? Pretty bogus, says I. Let's give Lol some love at the very least! 

9:52 - "Maria's" cinematographer has THE DRIP. That fedora, the side burns, the turned-up collar? Dude looks like a Batman villain.

9:54 - COME ON, SWEEPSFERATU! GIVE ME SOMETHING!

Alright, also an acceptable choice. 

9:57 - Absolutely zero chance for "The Girl with the Needle" to win Best International Feature but it's a movie I like the more I think about it. Please, not "Emilia Perez!" 

9:59 - All I care about is that "Emilia Perez" did not win. "I'm Still Here," a totally cromulent motion picture. Kind of mean to play that guy off when he was being very sincere! 

10:05 - Absolutely brutal shade on the current administration there, Mr. O'Brien. 

10:06 - Oh hi, Mark Hamill. 

Once I saw the movie, "The Brutalist" score totally won me over. I hope it wins, not the least because it's competition is underwhelming. 

10:08 - Don't play this poor man off, he's about to burst into fire in the sun. 

10:12 - Damn, the show was almost running on time for once! Quick, throw in an unnecessary musical number to crush the pacing again!

10:19 - Awww don't be hard on yourself, Conan. I'm sure your mom thinks you are handsome. 

Sebastian Stan is my pick for Best Actor, who has no chance at winning at all. Timothee probably will get it because the Academy is so boring. 

10:22 - Is Adrien Brody going to go up on stage and French kiss Cillian Murphy? 

I love the anecdote about the make-up artist who tried to remove Brody's nose, assuming it was a prosthetic. How do you know who Adrien Brody is and not know that snoze? Anyway, I hope this means Neil Cicirega does a BrodyQuest sequel now.  

10:27 - Brody strong-arming the orchestra. That's star power, baby! 

10:29 - Awww, Conan getting sincere about Tarantino! I would to. 

10:36 - This deep into the show and Hulu's live stream goes cold! 

10:37 - Alright, my friends on Discord saving my ass. I'm sure Demi has got it in the bag but rooting for Mikey! 

10:38 - Heeeeey Mikey! Boy, all the other nominees doing or saying something stupid really worked in her favor! 

10:39 - She's absolutely delightful and I hope she becomes a huge star. 

10:41 - "The best Oscar host ever." Okaaaaay, suuure. 

10:43 - Watch them still give it to "Emilia Perez" just to infuriate me, personally. 

10:44 - Honestly, I'm quite pleasantly surprised that "Anora" ended up sweeping. "The Brutalist" or "Emilia Perez" seemed like the more obvious favorite. Back in January, I picked "Conclave" as the "safest" choice. I've already seen a ton of people debating the merits of "Anora" already so I don't think it's a safe choice at all. But I really liked it! Good for these guys. Can't wait for the months of debate and discourse over this film and Sean Baker now. 

10:30 - Third time Sean Baker has been upon that stage. I guess this seals the deal on "Anora" winning Best Picture. I would not have expected it a few months ago! 

10:51 - General thoughts on the show tonight: Conan was great! Could've done without the musical tributes! The winners were very weird! No bizarre stage antics or fuck-ups, which I guess is good! Hulu can suck my ass! That's another award season in the books. Good night, everybody!

OSCARS 2024 LIVE BLOG!

6:30 - Welcome to Film Thoughts' annual live blog of the Academy Awards ceremony! 

I started blogging the awards show - literally writing down my thoughts on this here blog and just publishing it as I go - in 2010. At the time, the idea of a "Live Blog," a running commentary on a live event, was still a relevant idea. Nowadays, we just post our thoughts on Twitter via our phones or whatever. However, I am committed to doing things the old way. Actually nobody has ever done it like this, so I guess I'm committed to doing things my way! In other words, for the six people reading this: Reload early, reload often to see more of my pointless observations throughout the night! This is as off-the-cuff as I get these days.

6:40 - Because my film nerdiness about film and my obsessive compulsive streaks roll into each other, I feel the need to watch every one of the nominated movies. I like to be informed, ya know! Maybe I do this - and, by extension, write these reviews - because I like to pretend I'm an Academy member or something. Following that logic, here's what I would vote for if I got a vote. 

Does it make me crazy that I put more thought into these than the people actually the Academy? Yes! Yes, it does!

