The viewing sort of tapered for me this week. Work and classes made it hard to get up and put in a DVD though luckily Turner Classic Movies line-up was uniformly excellent.
Halloween was a bit of a disappointment, admittedly. I didn’t have any plans, didn’t dress up, and sort of had to throw something together at the last minute. JD was over again. In between movies, we pulled out the classic Playstation. I got killed a lot in the original “Resident Evil” but then proceeded to own his ass a half-dozen times in “Darkstalkers 3.” We pigged out on Reese's Sticks and odd creation from our local pizza parlor called "Pizza Nachoes."
We had three trick-or-treaters which might not sound like a lot but is an improvement over the zero we got the past two years. Glad I picked up candy just in case.
October 25th:
The Blob (1958)
It’s pure camp from beginning to end but I’d say the title creature’s inherited ick-factor rightfully insures it’s status as a minor classic (And it’s place in the Criterion Collection!) (7/10)
Die, Monster, Die! (1965)
The gothic sets produce some fine atmosphere but, whoo, this one gets goofy before it’s over. (6/10)
S. Darko (2009)
Yes, it doesn’t balance the sub-plots, characters, or the inner logic of its universe as well as the first. And yes, the way it basically restarts the story several times is a cheat. However, I was really surprised by how well-made this is and was drawn in by the lead character and it’s story. (7/10)
October 26th:
Trick r’ Treat (2008)
Doesn’t beat “Creepshow” at it’s own game but at least some of the hype is deserved. I’d say the last story was the best. (7/10)
Season’s Greetings (1996)
A really cute short to build a feature on and I love the Charlie Brown gone evil look. (7/10)
October 27th:
Halloween 4: Return of Michael Myers (1988)
Formulaic sequel with one or two fun ideas. (Like Michael attacking a redneck lynch mob in the back of their pick-up truck.) Man, the mask and costume looks bad in this one. (6/10)
“Lost Tapes:” White River Monster
The whole episode takes place within a very small area, which makes for kind of stale viewing. (5/10)
The Children (2008)
I haven’t seen a lot of killer kid movies, but it’ll be hard to top this one. (8/10)
October 28th:
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1978)
There are few horror movies more fascinating then this one. (9/10)
October 29th:
Captive Wild Woman (1943)
I can see why Paula the Ape Woman never became as iconic as the other Universal monsters. (5/10)
Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
I’m beginning to think I must be a closet goth or something for liking this one so much. (8/10)
Halloween (1978)
You know, why did the sequels have to throw in the brother-sister connection? Myers stalks Laurie Strode because she showed up at the house that day. To build a mythology or back story around the character is ridiculous because it’s his distinct lack of those things that make him interesting in the first place. He’s just The Shape, the shadow, the other, the random cruelness of the world given form. (9/10)
October 30th:
Mad Love (1933)
I love all the macabre little details, the fantastic atmosphere, and Peter Loree’s career-defining, fantastically creepy performance. (9/10)
Dead Snow (2009)
Oh sure, we’ve seen most of this stuff all ready but, damn, I had a good time. I’d say it surpasses “Shock Waves” as best Nazi Zombie flick. (8/10)
October 31st:
Dinosaurs: “When Food Goes Bad”
“You killed Cabby!” is pretty much burnt into my brain from repeated childhood viewings of this episode. (7/10)
It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown! (1966)
This Kindertrauma article makes me appreciate the Great Pumpkin even more. (8/10)
Garfield’s Halloween Adventure (1985)
Not even the Garfield Minus Garfield method could improve this subpar effort. We really didn’t need those musical numbers. (5/10)
Night of the Creeps (1986)
Sure is nice to see this movie in high-definition after so many years of TV recordings and bootlegs. (9/10)
Aqua Teen Hunger Force: The Shaving
Willy Nelson is probably my favorite ATHF one-off character. (7/10)
The Shining (1980)
This is a good transitional movie. It’s scary as hell, making it perfect Halloween viewing, but its wintery setting gets you ready for the season ahead. (9/10)
So... That was Halloween. I'll do better next year.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Halloween Viewing: Week Three
Internet problems prevented me from getting this up sooner. Sorry, guys.
