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Showing posts with label christmas 2022. Show all posts
Showing posts with label christmas 2022. Show all posts

Saturday, December 24, 2022

CHRISTMAS 2022: The Leech (2022)


Let us consider the career of Jeremy Gardner. As a director, Gardner made low budget zombie fave “The Battery” and quirky creature feature “After Midnight.” As an actor, he's appeared in films from indie horror auteurs like Benson and Moorehead, Mickey Keating, and the aforementioned Joe Begos. (In fact, he even popped up in “Christmas Bloody Christmas.”) He also appeared in “Sadistic Intentions,” a film from director Eric Pennycoff. I haven't seen that one or even heard of it before. Yet I felt compelled to check out “The Leech,” Pennycoff's follow-up, anyway. Perhaps that's because I like Garnder or maybe it's just because it's a Christmas-set horror movie that's not about Santa or the Krampus or anything like that. It's nice to have some variety in the holiday horror genre.

Catholic priest David leads a congregation of exactly one, with his assistant Rigo seemingly being the only person who attends his church at all. On the way home from another practically empty sermon, David meets Terry. Following an argument with his girlfriend, the foul-mouthed Terry is facing homelessness. David decides to take the man in, despite his obnoxious habits and vulgar opinions. It's almost Christmas after all. Soon afterwards, Terry reconciles with Lexi, his girlfriend. She moves into David's house too. As the holiday draws closer, David finds his capacity for forgiveness and charity tested by his increasingly depraved house guests. They'll continue to challenge the priest's resolve, pushing him further to the edge of sanity.

“The Leech” has a clever set-up for a dark comedy that quickly pushes towards horror. David endeavors to live his life like Christ. He wants to help the helpless and is happy to invite Terry, someone who has fallen on hard luck, into his home. Yet this is a house guest that quickly pushes the limits of Christian charity. It’s an easy story to relate to, of wanting to help someone but also wanting to protect your own sanity. Most of us have experiences with guests that have overstayed their welcome and “The Leech” pushes that as far as possible. Terry refuses to respect boundaries, blaring heavy metal throughout the day and night, constantly swearing, and seemingly delighting in exposing the priestly David to drugs, alcohol, and sexual acts. Under these circumstances, we’d all crack eventually. 

This puts us in David’s corner. Clearly, Terry and Lexi are the villains in this scenario, right? Yet “The Leech” has a nice layer of ambiguity to it, by slowly revealing that David is not all he appears to be. There’s a suggestion that his current puritan lifestyle was born out of a past as a partying homosexual. (Which the film nicely doesn’t explore too much, leaving the audience to wonder.) When the topic of Lexi being pregnant comes up, David goes on a disingenuous anti-abortion rant. After the house guests push him too far, David begins to enforce his own morality on them in creepy ways. Yes, he seems to have some hang-ups about his dead mother too. “The Leech” shows all of its central trio slipping into depravity and instability, making this more complex than just a story about uninvited guests driving you nuts. 

David does get driven nuts though. He slips more and more into madness as “The Leech” goes on, the film getting more hallucinatory as the violence and embittered speeches get more intense. Pennycoff’s direction is strong during these moments. He makes good use of Christmas lights for mood coloring and has a good handle on dream logic. (Even if the cinematography is a bit too dark in general.) Yet “The Leech” does loose its footing some the more out there it gets. Luckily, the performances remain compelling. Graham Skipper has a pleasant avuncular quality as David. Watching his kind exterior slowly melt away towards bitterness and madness is rewarding. Jeremy Gardner goes amusingly over-the-top as Terry, clearly relishing a chance to play a character who disregards all tact and good taste. 