6:47 - I have just been informed that Lupito N'yonga's win for "12 Years a Slave" was almost a decade ago! I am crumbling into dust!

6:51 - It seems Hulu is doing a tell-all documentary about Bon Jovi, presumably because we've run out of eighties rock bands to do tell-all documentaries about.

6:59 - Once again, the time of year where I have to endure Jimmy Kimmel has arrived...

7:05 - Another reason to hate Daylight Savings Time: The Oscars starting while the sun is still out feels wrong.

7:07 - This is a good opening montage but, all these exciting or inspiring clips flashing on-screen with exactly ONE shot from "The Zone of Interest" is pretty funny.

7:09 - Oh yeah, there was an Actor's Strike last year.

7:11 - I'm not drinking tonight but if I was I would take a shot every time there's a Barbenheimer joke.

Christopher Nolan smiling politely at the porn addiction joke. Okay, "Sillian" Murphy was a decent joke.

7:12 - RDJ's reaction shot was so much better than the actual joke.

7:13 - Messi! Yes, Messi is here at the Oscars!

7:14 - Jokes about "Killers of the Flower Moon" being long were old four months ago, dude.

7:17 - Achievement in Casting is a weird category to add when people have been begging for a Stunts category for years. But it's fine.

The jokes are leaning hard on reaction shots tonight.

7:19 - A.I. could definitely take your job, Jimmy. 

7:20 - That's nice to invite a bunch of teamsters and folks on-stage. Workers unite!

"Should we give out some Oscars?" Please, get on with it!

7:22 - So each of the acting categories are going to be introduced like this? This will result in a lot of awkward looking at teleprompters, I predict. 

7:23 - This category is Da'Vine's to loose, as far as I'm concerned. 

7:26 - I'm glad she won. Hopefully they don't announce the nominations like this for every category or else we really are going to be here all night. 

7:28 - That was a sweet speech and I like the shout-out to her publicist. 

7:33 - I don't think it'll happen but I'm so rooting for Paul Giamatti to win tonight. Look at him, he looks so happy to be here!

7:34 - I'm ashamed to admit that I would absolutely watch the Silver Oscars. Jesus, when will the hosts stop making jokes about animation only being for kids?

7:35 - The Animated Shorts category was pretty weak this year but rooting for "Ninety-Five Senses" or "Pachyderm!" 

7:36 - I do believe I said "War is Over!" was going to win in my reviews, obviously because it is the worst of the nominees! 

7:38 - Haha, you're not going to play Sean Lennon off the stage, assholes! 

I do think "The Boy and the Heron" will win and I'm fine with that. But I really did love "Robot Dreams." 

7:39 - Hayao Miyazaki is too damn cool for the Oscars. He doesn't give a shit. Why would he show up for this? Gotta love it. 

Can't wait to hear Billy Ellish's nominated strom. 

7:44 - I am still delighted that a movie as fucking weird as "Poor Things" got so many nominations. 

Did a 97 year old man write Kimmel's jokes tonight?

7:46 - This bit is fucking painful. 

It has no chance of winning but "May December" is my fave in this category. Considering the plagiarism controversy that started today, it'll be super awkward if "The Holdovers" wins.

7:48 - "Anatomy of a Fall" had a very tight screenplay, so I can't complain about it winning. 

7:49 - I missed that they played the "P.I.M.P." steel drum music as they walked on-screen. Awesome lol

7:50 - "American Fiction" is genuinely my pick for Adapted Screenplay. Also I expect it to win because it has the word "Fiction" in the title and Academy voters are very literal. Or they'll just give it to "Oppenheimer," I don't know.

7:52 - Didn't anyone else hear that banging noise from off-stage? Did Jimmy Kimmel fall off a ladder? Anyway, I genuinely don't understand why Hollywood doesn't function under the "15 four million dollar movie" philosophy Cord is rambling about here. 

7:54 - I do think the Billie song is pretty but I'm seriously rooting for "I'm Just Ken." I hope it doesn't get overlooked for being the silly option.

7:57 - No denying that Billie has got the rizz though. Like, I do not pay attention to pop music at all but I genuinely think she has an extraordinary voice. 

7:58 - Why are they making David Allen Grier stand in a random hallway? 