October 18th:
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Sure, the “slacker gets life back together” plot is a little trite but I’m constantly amazed at just how good the rest of this movie is. Also, having seen “Spaced” now, it sort of ups my appreciation for this one. (9/10)
TerrorVision (1986)
It feels like they filmed a first draft. There are a number of clever ideas and scenes here but the whole thing feels very half-baked and unfocused. I dig the theme song. (5/10)
Matinee (1993)
The coming-of-age story is cute and well acted but I honestly think Dante should have just made “Mant!” as a feature instead. (7/10)
Poltergeist (1982)
When this movie kicks into scare gear, it’s really effective. I could do without all the Spielberg-y “love conquers all” schtick, but when where talking killer clown dolls, evil trees, giant ghost beasts, and tearing your own face off, I’m all there. (7/10)
October 19th:
Brotherhood of the Wolf (2001)
So buried in it’s own comic book extravagance that it comes very close to being completely ridiculous. By the same accord, it’s hard to argue with a period costume drama that has Mark Dacascos kicking people in the face. (7/10)
October 20th:
The Final Destination (2009)
I prefer to believe that Death is a sadistic bastard that allows people to escape his design just so he can murder them in contrived, ridiculous ways, rather then buy that every single structure around me is a rickety deathtrap waiting to happen. Ignited sawdust? (5/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Death Crawler
A couple isolated on an island full of giant, killer centipedes is actually a pretty good idea for a movie. (7/10)
The Fly (1986)
With an auteur like Cronenberg behind the wheel, it would’ve been good regardless, but Goldblum and Davis make this great. (9/10)
The Fly II (1989)
Pretty much on auto-pilot until the full-blown Martinfly makes his big appearance near the end, at which point it becomes a solid monster/splatter movie. Still the “good fly-monster vs. evil corporation” story is so simplistic compared to the complexity of the first. But hey, Princess Vespa’s got a decent sex scene. (5.5/10)
October 21st:
Ed Wood (1994)
I’m watching a lot of not-really-horror-movies this Halloween, aren’t I? Eh, a movie about the people who made horror movies is close enough. (9/10)
Hatred of a Minute (2002)
I appreciate what was attempted here but the movie can’t seem to decide if it’s a gorefest or a psychologically thriller. Either way, the indie-movie acting is what really undoes this one. (5/10)
Christine (1983)
Hey, I kind of love this movie! I’m as surprised as every one else is. (8/10)
October 22nd:
The Happening (2008)
Don’t be surprised if, at some point in the future, you see this one playing with “The Wicker Man” remake on an unintentional comedy double bill. (3/10)
Paranormal Activity (2007)
A creepy ghost flick that does some mildly clever things? Sure. Scariest movie ever made? No fucking way. With the amount of hype and marketing behind this one, just about any movie could’ve been pushed to this level of success. (7/10)
October 23rd:
Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)
Julie Adams and the Creature will always be my favorite horror couple. (9/10)
Basket Case (1982)
They don’t make high quality trash cinema like this anymore. (7/10)
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
There’s much more slow-mo in this then I remember but I maintain that this is the best “Freddy vs. Jason” movie that could've been made. (8/10)
The Prey (1984): Uncut
I suppose this is the superior cut. The often discussed, rarely seen softcore footage is forced in but fascinating. Most of the nature footage is gone, quickening the pace considerably. However, my heart still belongs to the classic version, with the scenes of Jackson “Shazam!” Bostwick talking to a deer and rocking a hardcore banjo solo inserted into the movie at seemingly random intervals. (7/10)
(Big thanks goes out to Joseph at The-Bodycount-Continues for getting me a copy of this rarity.)
October 24th:
Bad Ronald (1974)
There’s admittedly a lot of TV movie creakiness here but the concept of someone stalking you from within your own home is quite creepy. (7/10)
Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
I’d like to say this is the unfairly maligned Blackhorse entry in the franchise, but it’s not. It’s truthfully just not a very good movie. Tom Atkins’ sleazy performance is all that kept my attention. (5/10)
As we head into October's final week, with Halloween right around the corner, I'll try and get as much stuff watched this week as possible.
October 18th:
Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Sure, the “slacker gets life back together” plot is a little trite but I’m constantly amazed at just how good the rest of this movie is. Also, having seen “Spaced” now, it sort of ups my appreciation for this one. (9/10)
TerrorVision (1986)
It feels like they filmed a first draft. There are a number of clever ideas and scenes here but the whole thing feels very half-baked and unfocused. I dig the theme song. (5/10)
Matinee (1993)
The coming-of-age story is cute and well acted but I honestly think Dante should have just made “Mant!” as a feature instead. (7/10)
Poltergeist (1982)
When this movie kicks into scare gear, it’s really effective. I could do without all the Spielberg-y “love conquers all” schtick, but when where talking killer clown dolls, evil trees, giant ghost beasts, and tearing your own face off, I’m all there. (7/10)
October 19th:
Brotherhood of the Wolf (2001)
So buried in it’s own comic book extravagance that it comes very close to being completely ridiculous. By the same accord, it’s hard to argue with a period costume drama that has Mark Dacascos kicking people in the face. (7/10)
October 20th:
The Final Destination (2009)
I prefer to believe that Death is a sadistic bastard that allows people to escape his design just so he can murder them in contrived, ridiculous ways, rather then buy that every single structure around me is a rickety deathtrap waiting to happen. Ignited sawdust? (5/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Death Crawler
A couple isolated on an island full of giant, killer centipedes is actually a pretty good idea for a movie. (7/10)
The Fly (1986)
With an auteur like Cronenberg behind the wheel, it would’ve been good regardless, but Goldblum and Davis make this great. (9/10)
The Fly II (1989)
Pretty much on auto-pilot until the full-blown Martinfly makes his big appearance near the end, at which point it becomes a solid monster/splatter movie. Still the “good fly-monster vs. evil corporation” story is so simplistic compared to the complexity of the first. But hey, Princess Vespa’s got a decent sex scene. (5.5/10)
October 21st:
Ed Wood (1994)
I’m watching a lot of not-really-horror-movies this Halloween, aren’t I? Eh, a movie about the people who made horror movies is close enough. (9/10)
Hatred of a Minute (2002)
I appreciate what was attempted here but the movie can’t seem to decide if it’s a gorefest or a psychologically thriller. Either way, the indie-movie acting is what really undoes this one. (5/10)
Christine (1983)
Hey, I kind of love this movie! I’m as surprised as every one else is. (8/10)
October 22nd:
The Happening (2008)
Don’t be surprised if, at some point in the future, you see this one playing with “The Wicker Man” remake on an unintentional comedy double bill. (3/10)
Paranormal Activity (2007)
A creepy ghost flick that does some mildly clever things? Sure. Scariest movie ever made? No fucking way. With the amount of hype and marketing behind this one, just about any movie could’ve been pushed to this level of success. (7/10)
October 23rd:
Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)
Julie Adams and the Creature will always be my favorite horror couple. (9/10)
Basket Case (1982)
They don’t make high quality trash cinema like this anymore. (7/10)
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
There’s much more slow-mo in this then I remember but I maintain that this is the best “Freddy vs. Jason” movie that could've been made. (8/10)
The Prey (1984): Uncut
I suppose this is the superior cut. The often discussed, rarely seen softcore footage is forced in but fascinating. Most of the nature footage is gone, quickening the pace considerably. However, my heart still belongs to the classic version, with the scenes of Jackson “Shazam!” Bostwick talking to a deer and rocking a hardcore banjo solo inserted into the movie at seemingly random intervals. (7/10)
(Big thanks goes out to Joseph at The-Bodycount-Continues for getting me a copy of this rarity.)