"The Leech" does have its fair share of Christmas atmosphere too, even if it's only tangentially about the holiday. The story of someone striving to be Christ-like during the holiest of seasons, and eventually failing spectacularly, touches on the meaning of the day more than most December films do. Coming in at a compact 87 minutes, "The Leech" doesn't overstay its welcome the way its characters do. It's an amusingly nasty dark comedy that satisfied my desire for a twisted spin on the Christmas holiday. [7/10]

Wednesday, December 21, 2022

CHRISTMAS 2022: Christmas Bloody Christmas (2022)


If you follow the independent horror scene, you've probably heard the name Joe Begos. Begos started to make a name for himself in 2013 with sci-fi slasher flick, “Almost Human.” By 2015's “The Mind's Eye,” his aesthetic started to emerge. Begos makes throwback horror flicks that are heavy on the gore, neon lighting, colorfully and profane dialogue, with soundtracks that alternate between synths and heavy metal. His movies are often frequent homages to Fangoria favorites of the past. “The Mind's Eye” was obviously inspired by “Scanners,” “VFW” clearly drew from “Assault on Precinct 13,” “Bliss” was his riff on “Driller Killer.” Unfortunately, I've yet to see a Begos movie I've actually liked, as I find his style to be self-indulgent and obnoxious. Yet when I read his next film was a seasonal slasher named “Christmas Bloody Christmas,” I knew I would once again take a chance on a Begos joint. 

Should we continue to discuss “Christmas Bloody Christmas,” we must accept the main facet of its premise: That military contractors have created highly advanced, humanoid robots for war-time operations and then, for some reason, re-purposed them as utterly life-like Santa Clauses for toy stores. One such robot is residing in a toy store, near the vinyl/video stores Tori and Robbie work at. On Christmas, they head out for a night of drinking and partying. That's when the Santa robot reverts back to its murderous programming. The machine goes on a killing spree, targeting Tori's friends before following her back to her sister's place. The ax-wielding mechanical Claus chases her to the police station afterwards, turning December 25th into a blood-soaked nightmare.

“Christmas Bloody Christmas” represents Joe Begos' style at its most self-indulgent. Nearly the entire first half-hour is devoted to Riley Dandy and Sam Delich, as Tori and Robbie, trading self-consciously vulgar dialogue. They talk about drinking, sex, music, and horror movies. To make sure the hardcore genre fans in the audience know Begos is One of Us, “Pet Sematary Two” and the Crypt-Keeper Christmas album are among the discussed topic. (Alongside oral sex, analingus, and Lemmy.) “Fuck” is seemingly every other word. Nearly the entire film is lit in neon and blurring metal and synth fill out the soundtrack. And, as in Begos' previous films, this is a blatant homage to a certified genre classic. In this case, it's “The Terminator,” which is obvious when the Robot Santa attacks a police station and then reveals a robotic skeleton under its human-like skin. 

Now, it's a matter of opinion whether you find any of the above charming. Personally, I mostly find it incredibly irritating. Dandy and Delich do not make these broad, loud characters endearing. The non-stop profanity is just another facet of their aggressively in-your-face personalities. Horror movies don't have to have likable characters but, when trying to raise tension or create thrills, it helps. When you don't care about whether these people live or die, it's hard to be too invested in anything that happens. This means “Christmas Bloody Christmas” is mostly one of those slasher flicks that's just about gory special effects. Sadly, those aren't too impressive here either. The robotic Santa mostly executes people with simple axe swings, the dismembered bodies and crushed heads looking very rubbery and fake. 

I can't help but feel like “Christmas Bloody Christmas” is not a film that's meant to be taken seriously. The robotic Santa premise is absurd, after all, and the plot is full of contrivances. The fake looking gore and loud-mouthed characters further suggests this is a horror/comedy of sorts.  Yet if that's the case, the film is never especially funny. Its horror sequence are largely grim and downbeat, including the death of a child. The second half is a relentless chase scene that goes on and on, the robotic Santa pursuing Tori until the final seconds of the movie. In fact, I was left wondering why it's a killer Santa movie at all. The murderous Claus doesn't do anything festive or seasonal, not even speaking a ho-ho-ho. For that matter, why is this a robot movie either when all the murders are done with an axe? A regular person can kill people with an axe! Aside from robotic sound effects, the killer looks and moves like a normal person throughout most of the film. Kind of defeats the purpose of the idea, don't you think?