8:03 - I did enjoy the dissonance of the "Beetlejuice" theme starting over footage from "Past Lives."

8:04 - The Make-Up category is so weak tonight. I'm rooting for "Poor Things" since it's the only one tonight that isn't simply boring, realistic, old age make-ups. 

8:05 - At least they got that much right!

8:06 - Guy tells a good publicist joke and they play him off the stage! Typical. Wouldn't be upset if "Poor Things" sweeps both Make-Up and Production Design but I think "Barbie" will probably get it. Jack Fisk worked on "Barbie?!" 

8:08 - My predictions have been strangely on-point today and, guys, I'm scared. 

8:09 - Academy, you're never going to engineer a viral moment as good as Will Smith smacking someone. Stop trying! 

8:11 - Is that John Cena's actual body? Dude looks weird. This bit isn't great but as a precursor to Best Costume, that's a decent punchline. It's gonna be "Barbie," right? 

8:12 - Alright, so "Poor Things" is just going to sweep the technical categories? I'm not mad, just surprised. 

8:14 - Always kind of annoys me that the Academy makes time for dumb-ass skits but doesn't let people talk a little longer. But, at the same time, I do understand that people would probably ramble forever if they didn't do something. 

8:19 - The wins have mostly been on-point tonight - except for Animated Short, boooo - and the acceptance speeches have been fine. But, boy, the show itself has been slowwwwwww. 

8:20 - This makes me wish they still did all the Best Song nominations in a montage. Can you imagine this in-between the two "Barbie" songs? 

8:22 - What kind of hardcore rapping name is "Bad Bunny?" 

It has zero chance of winning but "Io Capitano" is so good. 

8:23 - Oh boy, I wonder how awkward "The Zone of Interest's" acceptance speech will be? Great movie though. 

8:25 - Kind of disappointed that Jonathan Glazer went for some "both-side-isms" with his acceptance speech. 

8:26 - The premise of this bit is pretty bad but Emily Blunt and Ryan Gosling are selling it. The fact that they are honoring stuntmen really gives me hope they'll be preparing that for a proper category soon. 

8:32 - Okay, the AMC theater joke was solid. They do play a lot of commercials! 

8:35 - Sam Rockwell's beard rocks and it rocks well. 

8:37 - Christoph Waltz pontificating about Ken... Now that's art. 

8:38 - RDJ was my pick and and I'm glad he got it. Long overdue and he's fantastic in "Oppenheimer." Maybe next year, Gosling. 

8:39 - "I'd like to thank my terrible childhood." Jesus, they should let Robert host. 

It's amazing how much control of the stage this guy just takes within minutes. Total movie star charisma.

8:41 - The dog was clapping... THE DOG WAS CLAPPING. 

8:46 - She totally killed him, by the way. I believe she did it.

Anyway... ARNOLD IS IN THE HOUSE!

They did both try and kill Batman. "Batman, you son of a bitch!" 

8:47 - GODZILLA GODZILA GODZILLA GODZILLA

YES YES YES YES

8:48 - Arnold saying the words "Godzilla" at the Academy Awards... Is this real life? Am I awake? How is this possible? 

8:51 - Are you going to play the "Godzilla" team off the stage? Fuck you!

8:52 - I figured "Oppenheimer" had it in the bag. Editing was a pretty strong category this year. 

8:53 - "Chris Nolan, you're cool too." Accurate! 

8:54 - "American Symphony" is destined to be a forgotten Oscar nomination and I wouldn't vote for it to win. But I do like this song! It's pretty, you guys. 

8:55 - The decision to play clips from totally unrelated movies over this song was an odd one though.

8:59 - "Maestro" was the most painfully Oscar-bait-y movie in a nomination slate largely devoid of it this year. 

9:00 - I am digging the orchestral version of "Barbie Girl." 

9:01 - It's almost impressive how every single one of Kimmel's bit are just flopping tonight. 

9:02 - I'm sure "20 Days in Mariupol" will win Best Documentary Feature, on account of its "importance." Even if the film made me feel uneasy in some ways. As for Documentary Short, I have no idea. "Nai Nai & Wai Po" probably. This is a decent bit, Kate is doing here. 