October 24th:
Bad Ronald (1974)
There’s admittedly a lot of TV movie creakiness here but the concept of someone stalking you from within your own home is quite creepy. (7/10)
Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
I’d like to say this is the unfairly maligned Blackhorse entry in the franchise, but it’s not. It’s truthfully just not a very good movie. Tom Atkins’ sleazy performance is all that kept my attention. (5/10)
As we head into October's final week, with Halloween right around the corner, I'll try and get as much stuff watched this week as possible.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Halloween Viewing: Week Two

Classes and the flu kept me from seeing as much as I wanted to this week.
Did I mention I finished reading Richard Laymon's "The Cellar" earlier this month? After reading and liking a few Jack Ketchum novels, Laymon was recommended to me as the next logical step in my journey into splatter-punk. I figure his first published novel and one of his most popular books would be a good place to start. I liked it, for the most part. The murder, rape, and general abuse of children is all typical eighties shock stuff, but what I really liked about the book was the almost old-fashion "monster in an old house" premise it has. The whole thing plays out a bit like a darker, much more twisted EC Comic. I thought the down beat ending was unnecessary though. So, I'm thinking "Island" is going to be the next of this author I read. What do you think, readers? Any suggestions?
Anyway, on with the list.
October 10th:
Werewolf of London (1935)Considering how much the modern werewolf genre is informed by “The Wolfman,” it’s fun to think about how things would be different if this movie was more successful in it’s time. On it’s own, it’s a pretty solid Jekyll and Hyde riff though Henry Hull is sort of a dick the whole time, even before his transformation. (7/10)
The Hunger (1983)
There’s some pretty visuals here but it’s not surprising that the lesbian love scene is all people seem to remember about this movie. (6/10) (Also, isn’t it weird that Cliff De Young, seen playing Brad last night in “Shock Treatment,” plays the lover of Susan Sarandon, the original Janet, in this movie? That’s weird, right?)
Theatre of Blood (1973)
A more twisted and, appropriately, more theatrical take on the Dr. Phibes formula. One of Price’s best roles and pretty much without questions his goriest film. (8/10)
October 11th:
The Invisible Man (1933)
This has got to be one of the earliest examples of a true horror-comedy. (8/10)
Lord of the Flies (1963)
Just as slow as the book but less overwrought. (5/10)
October 12th:
Don’t Look Now (1973)
The movie gets kudos for it’s fantastic score, great lead performances, and startling visual style. I don’t know why this is always referred to as a horror film, it’s more of a thriller. The murder subplot is tedious but even knowing the ending before hand can’t rob it of its power. (8/10)
The Mummy (1932)
More spiritual, romantic, and creepier then “Dracula,” the film its most often compared to. (8/10)
The Mummy’s Hand (1940)
A fun, pulpy adventure flick. (7/10)
October 13th:
Reincarnation (2005)
Some of the trippy shit and studying of film differentiates it from the J-horror glut, but even the Japanese had to be groaning about how they had seen so much of this before. (5/10)
“Lost Tapes:” Werewolf
I’ll admit that the twist ending caught me off-guard. (6/10)
“Lost Tapes:” Skinwalker
Some okay build-up but the conclusion was really goofy. (5/10)
October 15th:
Phantom of the Opera (1925)
That this movie is over eighties years old and is still the most faithful adaptation of the book, among countless others, is kind of sad. Still, stiff direction aside, Chaney’s performance makes this a complete classic. (8/10)
Dead End (2003)
The great cast and mid-way turn into horror/comedy makes this a good time. It’s also about an hour longer then it needs to be. Coupled with the obvious twist ending, I bet this would’ve made a pretty awesome “Twilight Zone” episode. (7/10)
Tower of London (1939)
Rathbone and Karloff are mesmerizing (I love the scene where Richard suggests something so awful it even makes the immoral Mord pause.) but the movie falters when focusing on any of the other characters or the convoluted royal family stuff. I prefer Roger Cormon’s remake. (6/10)
October 16th:
“Psych:” Let's Get Hairy
Not as classic as the slasher episode from last season but it’s good to see David Naughton getting work, and the “Hungry like the Wolf” montage made the whole episode worth while. (7/10)
Spider Baby, or The Maddest Story Ever Told (1968)
This movie is real underrated. It’s sort of the perfect crossroad between the classical horror of the 30s and 40s and the exploitation horror of the late sixties and seventies. Not to mention that the Merrye clan is such a fascinating, interesting group of character. A sequel or two that explored their dynamic more would’ve been great. (9/10)
Little Shop of Horrors (1986)
I love the scene where Audrey II leans forward and checks for loose change in the pay phone. That’s a gag that costs hundreds of dollars and hours of work that you might miss if you blink. Talk about a commitment to comedy! (9/10)
Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn (1987)
The demon-hand-o-vision is my favorite shot in the movie. (9/10)
Grace (2009)
The subplots needed to be cut but, at the same time, it needed to be longer. However, Jordan Ladd’s performance and that shocker ending makes it worth while. (7/10)
Werewolf of London (1935)Considering how much the modern werewolf genre is informed by “The Wolfman,” it’s fun to think about how things would be different if this movie was more successful in it’s time. On it’s own, it’s a pretty solid Jekyll and Hyde riff though Henry Hull is sort of a dick the whole time, even before his transformation. (7/10)
The Hunger (1983)
There’s some pretty visuals here but it’s not surprising that the lesbian love scene is all people seem to remember about this movie. (6/10) (Also, isn’t it weird that Cliff De Young, seen playing Brad last night in “Shock Treatment,” plays the lover of Susan Sarandon, the original Janet, in this movie? That’s weird, right?)
