Halloween 2023: October 29th

Five Nights at Freddy's (2023)

In 2013, unsuccessful Christian game designer Scott Cawthon released "Chipper & Sons Lumber Co." The game was poorly received, with the few who did play it saying the characters were unintentionally creepy and moved like old Chuck E. Cheese's animatronics. Cawthon decided to lean into this with his next release, creating a horror game that featured intentionally creepy animatronics characters. The result, "Five Nights at Freddy's," became an immediate phenomenon, especially with kids. Bolstered by a litany of YouTube reaction videos, the game soon spawned multiple sequels, spin-offs, an obsessive fandom, and a metric fuck-ton of merchandise. Obviously, Hollywood came knocking after that. A film version was announced in 2015, with Blumhouse coming on-board in 2017. After several years in development, filming moved forward with "The Wind's" Emma Tammi directing. The cinematic "Five Nights at Freddy's" reached theaters in time for Halloween of this year, to rabid anticipation from fans and general bafflement from everyone else.

As as a child, Mike Schmidt's brother was kidnapped and presumably murdered by an unknown man. The incident haunts him still and he has reoccurring dreams about it. As an adult, Mike is the caretaker of his younger sister, Abby. Threatened with losing custody of her, Mike takes the only job he can get: a nighttime security gig at an abandoned restaurant/arcade called Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria. Mike soon discovers that Freddy's is at the center of an unsolved series of child murders from the eighties. Also, the restaurant's rickety animatronic animal band spring to life at night, attacking anyone they deem an intruder. His dreams about his brother intensifying, Mike soon realizes he has to unravel the mystery at Freddy's if he hopes to keep Abby safe. 

I've never actually played any of the "Freddy's" games and am not that familiar with the series. But my girlfriend is a fan, so I've picked up on a few things over the years. I know this universe has quite an elaborate, convoluted backstory. The greatest weakness of the film adaptation is how the script — co-written between Cawthon, Tammi, and "Tragedy Girls" filmmaker Tyler MacIntire — tries to squeeze in as much of that lore as possible. There's often long stops in the pacing devoted to explaining something or setting up a plot device for later use. One character in particular, a beat cop named Vanessa with seemingly nothing else to do, exists primarily to dump expositionary monologues. I guess this is inevitable when you are adapting a game series that delivers it's story more through background details than a forward narrative. The result is a movie that is quite awkwardly paced. Freddy Fazbear doesn't even appear until about forty minutes into the film, with long stretches of the story taking place away from the abandoned pizza parlor. Seems to me that the isolation and atmosphere of its setting is mostly what made the games scary but the movie doubles-down on narrative instead. 

Yet, when the "Five Nights at Freddy's" movie gets out of its own way, it can be effective. I was skeptical if the cute, highly toyetic animatronics could actually be made scary. The fact that I find Freddy and the gang are so goofy looking has been the main roadblock to me getting into this series. Yet the film does occasionally pull it off. The moments when the machines move off-camera, glaring suddenly into the security camera, or their eyes softly glow in the dark, actually work for me. The highlight of the film is a sequence where some intruders enter the parlor and are picked off one-by-one. This is the moment when "Five Nights" feels the most like a throwback slasher movie, devoted to the ol' stalk-and-slash. And it works, largely because the excellent creature effects add a realistic heft and weight to the robots and because the dilapidated setting can genuinely be eerie at times. 

However, "Freddy's" is a franchise mostly beloved by children. You can feel the movie frequently pulling back on the scariness and gore. Which makes the more violent scenes feel tonally out-of-place. But I'm not sure that tonal consistency was a big concern here. The film indecisively dangles the animatronics in-between being figures of fear and misunderstood softies. A long sequence in the middle features the heroes playfully interaction with the robots, even including some broad physical comedy. Moments like this is what most reminds me that this is a movie for eight-year-olds. Eventually, the film decides Freddy and the gang are dangerous monsters with sympathetic origins. Yet that uncertainty does hang in the air, over whether we are supposed to be afraid of the robots or want to give them big hugs. 

I have no idea if Emma Tammi is a "Five Nights" fan girl. I would guess so, as the film feels chained to fan expectations and respect for canon. Yet I do think Tammi makes an overall good-looking movie. The cinematography is solid, with a slow zoom into the neon sign outside the establishment being the coolest moment. The production design is strong, with the derelict location feeling fittingly unkept. The cast is decent. Josh Hutcherson is a serviceable lead, Piper Rubio is cute as the little sister, and Matthew Lillard is fittingly off-beat in a key role. Really, the only time "Freddy's" really made me roll my eyes are during the extensive dream sequences. It's an ungainly plot point. The ghost kids element falls into all the clichés of that troupe that I find goofy and insufferable. Then again, Tammi's "The Wind" worked best when emphasizing atmosphere and isolation, over its limp attempts at jump scares and horror stereotypes, so this seems to be a re-occuring trend for her. 