9:04 - "Island In Between" was my pick and I knew it had no chance of winning. "The Last Repair Shop" was pleasant, so I guess I'm fine with this. 

9:05 - "The Eternal Memory" was my favorite of this slate, by the way. Heartbreaking film. Not surprised it didn't win though. 

9:09 - If "20 Days in Mariupol" winning an Oscar has any effect on the people in Ukraine, then I guess that film will have served its purpose. I'm still not sure movies, even documentary films, have any power to actually change the face of global politics though. How far can "awareness" take us, ya know? 

9:13 - Has there been a harder movie in Oscar history to fit into the pageantry of the night than "The Zone of Interest?" It just resists any sort of celebratory vibes. 

9:14 - I would genuinely love to see "El Conde" win Cinematography but that won't happen lol. It was a black-and-white movie about vampires! Of course I loved the way it looked!

"Oppenheimer" is a fine second choice. I probably would've given the Silver Oscar to "Killers of the Flower Moon," personally. But Hoyte van Hoytema is long overdue. 

9:16 - The Live Action short line-up was... Not the best. Please, give it to "Henry Sugar" and not that "The After" or "Red, White, and Blue" garbage. 

9:17 - Really wish Wes Anderson could have been here to accept his first Oscar. I guess this makes up for "Asteroid City" getting snubbed! One of these days, he's going to win Best Director and Best Picture for his third or fourth worst movie. 

9:18 - When will the curse of Diane Warren be lifted from the Oscars? Anyway, here's to "Flamin' Hot," another addition to the list of truly random ass movies to get nominated just because Warren touched them. 

9:24 - The more I think about "American Fiction," the more I loved it. One of the better movies about the creative process that I've seen recently. 

9:25 - John Mulhoney completely outclassing Jimmy Kimmel within seconds. Just comes out, does a totally unrelated bit about "Field of Dreams," and fucking kills it.

9:27 - Anyway, I feel like "The Zone of Interest" kind of has to win Best Sound, right? I mean, sound is so pivotal to that film. But "Oppenheimer's" sound design is definitely powerful too. 

Alright, good.

9:29 - This got has a nice hat and nice side burns. British people wishing folks Happy Mother's Day has become a real reoccurring theme tonight?

It's "Ken" time, baby. 

9:30 - I've been a fan of Gosling for a while but, really, he managed to find such a total match for his particular charisma in Ken. He made that whole damn movie, in my opinion. 

9:31 - The choreography here definitely deserves some notice. Holy shit, is that Slash?! 

9:33 - It was a showstopper in the movie and a showstopper tonight. A highlight of what has been a very slow night. 

9:38 - So that "Wicked" movie looks bad, right? 

9:39 - I'm personally rooting for "Killers of the Flower Moon" to take home Best Score but I bet "Oppenheimer" gets it. 

9:41 - Billie Ellish won Best Song because "What Was I Made For" was the serious song from "Barbie," even though anyone who just watched the performances could tell you that "I'm Just Ken" is the one that always brings the house down. But what do I know? 

9:43 - This acceptance speech is pretty fucking cute though, not going to lie. 

9:49 - Time for the annual game to see who gets left out of the In Memoriam montage. 

9:51 - The Academy's insistence on not giving the viewers at home a clear look at what names are appearing on-screen continues to annoy the hell out of me. It's such an easy thing not to fuck up and yet they do, every year!

9:56 - Kimmel's jokes are extremely heavy on puns tonight. He's not even trying. 

Anyway, Nic Cage is here, motherfuckers!

9:57 - Jeffrey Wright is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors working right now. Would love for him to win. He won't though! Paul Giamatti winning would be so fantastic but I'm still kind of banking on Cillian getting. 

9:58 - "Would I have done that? Hell yes!" And that's why Nic Cage rocks. Anyway, Bradley Cooper suuuuuucks. If he wins, I'm going to scream! 

10:00 - Cillian is great, so I do not object to him winning. It's kind of crazy that he's never even been nominated before? 

10:03 - So "Oppenheimer" is sweeping now, right? Just like we all knew it would. I like it when Steven Spielberg talks. 

10:04 - All the film bros I knew in college are vindicated. Nolan has an Oscar now. 