Theatre of Blood (1973)
A more twisted and, appropriately, more theatrical take on the Dr. Phibes formula. One of Price’s best roles and pretty much without questions his goriest film. (8/10)
October 11th:
The Invisible Man (1933)
This has got to be one of the earliest examples of a true horror-comedy. (8/10)
Lord of the Flies (1963)
Just as slow as the book but less overwrought. (5/10)
October 12th:
Don’t Look Now (1973)
The movie gets kudos for it’s fantastic score, great lead performances, and startling visual style. I don’t know why this is always referred to as a horror film, it’s more of a thriller. The murder subplot is tedious but even knowing the ending before hand can’t rob it of its power. (8/10)
The Mummy (1932)
More spiritual, romantic, and creepier then “Dracula,” the film its most often compared to. (8/10)
The Mummy’s Hand (1940)
A fun, pulpy adventure flick. (7/10)
October 13th:
Reincarnation (2005)
Some of the trippy shit and studying of film differentiates it from the J-horror glut, but even the Japanese had to be groaning about how they had seen so much of this before. (5/10)
“Lost Tapes:” Werewolf
I’ll admit that the twist ending caught me off-guard. (6/10)
“Lost Tapes:” Skinwalker
Some okay build-up but the conclusion was really goofy. (5/10)
October 15th:
Phantom of the Opera (1925)
That this movie is over eighties years old and is still the most faithful adaptation of the book, among countless others, is kind of sad. Still, stiff direction aside, Chaney’s performance makes this a complete classic. (8/10)
Dead End (2003)
The great cast and mid-way turn into horror/comedy makes this a good time. It’s also about an hour longer then it needs to be. Coupled with the obvious twist ending, I bet this would’ve made a pretty awesome “Twilight Zone” episode. (7/10)
Tower of London (1939)
Rathbone and Karloff are mesmerizing (I love the scene where Richard suggests something so awful it even makes the immoral Mord pause.) but the movie falters when focusing on any of the other characters or the convoluted royal family stuff. I prefer Roger Cormon’s remake. (6/10)
October 16th:
“Psych:” Let's Get Hairy
Not as classic as the slasher episode from last season but it’s good to see David Naughton getting work, and the “Hungry like the Wolf” montage made the whole episode worth while. (7/10)
Spider Baby, or The Maddest Story Ever Told (1968)
This movie is real underrated. It’s sort of the perfect crossroad between the classical horror of the 30s and 40s and the exploitation horror of the late sixties and seventies. Not to mention that the Merrye clan is such a fascinating, interesting group of character. A sequel or two that explored their dynamic more would’ve been great. (9/10)
Little Shop of Horrors (1986)
I love the scene where Audrey II leans forward and checks for loose change in the pay phone. That’s a gag that costs hundreds of dollars and hours of work that you might miss if you blink. Talk about a commitment to comedy! (9/10)
Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn (1987)
The demon-hand-o-vision is my favorite shot in the movie. (9/10)
Grace (2009)
The subplots needed to be cut but, at the same time, it needed to be longer. However, Jordan Ladd’s performance and that shocker ending makes it worth while. (7/10)
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Halloween Viewing: Week One
So, it's October, in case you hadn't notice. Halloween's coming up and, as a horror fan, I use this as an excuse to watch a whole bunch of my genre favorites.
However, seeing as how I didn't have anything formal prepared for this blog, I was just going to let this month go by without anything happening. But, after looking at how every other film blog under the sun is getting in on the fun, I couldn't resist. If I'm having a horror movie marathon anyway, why not do brief write-ups for each one I watch?
Anyway, I started this year's marathon the way I start every year: With viewings of many of the classic Universal monster movies, because these films are what I asscioate the Halloweens of my childhood with. I want to do a Report Card of some sort for this series some day but these mini-reviews will do for now. A recent Horror Etc. podcast also got me in the mood to revisit some Vincent Price classics I hadn't seen in a while. Also peppered throughout are stuff from my Netflix queue and whatever recent horror TV shows and movies I catch.
October 4th:
Frankenstein (1931)
Perhaps the single most iconic horror film ever made and one that will live forever. (9/10)
Dracula (1931)
Staginess aside, I’ll admit to liking this one more and more every time I see it. It's classical Gothic imagery strikes a cord. (8/10)
Feast III: The Happy Ending (2009)
I liked the giant robot and the alt chick’s tits and nothing else. (4/10)
Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Maybe the best horror sequel of all time and just the sort of classy affair I needed to clean my pallet after that shitty DTV sequel. (9/10)
Dracula’s Daughter (1936)Still not a fan of the comic relief or romantic subplots, but it’s heavy character-driven story and feminist subtext makes it one of the most subtle of the original Universal horror cycle. Also, I think this might be the first time vampirism was shown as an addiction. (8/10)
October 5th:
Murder in the Rue Morgue (1932)
The Expressionistic atmosphere sure goes a long way, making this one of the creepier of the original classics. (7/10)
House of Wax (1953)
Pretty hokey by today’s standards but this movie made me a Vincent Price fan. (7/10)
October 6th:
Zombieland (2009)
I liked the zombie killing, not so much the Twinky obsession. (7/10)
The Black Cat (1934)
My original complaint about this was I couldn’t buy Lugosi as the hero and Karloff as the villain. I see now that what’s brilliant about this movie is the way it plays these two icons against each other and both are casted against type. Lugosi gives one of his best performances as the revenge obsessed man while Karloff is at his most sinister. (8/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Southern Sasquatch
The redneck stuff is pretty campy but the monster aspects are convincing. (6/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Chupacabra
Maybe a little light on Chupa-content but not a bad example of what this show does well. (6/10)
The Raven (1935)
A much more traditional film then “The Black Cat” but Lugosi and Karloff are still great together. (7/10)
The Fly (1958)
That a cheesy, dialogue-and-character-driven, 50s reactionary, domestic sci-fi drama like this could be nine year old me’s favorite movie says more about me then it does this movie. Still, the acting is awfully good and Andre-Fly scrawling “I love you” on the chalkboard is still kinda’ heartbreaking. (9/10)
October 7th:
The Wolfman (1941)After seeing this multiple times now, I think I can say the “Vertigo”-style freak-out is my favorite scene. (8/10)
The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)There’s sincerity and almost sweetness about this campy predecessor to slashers films and modern torture horror. (8/10)
Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman (1943)
I would’ve preferred a solo Wolfman sequel because the Frankenstein aspect seems a little forced in and Lugosi was a lousy monster. Still, you can’t fault the fun factor of the very first monster mash. (7/10)
October 09:
Old pal JD picked out this night’s viewing, two flicks he's been wanting to see for a while but hadn't gotten around to yet. Thus the slightly unsensonal choices.