Ultimately, I feel like "Five Nights at Freddy's" probably would've been a far more effective horror movie if it simply went back to the premise of the original game: A guy, forced into this situation by economic pressures, alone in a building with wandering robots that want to kill him. However, that's really not what the "Freddy's" is. Instead, it's made to please longtime fans that expect to see certain things and have their beloved mythology honored. (Such as jarring cameos from YouTubers.) I guess that's what big budget adaptations are in this very online world of ours. Still, I didn't hate "Five Nights at Freddy's." In fact, I think it's almost a good movie. Once it gets through a bumpy first half, this turns into a solidly amusing monster movie for kids. Considering the track record of video game movies and the niche aspects of the source material, it could've been a lot worse and altogether more inaccessible. Maybe this is the best we could've expected from a movie about murderous, singing pizza robots. [6/10]

The Mask (1961)

When I think of exploitation and horror films made by our brothers to the north, my mind immediately goes to the likes of David Cronenberg, Ivan Reitman, and Bob Clark. However, the story of Canuxploitation go back much further than that. Canada has had its own, small film industry since the early days of the art form. It wasn't until the fifties that Canadian producers became interested in producing films for other markets, made in their own country. As far as every source I've read knows, 1961's “The Mask” is the first horror made entirely in Canada by a Canadian crew. The film would be picked up for U.S. distribution by Warner Brothers, making “The Mask” also among the first Canadian films to reach a wide audience. Nowadays, the film is regarded as not just a historical artifact but an oddball cult favorite. 

Psychologist Dr. Allen Barnes has a distressing visit with his patient, Michael. The man complains of murderous dreams and mentions feeling powerless against some force. That night, Michael commits suicide. Shortly afterwards, a package arrives at Barnes' office. Inside, is a skull-shaped, tribal mask used by the Aztecs during rituals of human sacrifice. Barnes feels compelled to put the mask on and, when he does, has vivid visions. He quickly becomes addicted to the mask's powers and finds himself driven to murder. Allen's girlfriend and partners try to intervene, while a detective investigates the killings. 

From the first interaction between Dr. Barnes and his disturbed patient, it's clear that “The Mask” is operating on a heightened level of reality. The performances are stilted and stage-like. The actors tend to say everything they are feeling at any given moment. This becomes especially evident when it becomes clear what “The Mask” is about. After putting the mask on for the first time, Dr. Barnes is immediately addicted to it. His girlfriend recognizes a change in his behavior and appearance right away. It seems, mere hours after using the mask for the first time, Allen has changed from an upward member of society to a desperate junkie. That includes perpetual five o'clock shadow sprouting up on his face. The film features scenes of Allen's girlfriend asking him to choose between her and the mask and his friends and family coming together to beg him to stop. Allen even says he can quit any time he wants, he just doesn't want too. Ultimately, “The Mask” is a highly melodramatic anti-drug metaphor that's about as subtle as that implies.  

And what kind of drug does the mask most resemble? Probably some sort of powerful hallucinogenic. When Allen wears the mask, he's greeted to bizarre visions. He sees the mask – sometimes floating on its own, sometimes worn by a woman, sometimes worn by a corpse – throwing fireballs in his face. He sees zombies and ghouls lunging at him, in vaguely temple like sets that are thick with fog. One particularly vivid sequence has him floating down a Styx-like river, led by a rotten-faced ferryman. It's all pretty crazy stuff. Some of the images, like snakes emerging from a cadaver's eye sockets or a pair of gloved hands floating above a sofa, are even somewhat creepy. That everyone in these fantasy sequences wear masks of different sorts further lends an air of unreality to the proceedings. 

What makes these hallucinations all the more vivid is that they are in color, while the rest of “The Mask” is in black-and-white. That is where the film's central gimmick emerges: These trip scenes were originally presented in 3D. (Making “The Mask” Canada's first 3D movie too.) Each time Allen is compelled to wear the mask, a voice booms out to “PUT ON THE MASK,” which was an order to audience members to put on their 3-D glasses. One presumes that most of “The Mask's” budget was spent on these sequences and the 3-D technology necessary to film them. This probably explains why the rest of the movie is so dull. Oh, there's some cool, black-and-white photography. But far too much of “The Mask's” non-trip sequences are devoted to people standing around in plain rooms, having very dry conversations. 