10:06 - I know I've been complaining all night about how flat the show has been but, I'll say this much... Staring the show at seven has made the evening go by a little faster. Will the broadcast actually be shorter than "Killers of the Flower Moon?" We are getting dangerously close. 

10:10 - Emma Stone has really crept up the predictions as we've gotten closer to the Oscars. LIly Gladstone winning is not certain, though I still think the Academy passing over a chance to give an Oscar to a Native American for the first time is unlikely. We shall see!

10:11 - Anyway, Michelle... She did it! 

10:13 - I love Carey Mulligan, so it really shows you how fucking mid "Maestro" was that I'm annoyed that she even got nominated for it. 

10:14 - Oh shit. People on Twitter are going to be soooooo mad. 

10:15 - Alright, there's going to be a massive backlash against "Poor Things" now. It's still a really good movie! There's going to be an even bigger backlash against Emma Stone now. She's still great! Look at how fucking charming she is right now! Lily Gladstone is great but let's stop forming petty rivalries over this shit. 

10:18 - I can't believe people like Jimmy Kimmel still think they're going to stop Trump with dumb jokes. We are so past that point, Jimmy! We can't snark our way out of this one...

10:20 - Anyway, here's Big Al. Pacino still has it though. Oppenheimer Sweep! 

10:25 - I love that one shot of Bradley Cooper looking sad.

And we're ending the night on a lame cell phone joke. Kimmel really did suck all the air out of hte room, didn't he?

10:26 - Wait, excuse me, we end on a stupid reference to the fake Kimmel/Matt Damon feud. How dare you drag Messi into this!

10:28 - Anyway, as for the show itself... Kimmel really fucking sucked as host tonight! He just seemed like he did not want to be there! The presentation got off to an extremely slow start and the pacing never quite perked up from there. However, there were some great moments from presenters and especially winners. "I'm Just Ken" brought the house down and fucking "Godzilla" won an Oscar! I can't be mad about that. Overall, I would say the show itself was a bland affair but, as always, the Oscars broadcast is always worth watching for those special wins.

And now that the Oscars are over, I can't get back to watching trash! Thank you and good night! 

OSCARS 2023 LIVE BLOG!

7:50 - Welcome once again to Film Thoughts 14th Annual Live Blog of the Academy Awards broadcast! Will anyone get slapped this year? Will Anthony Hopkins inexplicably win Best Actor? Will the correct movie be announced when the Best Picture envelope is opened? Will I want to crush Jimmy Kimmel's head with a rock before the night is over? I can't definitively answer any of these questions assurdedly except for that last one, which is definitely "yes."

Anyway, they had a TikToker on the pre-show tonight, which sounds about right.

7:54 - My internet has been patchy all evening, so if I disappear screaming into the night, that's probably why. Assuming I don't do that for some other reason. Austin Butler's best friend is his agent, which sounds like Elvis' relationship with the Colonel. 

8:00 - My clock says it's 8 o'clock now but I'm seeing a bath tile commercial right now lol 

8:01 - So nice to see The Northman and Nope in this opening montage, two great movies that weren't nominated for anything some reason. 

8:02 - Oh wow, Jimmy Kimmel is doing the Billy Crystal "inserted into the movie" gag thing. This bodes well for the rest of the night! 

By the way, I plan on taking a shot every time someone says the words "Will Smith" or "slap."

8:04 - Alright, making jokes about the Nicode Kidman AMC ad will be evergreen. 

8:05 - Brendan Fraser is just going to be on the verge of tears the entire night, isn't he? And I totally forgot that Ke Huy Quan was in "Encino Man." 

8:07 - Hey guys, did you know that Seth Rogan smokes a lot of pot???

8:08 - If Spielberg wasn't prepared to listen to jokes about his mom cucking his dad, he shouldn't have made a whole movie about it. 

John Williams is almost as old as your jokes are, Jimmy. Hey-o!

8:09 - "Babylon" was good, Jimmy. Fuck you. 

Oh wow, we are doing Nick Cannon jokes? Jesus, this is going to be a long night.

8:11 - Oh, first joke about the Slap! Shots-shots-shots!

Everybody loved "Top Gun: Maverick" but me. But nobody gives a shit what I think. 

8:13 - Second joke about the Slap. But this one was pretty good. 