Shock Treatment (1981)
I remember this movie being less bad last time I watched it, but I still like the music. (6/10)
My Bloody Valentine (1981): Extended Cut
The nasty gore is what people remember but this essential retro-slasher has also got a lovable cast of characters. (7/10)
Come back next week for more fun!
However, seeing as how I didn't have anything formal prepared for this blog, I was just going to let this month go by without anything happening. But, after looking at how every other film blog under the sun is getting in on the fun, I couldn't resist. If I'm having a horror movie marathon anyway, why not do brief write-ups for each one I watch?
Anyway, I started this year's marathon the way I start every year: With viewings of many of the classic Universal monster movies, because these films are what I asscioate the Halloweens of my childhood with. I want to do a Report Card of some sort for this series some day but these mini-reviews will do for now. A recent Horror Etc. podcast also got me in the mood to revisit some Vincent Price classics I hadn't seen in a while. Also peppered throughout are stuff from my Netflix queue and whatever recent horror TV shows and movies I catch.
October 4th:
Frankenstein (1931)
Perhaps the single most iconic horror film ever made and one that will live forever. (9/10)
Dracula (1931)
Staginess aside, I’ll admit to liking this one more and more every time I see it. It's classical Gothic imagery strikes a cord. (8/10)
Feast III: The Happy Ending (2009)
I liked the giant robot and the alt chick’s tits and nothing else. (4/10)
Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Maybe the best horror sequel of all time and just the sort of classy affair I needed to clean my pallet after that shitty DTV sequel. (9/10)
Dracula’s Daughter (1936)Still not a fan of the comic relief or romantic subplots, but it’s heavy character-driven story and feminist subtext makes it one of the most subtle of the original Universal horror cycle. Also, I think this might be the first time vampirism was shown as an addiction. (8/10)
October 5th:
Murder in the Rue Morgue (1932)
The Expressionistic atmosphere sure goes a long way, making this one of the creepier of the original classics. (7/10)
House of Wax (1953)
Pretty hokey by today’s standards but this movie made me a Vincent Price fan. (7/10)
October 6th:
Zombieland (2009)
I liked the zombie killing, not so much the Twinky obsession. (7/10)
The Black Cat (1934)
My original complaint about this was I couldn’t buy Lugosi as the hero and Karloff as the villain. I see now that what’s brilliant about this movie is the way it plays these two icons against each other and both are casted against type. Lugosi gives one of his best performances as the revenge obsessed man while Karloff is at his most sinister. (8/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Southern Sasquatch
The redneck stuff is pretty campy but the monster aspects are convincing. (6/10)
“Lost Tapes”: Chupacabra
Maybe a little light on Chupa-content but not a bad example of what this show does well. (6/10)
The Raven (1935)
A much more traditional film then “The Black Cat” but Lugosi and Karloff are still great together. (7/10)
The Fly (1958)
That a cheesy, dialogue-and-character-driven, 50s reactionary, domestic sci-fi drama like this could be nine year old me’s favorite movie says more about me then it does this movie. Still, the acting is awfully good and Andre-Fly scrawling “I love you” on the chalkboard is still kinda’ heartbreaking. (9/10)
October 7th:
The Wolfman (1941)After seeing this multiple times now, I think I can say the “Vertigo”-style freak-out is my favorite scene. (8/10)
The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)There’s sincerity and almost sweetness about this campy predecessor to slashers films and modern torture horror. (8/10)
Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman (1943)
I would’ve preferred a solo Wolfman sequel because the Frankenstein aspect seems a little forced in and Lugosi was a lousy monster. Still, you can’t fault the fun factor of the very first monster mash. (7/10)
October 09:
Old pal JD picked out this night’s viewing, two flicks he's been wanting to see for a while but hadn't gotten around to yet. Thus the slightly unsensonal choices.
Shock Treatment (1981)
I remember this movie being less bad last time I watched it, but I still like the music. (6/10)
My Bloody Valentine (1981): Extended Cut
The nasty gore is what people remember but this essential retro-slasher has also got a lovable cast of characters. (7/10)
Come back next week for more fun!
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Director Report Card: Lucky McKee (2006-2008)
3. The WoodsWhen “The Woods” first came out, I was disappointed. I found the story to be overly vague. I found it lacking in the intense visual style of “May” and generally paling in comparison to that film. Perhaps I was predestined to have a low opinion after such a great debut. That the movie sat on a shelf for over a year certainly didn’t help any preconceived notions.
Re-watching it now a few years removed from my initial anticipation, my view is more positive. “The Woods” still isn’t a great picture but it does manage to bring the creepy several times throughout its runtime. It has often been compared to “Suspiria.” That’s apt. We all ready know Lucky is an Argento fan and the witches/isolated girls school combo is a deliberate reference. More then anything else, it’s the sound design that recalls Dario’s often touted classic. There aren’t any swirling Goblin synth but creepy, whispered voices (provided by none other then Angela Bettis) fill out the background sounds. “Witch!” is even shouted once. The music, with its female crooning, also helps the feel. (Who knew Lesley Gore could be spooky?)