In other words, “Christmas Bloody Christmas” feels like a half-assed attempt at yuletide mayhem  to me. It doesn't really utilize any of its defining gimmicks in meaningful ways. The story feels directionless and the pacing is meandering. Really, the entire film feels like an exercise in Joe Begos just putting random shit he likes into a movie, wrapped up around the loose theme of a Christmas slasher flick. And that's great, for Begos and the folks that share his enthusiasm for screaming fuck, debating the quality of horror sequels, and floppy fake body parts. I can't count myself among this crowd though. A lot of people seem to enjoy this one so to each their own. [5/10]

Tuesday, December 20, 2022

CHRISTMAS 2022: Violent Night (2022)


Subversive Christmas cinema continues to evolve. Killer Santa movies are a dime a dozen. Action movies setting their chaos around the holidays has long since been enshrined in the hall of cinematic clichés, thanks to a certain ever-debatable seasonal classic. Raunchy Yuletide comedies were having a moment for a while, though they’ve fallen a little out of favor recently. None of these premises are especially novel on their own… But a combination of all three? Now that’ll get some butts in seats. One imagines this was the thought process that got “Violent Night,” an action flick putting the literal, mythical Santa Claus in place of John McClane, the greenlight. The script would come from the team behind the likable "Sonic the Hedgehog" movies while Tommy Wirkola, an expert in snowbound carnage, was in the director's chair. I want to say that creative team piqued my interest but the truth is the premise of "Die Hard Starring Santa" would've been irresistibly trashy regardless of who made it. 

After a thousand years of delivering gifts, Santa Claus is feeling a little blue. The increasingly materialistic, cynical world has him considering hanging up his jingle bells for good. On what might be his final Christmas, he stops at the mansion of rich industrialist family, the Lightstones. That's when a group of vicious mercenaries, led by a villain calling himself Mr. Scrooge, set their plan to steal three hundred million dollars in intractable bills into action. The gunfire scares off Santa's reindeer, stranding him in the besieged home. That's when Santa gets in contact with Trudy, the youngest Lightstone who only wants her mom and dad to get back together. The two communicate as the not-so-jolly old elf embraces his violent past to save the family from the ruthless robbers. 

“Violent Night” comes to us from 87North Productions, the company founded by David Leitch.to expand the action empire he started with “John Wick.” Of course, Leitch also directed the second “Deadpool” movie. Tonally, this Santa slaughter flick is much closer to the comedic superhero saga than Keanu Reeves shooting a hundred guys in the face. “Violent Night” has a similar tendency to be too impressed with its own outrageousness at times. One of the first things that happens here is Santa Claus puking on someone's face. The extended members of the Lightstones family are all exaggerated terrible people who speak mostly in obnoxiously overwritten, profane dialogue. Some of the characters, such as the Mark Wahlberg-like fiancée or a crazed henchman played by Brendan Fletcher, are utterly cartoonish. Considering the premise here, I guess it was inevitable that “Violent Night” would go over-the-top but the movie is definitely trying too hard to be edgy at times, instead of just letting the ridiculousness of its concept play out on its own.

“Violent Night's” glib violence, colorful vulgarities, and in-your-face characters stand in stark contrast to the relationship at the center of the story. You see, Trudy Lightstone is an adorable little moppet. Her love of Christmas and belief in Santa are utterly sincere. It's her precious earnestness that thaws Santa's cynicism and makes him love Christmas again. “Violent Night” plays this story arc totally straight, with nary a wink. While I suppose the movie could be applauded for committing to its status as a heartwarming Christmas movie and an ultra-violent action movie, the two tones jive badly in my eyes. It's really hard to take any of the movie's sentimental sense seriously at all when the rest of it is so utterly sarcastic. 

Regardless of whatever bumpy tonal issues occur throughout “Violent Night,” the film is at its most entertaining when embracing its intended goals as a gleefully over-the-top action movie. The creative team definitely had the most fun when juxtaposing wholesome Christmas decorations and winter traditions with the most violent executions they could conceived. Tensile, Christmas lights, a tree topper, and a nutcracker are utilized as weapons. “Home Alone” is reprised as a grisly gore-comedy. Once Santa picks up ice skates and activates the snowblower, “Violent Night” truly lives up to its title. While the action theatrics aren't quite up to the heights of 87North productions like “Atomic Blonde” or “Nobody,” they are pretty damn cool. There's some theatrical flips, brutal collisions, and some balletic fisticuffs. Once the snowmobile chases and explosions kick in, Wirkola's handle on the action is especially sturdy. 