8:15 - We're already up to like six jokes about the Slap, by my count. You think Jimmy is burning through them all first? That cut to Andrew Garfield made me laugh. 

8:16 - If you don't finish your speech up in sixty seconds, Rama Raos will throw a jaguar at you. 

8:17 - The Rock looking bitchin' in a salmon tux while presenting Animated Feature. I'm glad they aren't making jokes this year about how much animation sucks. 

8:18 - Pinocchio seems to be the favorite to win but I'd love it if Turning Red or Marcel the Shell pull off an upset win. And then there's The Sea Beast, definitely a movie that exists. 

8:19 - Pinocchio is definitely not among my favorite Del Toro movies but I can never complain about that guy getting more statues. I'm glad he's letting the co-director speak first. 

8:21 - Very nice speech, GDT.

8:24 - ABC actually thinks people are going to stay up to 1:00 to watch American Idol.

8:26 - Payakun is going to do a belly-flop on Jimmy Kimmel after he makes a joke about Lo'ak. 

8:28 - Boy, they are really banging the drum for inclusivity tonight? Anyway, give Short Round his Oscar already, you bastards. 

8:30 - Brian Tyree Henry is actually great in "Causeway." He'd be my second choice if Ke Huy Quan wasn't such an irresistible choice. 

YES!!!!

8:31 - I got to meet Ke Huy Quan back in 2018 and now he's an Oscar winner, which is not something I would've guessed at the time. Here's proof:

8:34 - I love Jamie Lee Curtis but I probably wouldn't have even given her a nomination for Everything Everywhere All at Once. There's no way in hell it'll actually happen but Hong Chau is my favorite of these performances. If Angela Basset or Jamie win, those are definitely career achievement Oscars. 

8:37 - Well, Jamie Lee is definitely never coming to Monster-Mania now lol 

She should've worn the hot dog fingers to accept the statue. EEAAO is going to sweep, isn't it? 

8:38 - Hell yeah, Jamie Lee giving a shout-out to horror fans. Prom Night Gang rise up. Gosh, she's so damn adorable. 

8:40 - "Tell It Like A Woman," maybe the most random movie to ever be nominated for an Oscar.

8:42 - As far as deeply mediocre ballads that got nominated because Diane Warren wrote it, "Applause" is honestly one of the more tolerable... But that performance was the definition of over-singing. 

8:48 - Lydia Tar is nominated for her performance as Cate Blanchett. 

Another joke about the Slap! Why is Todd Price wearing a fedora? Does he have a mouthful of Big League Chew? 

8:49 - Very nice of Riz Ahmed to give some kudos to Questlove, who got totally steamrolled last year by everything that happened. 

8:50 - I really want All the Beauty and the Bloodshed to win. But if Fire of Love wins, I won't be too surprised. Overall, the Documentary Feature slate this year was very strong. 

8:52 - Okay... that was unexpected. The Academy voters really want us to know how much they hate Vladimir Putin, I guess???

8:54 - For the record I liked "Navalny" and I hate Putin too. But that wasn't my pick.

8:55 - Rooting for "An Irish Goodbye." A pretty weak slate in this category this year!

I know a lot of people in the one Discord server I'm in hated this one but I thought it was cute and funny. shrugs

8:56 - Happy birthday, James!

8:58 - Micky Mouse holding a gun to the Academy President's head, demanding them to devote time to this trailer. 

9:03 - Give the Oscar to Jonathan Majors' tuxedo jacket. 

9:05 - Cinematography is a real mixed bag this year. I think Deakins is the most talented of all these cinematographers, so my vote probably would've been for "Empire of Light" or "Tar."

9:06 - So EEAAO is going to sweep the big categories and All Quiet is going to sweep the technical categories? 

9:07 - I was really afraid they were going to make Donnie Yen tell a Will Smith joke. Create a Best Stunt Work category, AMPAS! 

9:09 - David Byrne in the hot dog fingers and Raccacoonie appearing made this song getting nominated worth it. 

9:14 - Whatever "The Prank Panel" is, it does not look like a real TV show.

9:16 - The fact that Samuel L. Jackson doesn't have a competition Oscar is motherfuckin' bullshit. 