To say that Lucky has lost his style by transferring to a bigger studio was wrong. It’s his style that provides the movie with the atmosphere it has. The shadows of the woods and the school’s hallways give off an unsettling vibe. The music hall, in particular, is awfully moody. The big finale, which also recalls “Suspiria,” proves to be the spookiest bit in the movie as the past, present and some gross gore come at us in quick succession. One of my preliminary issues was the story seemed to have a lot of mysterious things planned but left most of these threads unexplained. Reevaluating now, I find a lot more is explained then I’d realized. All the puzzle pieces are presented and it’s up to the audience to put it together.
When the movie is focusing on creepy shadows and paranoid conspiracies, it’s relatively successful. When the CGI tree monsters start to attack, that’s not so successful. The attack that leads to the climax almost works but the other two tree sequences, in particular the one involving the cop, fall laughably flat.The cast is solid enough. Agnes Bruckner is a likable lead, Patricia Clarkson underplays a little bit but has a few moments, Lauren Birkell and Rachel Nichols do well in their respective parts of best friend and queen bitch. And Bruce Campbell, god bless him, actually acts this time, expanding pass his Ash persona to play a worried, pushover Daddy, before picking up an axe again at story’s end. It’s one of his best performances.
Ultimately, my biggest problem with “The Woods” remains. Against “May,” a layered, powerful, personal horror picture, “The Woods” seems thin in comparison. It’s an atmospheric dark fairy tale without much more to say beyond a few fun lesbian undertones. (It’s a McKee film, after all.) Good to watch but never a big favorite. [Grade: B]
4. Red (with Trygve Allister Diesen)“Red” was a very troubled production. Lucky McKee, obviously a big fan of author Jack Ketchum after producing the adaptation of “The Lost,” has been wanting to make the movie for years. Things eventually came together with a great cast and everything seemed to be going well. And then, after more then half of the movie was shot, Lucky was fired. Nobody involved with the decision seems interested in saying why he was let go. Either way, about a year later an unknown Swedish director named Trygve Diesen was brought on to finish up the movie. In the end, both directors were given credit. Nobody has seen anything Diesen has done before this, but he seems confident. You certainly can’t tell that this is the product of two different directors.
I’m a fan of Ketchum and “Red,” despite being a fairly simplistic morality play, is probably my favorite writing of his, out of what I’ve read. The old adage of the movie never being as good as the book proves true but it seems silly to criticize the differences in media. The movie is very faithful, only cutting out a few characters and removing an unnecessary romantic subplot.
The biggest coup here is Brian Cox in the lead. Mr. Cox is a great character actor and too rarely given a lead role. He’s perfectly cast as Avery Ludlow, an old man who has lost a lot in his life and is only asking for those who have cause his pain to own up to it. Cox is quiet and his blue eyes convey a lot of sorrow. Halfway through the movie, Cox delivers a deeply affecting monologue. Instead of cutting to a flashback, the movie wisely decides to focuses in on his face as he tells his sad tale. None of the other characters are as developed as Ludlow but there is still some talent in the cast. Kyle Gallner is the best of the supporting turns, while Tom Sizemore plays his typical asshole part and Robert Englund and Amanda Plummer stop by for cameos. Kim Dickens is good enough but I would have preferred to have seen what Angela Bettis, who was originally cast in the part, could have done with the role.
The direction is low key, lacking some of the stylistic flourish of McKee’s past films, but it goes with the quiet tone. Dogs are a reoccurring symbol here, representing kindness and unconditional love in comparison to the senseless cruelty and ignorance of mankind. I also like the fades to red that are used a few times.The finale probably should have been more suspenseful. I do love the resolution, which nicely shows how hope springs eternal. “Red” is a quiet and thoughtful production, more of a drama then a thriller, with a great lead performance and some resonating concepts at its center. [Grade: B]
So, what's Lucky been up to recently? Well, he made a short for X-Box Live along with a bunch of other neat directors. I haven't seen it because I don't have a fucking X-Box 360. Beyond that, it's kinda' quiet. He's been linked to both a remake of "Fiend Without a Face" and an adaptation of Brian Harper's novel "Shiver," but nothing's come of those yet. He is supposedly writing something for Chris Sivertson called "Hippy" that was starring Lindsay Lohan at one point. I'm not sure if that's actually getting made. Whatever he does next, I'm probably going to support and watch it. You should too!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Director Report Card: Lucky McKee (2001-2002)
Lucky McKee is the best filmmaker to come out of the horror boom earlier this decade. I'm a massive, massive nerd for everything he's done. Needless to say, this report card will be filled with even more endless rambling then usual.
1. All Cheerleaders Die (with Chris Sivertson)I shouldn’t even be watching “All Cheerleaders Die.” It’s never been given an official home video release and is only owned by cast/crew members. If you’re watching it, chances are you bought a gray market release and are a dirty, dirty, thief and should feel awful about yourself. Ahem.
Anyway, this is something Lucky and his pal Chris Sivertson (The madman responsible for the underrated “The Lost” and the much better then you’ve heard “I Know Who Killed Me.” Not to mention the “Jack and Jill” short in “May.”) threw together for fun. In the sea of shot-on-video garbage out there, the movie certainly stands out. Yes, the production values are as low as you’d expect. None of the gore is all that convincing and there are numerous unintentional lens flares. (At least the filmmakers knew better then to attempt any day-for-night shots.) The whole thing is pretty low rent and gritty. It’s jarring at first but once you get use to the aesthetic, you might find a pretty entertaining little flick.
Not all of the acting is of high quality, Shelli Merril and her unconvincing accent is especially embarrassing and Jesse Hlubik is the only half-way convincing football player, but most of the performances are acceptable, with some of them even being good with some nice, subtle physical details. There’s plenty of pot smoking throughout, even a “Doobie Count” at the end of the credits, but no nudity as Joe Bob Briggs is quick to point out. The one sex scene is shot extremely awkwardly. It’s pretty clear no one was comfortable with that.