That is the zone “The Mask” resides in. The film slingshots between delightfully nuts fantasy scenes and dull, overly dramatic grounded sequences. Whether the former is worth sitting through for the latter is a matter of opinion. I'm sure “The Mask” is a blast to watch on a big screen, in 3-D, where its fantasy sequences can really be enjoyed at their full potency. Watching at home and flat, it's a frequently slow experience broken up by fantastically surreal moments. If nothing else, it's a defiantly quirky note for the legacy of Canuxploitation to begin with. [6/10]

50 States of Fright: Almost There

Earlier this year, when studios started performing the incredibly scummy move of removing content from streaming services to cut costs, Roku yanked all the content they acquired from the long-since-dead Quibi. This meant promising horror anthology series “50 States of Fright” is now totally unavailable through any legal means. But everything survives in the world of internet piracy. If producers are going to screw over artists just to save a few bucks, then stealing stuff becomes the only way to appreciate certain programs. I enjoyed the previous two episodes of “50 States of Fright” I watched, so decided to look at the Iowa set episode, “Almost There.”

Written and directed by Scott Beck and Bryan Woods – forever categorized in my brain as the “A Quiet Place” guys – “Almost There” starts Taissa Farmiga as Hannah. A young engineer, Hannah is still haunted by memories of her Amish mother, who killed herself and Hannah's sisters by dropping them in front of a moving train. Hannah receives a phone call in the middle of the night from Blake, a mechanic working on a wind turbine. A fire in the control room means the turbine might collapse, forcing Hannah and Blake to ascend the massive structure. This means Hannah must confront her fear of heights and the ghosts from her past. 

When you add “Almost There's'” three parts together, it runs about the length of a normal TV episode. Yet, since “50 States of Fright” was made for Quibi's “quick bites” format, that means it has to establish its story fast. This actually works really well, as it means “Almost There” doesn't waste any time detailing Hannah's past trauma and getting us right into the action. From the opening minutes, we know why Hannah is haunted, why she fears heights, and that she'll have to confront both of them to do her job and save the day. That Farmiga is good at immediately gaining audience sympathy, and establishing a can-do attitude, makes “Almost There” all the more compelling right out of the gate.

“Almost There” also has a hell of a setting. Most of the episode is devoted to a Hannah and Blake climbing up the practically endless ladder in the middle of the turbine. This generates tension right away, as the audience is dangling right alongside the characters over a great height. When things inevitably go right, whether that's from a falling tool or the lights going out, you can't help but flinch. All the more-so when they are accompanied by a grisly sight of a breaking bone. Yet Beck and Woods, following the same formula laid out in their “Haunt,” do give Hannah a triumphant ending... Only after a last minute jump scare and action-packed climax, that admittedly got me. In other words, “Almost There” is pretty good! I wish it was actually available through legal means now and that its creators could be paid for their work. [7/10]

Backwoods (2019)

Here's another more recent short included in Severin's folk horror box set. A fairly close adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft's “The Picture in the House,” the short follows a genealogist traveling through the New England backwoods. After a storm rolls in, he takes shelter in a seemingly unoccupied house. However, he soon discovers that the desolate location does contain one resident: An old man with a long, gray beard and a strange accent. He shows the traveler a very old book. Though the man is illiterate, he still looks at the pictures with rapt attention. These etchings concern cannibalism and arcane rituals. As the man goes on about the particular hunger the images stir in him, the traveler realizes he is in danger.

If you're going to watch “Backwoods,” it will probably help you to read the Lovecraft story first. Ryan Mackfall's short keeps things as vague as possible. The protagonist has no name and the details of why he's in this place or what he's doing are never expounded on. We don't even see the old man's face until the very end. The man's peculiar accent is so thick that it's often tricky to understand what he's saying. The film ditches the deus ex machina ending of Lovecraft's story but doesn't come up with an alternative. Instead, “Backwoods” just kind of stops. What happens to the characters next is certainly heavily implied but it's all up to audience guess work to decide where things actually conclude here. 

What “Backwoods” lacks in clear narrative, it makes up for in atmosphere. The production design and cinematography is very good, quickly establishing a dreary and overcast ambiance. The set-up, of being stuck in an isolated house with a weird old man, does create a certain tension in the viewer. Combining the man's rantings with visual flashbacks weren't necessary, as the briefly glimpsed obscene images in the book tell us all we need to know. It's clear that Mackfall and his team are quite talented and even capable of creating a spooky feeling. Still, “Backwoods” would be better served by actually having an ending. [5/10]