9:17 - Make-Up is another kind of mediocre slate this year. I fully expect "The Whale" to win, as it's Most Make-Up. But the way "All Quiet on the Western Front" had like visible blood vessels and thinks of that nature through the skin makes it my pick. Amazing, subtle work. 

9:19 - Fully expect certain groups and people to be utterly outraged by this win. 

9:20 - Okay, Morgan Freeman is doing the bald look now. Okay. Alright. 

9:21 - That fade to black there is the kind of technical awkwardness that makes me love live television. 

9:22 - Not a single Loony Tune in this Ode to Warner Bros montage.

Bullshit Arnold GIFfrom Bullshit GIFs

9:25 - Alright, I'm glad at least one donkey was up on stage today. Bring out Eo next! 

9:27 - Get Paul Dano and Julia Louis Dreyfus to host next year. 

9:28 - I would probably vote for "Elvis" but I think "Wakanda Forever" is going to win Costume Design.

Yep.

9:29 - I'm an easy mark for people dedicating their award wins to dead parents so this speech is Good In My Book. 101 years old is a great run. 

9:30 - OH SHIT NAATU NAATU TIME!!!

9:32 - YES DANCING WITH THE SUSPENDERS YEEEAH

9:33 - The scene in "RRR" where all the English ladies push their boyfriends and shout "GO AWAY" in unison made me believe in God. And then Ram taking a fall so his buddy could win the dance contest made me certain God is real. 

9:35 - I hope Ron Perlman was paid well to participate in whatever this stupid advertising campaign is. But I know, in my heart, that he wasn't. 

9:38 - Okay, the "Room tone" joke made me chuckle. 

9:40 - Gotta admit that the boardcast tonight has been pretty slow and boring and also low-key exactly what I want the Oscars broadcast to be. If it wasn't for all this promotional shit, I'd be fine with all of this so far. 

9:41 - And now introducing the two sexiest people in the world. 

9:42 - "All Quiet on the Western Front" is fated to win but "Close" is my personal choice. The Best International Feature slate this year is extremely strong. 

9:43 - I like this guy's accent. 

9:50 - "The Fabelmans" is so good. I want it to win Best Picture. Another joke about the Slap. I don't appreciate the jokes about the show being too long because they don't want to cut shit.

9:51 - "Haulout" probably won't win but I really want it to. 

9:53 - At least the mildly racist "Strangers at the Gates" didn't win. That lady wore her best suri and everything and they are just trying to play her off the stage. So fucking rude! 

9:54 - The Boy Etc. was extremely not good. Literally everything else would be preferable.

"My Year of Dicks" was robbed!!!  

9:56 - I can't tell if Charlie's inarticulate rambling is cute or hilarious or annoying. His dog is in a hotel, you guys. 

9:58 - And now presenting a close-up on Lady Gaga's face. 

10:00 - The Oscar broadcast invoking MTV Unplugged for some reason tonight. 

As far as Lady Gaga power ballads go, "Hold My Hand" is pretty good. But I swear to god, if "Naatu Naatu" doesn't win... 

10:01 - The ode to Tony Scott is very classy though. I appreciate that. 

10:03 - Very bold of the Academy to push all the stupid-ass skits to the commercial breaks this year...

10:06 - Hugh Grant's scrotum face just walked away with this entire show, I think.

10:08 - "Babylon" is my pick for Production Design but I don't think most people liked that movie. 

10:09 - It's a great night for German accents. 

10:11 - "Babylon" and "Banshees" both had excellent scores. In fact, all five of these are really good. 

10:12 - Wow, "All Quiet on the Western Front" and "EEAAO" really are going to sweep tonight. 

10:22 - Holy shit, "Cocaine Bear' is at the Oscars. And it sounds like Elizabeth Banks has been up all night doing cocaine. 

10:23 - This is officially my favorite terrible gag at the show tonight.

Not to be a dick about this but I thought the visual effects in "Wakanda Forever" were, as the kids say, "mid."

10:24 - "The Way of Water" winning Best Visual Effects was a slam dunk. 

10:26 - "We need to thank our..." BWONNNG

Die in a grease fire, Jimmy. 

10:27 - Wow, she's so uncomfortable.

When the people on Twitter are getting bigger laughs than the host...

10:30 - Like this is pretty and all but, seriously, if they snub "Naatu Naatu," I will never stop raging. 