The premise of boys and girls going against each other proves that even in these humble beginnings, McKee had more on his mind then just mindless carnage. When the cheerleaders come out on top, the guys loose it. Violence follows, as does a legitimately shocking bear trap gag. The scene cuts to five years later, something I thought was a mistake at first, but before you know it, the zombies are out of their graves and full-blown chaos erupts. It’s pretty clear that any thoughts on gender theory have been tossed aside when the gut munching commences. But, hey, when you got a motorcycles going into a lake, disembowelments, high school reunion massacres, and the big tree-branch French kissing scene, who can complain?Yes, the zombie make-up isn’t very good and the “Evil Dead” inspired stick attack is really bad, but stuff flies by at such a frantic, manic, fun, pace, you can’t stop to focus on the shortcomings. Honestly, when isn’t zombie carnage set to death metal awesome? The movie is very short, minus the ten minute joke-ridden credits, so it certainly doesn’t overstay its welcome and the ending is even sort of touching. With actors credited as Peckawood and Dirty Ernie, “All Cheerleaders Die” feels like an extended in-joke and has continued to be. It’s a treat for the director’s fans and horror buffs who can really handle low budgets will probably enjoy it too. [Grade: B]
2. May Oh boy. What to say about “May?” “Watching this movie is like slipping on a comfortable pair of old slippers?” “It’s like Argento with a heart?” Some other magazine friendly by-line? No, no. I love this movie. I love it like a spouse. If it was a person, I would want to marry it, go everywhere with it, make sweet sweet love to it, so on.
When I first saw “May” it touched me on a deeply personal level. Maybe more then I should be proud of, I saw a great deal of myself up on the screen. It seems to me, what Lucky McKee did here, was, without fear, cast all the awkwardness, humiliation, and hurt of being an outcast up on the screen. He gives voice to any number of deep personal pains. He brings them to life literally before bringing them into existence in a pure, bloody, visceral way. There really isn’t any more I can say about that without just dissolving into totally incomprehensible fan-drooling.
So, what else? The movie is really pretty to look out. The use of color is brilliant and each one of the frames has an amazing depth to them. The two combine to create a singular visual fingerprint that, even if the movie had nothing else, cements “May” as a horror classic.
But it has everything else. It feels almost redundant by this point to laud Angela Bettis. But I’ll do it anyway. She’s really uncontrollably essential, all encompassing great. I love you, Angela. You’re beautiful, you’re amazing, you make May into a human being. Not just a great character, but a real person. I really can’t heap enough praise onto her for this performance. The rest of the cast is pretty good. Anna Farris, she of the increasingly weak low brawl comedies, is really sexy, a stereotypical lipstick lesbian, but alluring none the less. Jeremy Sisto is good too, giving Adam a number of angles. James Duvall, he of the indie film cred, has a hilarious small part. (“You wanna’ get some Jujubees with me?” is the best line in the movie.)
The music, by indie singer Jaye Barnes Luckett, is fantastic, incredibly moody, a mixture of very creepy choir music and emotional rock songs. This is a good example of a film that wouldn’t have been nearly as successful without the music.
Okay, enough of the functional criticism and review. I’ve seen the movie many times, obviously, and every time I notice something new. The movie is rife with symbols. Not necessarily symbols in the sense that they mean something to the world at large, but in a deep Jung-ian way. May is a fetishist. She obsesses over tiny, individual things. The big things, the body parts she latches on to, or the small things. They are many repeated images here that you might only catch on repeat viewings and, despite the temptation to do so, I won’t reveal them. (Broken glass, cigarettes, limbs, toy knives, showers, fabric, dolls… Oh poo, I ruined it.) The movie’s funny too, with most of the humor coming from the great, memorable dialogue.Oh, I haven’t talked about the dolls yet! Soozy, May’s best friend, a doll encased in glass, is a character onto herself. It never comes alive, it doesn’t have to. It’s creepier just staring. And maybe the cracking glass isn’t the most subtle metaphor but the movie makes it work, especially the sound more then anything else. Soozy leads to one of the most iconic horror moments in the movie. If all the, you know, talking and thinking and such turns off the crazy gorehound horror fans, they’ll at least remember the scene people who have seen the movie know what I’m talking about.
A common criticism waged against the movie is May’s evolution from painfully shy lonely nerd to serial killer. A sudden character shift might be appropriate, considering the mind breaking events that proceeded, but I don’t think that was the intention. Especially after May returns to her apartment afterwards, where she resorts to her normal personality. When her Halloween costume goes on, she becomes Soozy, of course. May assumes a persona, to allow her to do what she must. And the ending, a point of debate for some. I’d say its one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. I wouldn’t have it any other way. (There’s a key to understanding the final scene. Earlier, Polly gives a throw-away line, “It’s our imperfections that make us special.” You’ll get it now if you didn’t all ready.)Okay, so I guess I should point out some imperfections here. I can stand back and see that, maybe, the movie tries to be a little too quirky for its own good, especially earlier on. My one real problem is the opening scene. Though it’s probably a great idea to open a horror movie with a screaming woman, I feel it shows too much, too early. I’ve rambled long enough. “May” is the best horror of the last ten years and one of my all-time favorites. [Grade: A]
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Review: Delightful Water Universe (2009)

So, it’s 2009, and what has Trent Harris been up to all this time? Well, some documentary shorts have been made, some books written. The last thing I saw with his name on it were a few video/music collages done for the “Hearing Voices” website. (A few of which are on the YouTube.) And then, seemingly out of nowhere, “Delightful Water Universe” crops up.
What to say of it? Well, first off, Harris fans (How many of us are out there?) will probably go ga-ga over it. What will everyone else think? Who cares! Right out of gate, the movie inundates us with his unique brand of weirdness. The movie claims to be based on true events that will take place in the future. From here, we are reintroduced to the director’s trademarks. Plenty of funny, quotable dialogue, most of it in the form of obtuse insults, are on display here. (The writer/director can’t take credit for the highly amusing real Dan Quyale quotes that are trotted out a few times.) Perhaps more important is the odd story which involves a number of things, such as a dark future where corporations own everything and Bigfoot controls our thoughts with a hat made of windshield wipers. A vast conspiracy threatens to unleash the Delightful Water Universe on the world, enslaving us all to prime-time television.
Or is it? Perhaps the whole thing is just the incoherent ramblings of a nut locked up in an asylum, besieged on all sides by paranoid beliefs and delusions, and an apparent Burning Man festival going on just outside his walls.
Off-beat obviously but the movie is not as immediately accessible as some of Harris’ previous work. The whole thing is set up as a novel, leading to a heavy use of voiceover narration. Initially, it’s slightly off-putting and takes some getting use to. Also, one of the running jokes here, is that a lot of the big action takes place off-screen. Some times things are just described to us, more often we are presented with blindly artful montages. The best sequence in the film is such a scene standing in place of a wild sex scene. Instead of the hot action, we see the characters doing odd dances all set to infectious electronic music. (Also apparently composed by Harris. What doesn’t that guy do?) Though certainly a response to the paltry budget, this ends up working very well. These are moments of pure art tossed into the middle of the movie that somehow not manages to sidetrack or derail the momentum of the story. The other montages composed of old stock footage are less successful though no less hypnotic. And the long bits of underwear clad hotties seem slightly out of the place, even if it makes sense. (The movie has an overall sense of sad horniness, which it actually ends up justifying before the conclusion.)
Bill Allred isn’t buyable as a lady’s man, a joke the movie is in on, but is an amusing, easy to hang out with lead. Stefene Russell resurfaces for the first time since “Plan 10 from Outer Space” and shows the same sort of easy charm she did in that film, even if her Elmer Fudd lisp growls old by the end. However, it’s Dan Morley that gives the best performance, captivating in his derangement as the captured author that is writing the story we’re watching.
As much as I’d like to proclaim it as, “Delightful Water Universe” isn’t a full-fledged obscure weird classics like “Rubin and Ed.” The movie doesn’t really have an ending and instead just sort of circles out of logic before finishing up. Neither of the stories present have a proper conclusion and I can’t help but wonder if funding ran out or something. But still, there’s an emotional completeness here. Even if some things are left up in the air, the characters arrive at a better place then they began. The DVD case proclaims “Delightful Water Universe” as about heroic misfits, for heroic misfits. Truthful, as always. Not perfect but too infectiously quirky not to embrace, it sits proud among the rest of Trent Harris’ filmography. I mean, hell, it’s got a random musical number. You can’t resist the charms, it’ll make you as happy as a clam. [Grade: A-]
What to say of it? Well, first off, Harris fans (How many of us are out there?) will probably go ga-ga over it. What will everyone else think? Who cares! Right out of gate, the movie inundates us with his unique brand of weirdness. The movie claims to be based on true events that will take place in the future. From here, we are reintroduced to the director’s trademarks. Plenty of funny, quotable dialogue, most of it in the form of obtuse insults, are on display here. (The writer/director can’t take credit for the highly amusing real Dan Quyale quotes that are trotted out a few times.) Perhaps more important is the odd story which involves a number of things, such as a dark future where corporations own everything and Bigfoot controls our thoughts with a hat made of windshield wipers. A vast conspiracy threatens to unleash the Delightful Water Universe on the world, enslaving us all to prime-time television.
Or is it? Perhaps the whole thing is just the incoherent ramblings of a nut locked up in an asylum, besieged on all sides by paranoid beliefs and delusions, and an apparent Burning Man festival going on just outside his walls.Off-beat obviously but the movie is not as immediately accessible as some of Harris’ previous work. The whole thing is set up as a novel, leading to a heavy use of voiceover narration. Initially, it’s slightly off-putting and takes some getting use to. Also, one of the running jokes here, is that a lot of the big action takes place off-screen. Some times things are just described to us, more often we are presented with blindly artful montages. The best sequence in the film is such a scene standing in place of a wild sex scene. Instead of the hot action, we see the characters doing odd dances all set to infectious electronic music. (Also apparently composed by Harris. What doesn’t that guy do?) Though certainly a response to the paltry budget, this ends up working very well. These are moments of pure art tossed into the middle of the movie that somehow not manages to sidetrack or derail the momentum of the story. The other montages composed of old stock footage are less successful though no less hypnotic. And the long bits of underwear clad hotties seem slightly out of the place, even if it makes sense. (The movie has an overall sense of sad horniness, which it actually ends up justifying before the conclusion.)
Bill Allred isn’t buyable as a lady’s man, a joke the movie is in on, but is an amusing, easy to hang out with lead. Stefene Russell resurfaces for the first time since “Plan 10 from Outer Space” and shows the same sort of easy charm she did in that film, even if her Elmer Fudd lisp growls old by the end. However, it’s Dan Morley that gives the best performance, captivating in his derangement as the captured author that is writing the story we’re watching.
As much as I’d like to proclaim it as, “Delightful Water Universe” isn’t a full-fledged obscure weird classics like “Rubin and Ed.” The movie doesn’t really have an ending and instead just sort of circles out of logic before finishing up. Neither of the stories present have a proper conclusion and I can’t help but wonder if funding ran out or something. But still, there’s an emotional completeness here. Even if some things are left up in the air, the characters arrive at a better place then they began. The DVD case proclaims “Delightful Water Universe” as about heroic misfits, for heroic misfits. Truthful, as always. Not perfect but too infectiously quirky not to embrace, it sits proud among the rest of Trent Harris’ filmography. I mean, hell, it’s got a random musical number. You can’t resist the charms, it’ll make you as happy as a clam. [Grade: A-]
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