10:32 - Okay, actually, I think I hate this song now. If it wins, I will DEFINITELY hate it now. 

10:36 - The amount of vitriol directed at EEAAO on Film Twitter has recommitted me to spending less time on Twitter. Like, I get it if it's not your thing but the sheer intensity of the hatred is fucking weird.

10:37 - FUCK YEAH JAMES HONG 

10:38 - "Nerds who sit in front of their computers all day, otherwise known as writers." Accurate. 

10:40 - The Daniels winning Original Screenplay and then Spielberg getting Best Director is a compromise I'm willing to entertain. 

10:42 - Okay, see, how can you hate these sincere nerds? They seem really nice! I'm glad they won. 

Feels like "All Quiet..." has Adapted Screenplay at this point. I probably would've voted for "Glass Onion." 

10:43 - They went with the political choice, I guess. "Women Talking" is good. Did the Mouse force the Oscar voice over lady to say "One Magic Christmas" is a "Disney classic?" 

10:46 - "A special appearance from Lenny Kravitz" feels like a threat. 

10:50 - See, I didn't like "Maverick" but you don't see me being a dick on social media about it. 

On behalf of a grateful nation, we thank you for blowing up that power plant build by... Some country.

10:51 - Every single joke Jimmy is telling tonight is a fucking flop.

Got the feeling "All Quiet" is going to walk away with the Sound award but that's the category I must think it deserves. 

10:55 - You're welcome, "Top Gun: Maverick" Sound Guy. 

NAATU NAATU TIME YOU FUCKERS DON'T JERK ME AROUND

10:56 - YES YES YES

10:57 - Oh my god, yes! Fuck yes! The Best Song winners should always have to sing their acceptance speeches. 

10:58 - Beloved star of "The Fanatic," John Travolta. 

10:59 - If I become a famous film industry person and then die and get included at the Oscars In Memoriam montage, please do not let Lenny Kravitz sing over my name. 

11:01 - Angelo Badalamenti was a real one. Miss him. 

11:06 - Lots of great editing on the slate this year! I feel like EEAAO will get it and deserves it but almost any of these choices would be fine by me. 

11:09 - That was your second movie, dude? Holy shit. 

11:11 - Last chance to give that plucky newcomer Steven Spielberg an Oscar tonight. 

11:12 - I like these guys. They seem nice and they make good movies. 

11:14 - "I will love you no matter what." See, he loves his son! I like that. He's nice! It's okay. 

11:19 - Outlaw Jimmy Kimmel 

11:20 - I mean this with all due respect, ladies: You look very nice tonight. 

11:21 - Austin Butler would've gotten my vote, if they allowed me to vote. But I'm still kind of rooting for Fraser. 

11:23 - Didn't really like the movie that much but I'm glad he won. It's a great come back story. He's earned that award. 

11:24 - Gosh, I'm getting tears in my eyes from this acceptance speech. He's really having emotions right now. I just want to give him a big hug, you guys. 

11:26 - I kind of want them to give it to Andrea Riseborough or Ana de Armas just to see how folks would melt the fuck down over it. But in all seriousness, it should be Blanchett. 

Wow, uh, they really went with the moment right before the rape scene for de Armas' Oscar clip? Uh okay. That's a choice. 

11:28 - I can't, in all good conscious, be mad about Michelle Yeoh winning an Oscar. Even if I'd have ranked her like third on my personal ballet. It was a really good performance in a movie I liked a lot! But, once again, I feel like this win is more of a career achievement award than anything else. 

11:31 - "The movies are BACK, y'all" is the big uniting theme tonight, it seems. 

11:32 - We need some more of Harrison Ford's dgaf attitude tonight. He's too invested. 

11:33 - Not a single surprise tonight in any of the big categories. 

11:34 - "Everything Everywhere All at Once" would not have been my choice for Best Picture but I enjoyed it a lot. And it getting Michelle Yeoh, Ku Huy Quan, and James Hong up on the stage together is pretty neat. 

11:37 - It's amazing how relatively smooth the broad cast goes when you don't try any stupid bullshit like cutting winners out of the show or not performing all the songs! Normal people will say this was boring and it was boring but I'm a movie nerd so I liked it. 

Thanks to anyone who has read my bullshit this month. It's over!