For such a particular take on Santa Claus, a very specific type of actor was required. David Harbour strikes the right balance. He's believably holly jolly in some regards, even if this Santa is clearly grouchier and more intoxicated than most. He's also a creditable action lead, a burly looking guy that is physically imposing in a fight. Harbour's comedic chops are fine too and he manages to get a few laughs. As the villainous Mr. Scrooge, John Leguizamo happily hams it up and makes a fitting foil. Leah Brady is adorable as Trudy, precocious but not syrupy. Many of the supporting cast members go way over the top. Beverly D'Angelo as the Lightstone matriarch is especially cartoony, with Cam Gigandet's buffoonish character and much the henchmen being similarly ridiculous. (Though I kind of like the Dolph Lundgren-like Andre Eriksen.) 

By the end, “Violent Night's” mixture of gory action and crude yuletide comedy had won me over. Once the movie focuses on the premise of “Die Hard starring Santa Claus,” it really finds its hyper-violent groove. The movie finds a compelling reason for why this Santa is such a capable fighter, one that hints at a wider mythology. The film has done pretty well at the box office, and 87North has shown an eagerness to turn their surprise hits into franchises, so a “Another Violent Night” doesn't seem totally improbable. Whether we see this hard-boiled Santa again, “Violent Night” is an amusingly ridiculous Christmas gift for action aficionados and fans of off-beat holiday spectacle. [7/10]

Monday, December 19, 2022

Director Report Card: James Gunn (2022)



Considering James Gunn has spent his entire career reclaiming disregarded bits of pop culture debris, like D-list superheroes and seventies AM radio hits, it's not surprising that he's a fan of the Christmas special. While the best holiday specials remain seasonal staples that are beloved across generations, most of them fade into obscurity after a few years. So, of course, Gunn likes them. When it was announced that the director would be creating a “Guardians of the Galaxy” holiday special for Disney+, with that very specific titling, it was widely assumed to be a homage to the most notorious of misbegotten seasonal entertainment. While one can only assume Life Day was on Gunn's mind, his “Holiday Special” has less unsubtitled Wookie language than expected. Instead, “The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special” features the same balance of flippant sci-fi antics and sincerity that powered the previous two “Guardians” features.

In the time since “Endgame,” the Guardians of the Galaxy have taken over the Collector's trading post at Knowhere. Still missing Gamora, Star-Lord's friends notice that he is a little glum. After learning that it is around Christmas time on Earth, Mantis and Drax decide to find the perfect gift for their friend. They travel to Earth in search of Quill's childhood hero: The actor Kevin Bacon, who is not enthused to be abducted by aliens. Yet it's all mostly a distraction, as Mantis is more concerned with revealing to Peter that she's also Ego's offspring and, therefore, his half-sister.

More than anything else, the “Guardians” holiday special is a display for Pom Klemintoff and Dave Bautista. The majority of the forty-four minute program revolves around Mantis and Drax having wacky adventures on Earth. The two performers get to really flex their comedic muscles, as they trade comedic dialogue about their Christmas plans and get drunk in what appears to be a Hollywood gay bar. Watching them argue over the holiday decorations they suddenly become attached to produces hearty laughs. Klemintoff's oddball delivery and Bautista's dry and blunt observations have been sharpened to a fine point by now, both clearly being comfortable with these absurd roles.

That the stars get to stretch their comedic muscles so much is fitting, as “Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special” is essentially a fish-out-water comedy. Half of its runtime is devoted to Mantis and Drax responding to Earth culture in humorous ways. Such as an encounter with Hollywood street performers, which seems to confirm that Go-Bots exist in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The truth is Mantis and Drax tend to be out of their element everywhere they go. These are the most socially awkward Guardians and pairing them together makes sense. Seeing the nearly indestructible but literal-minded Drax and the shy, ambiguously neurodivergent Mantis use their powers to get out of scuffled – a fun little action beat involving some cops or Mantis using her empathetic abilities to get a star map – are definite highlights. 

Much like the Christmas variety programs of old, a special guest star was recruited for this holiday special. Kevin Bacon – already a Gunn veteran, having appeared in “Super” – proves to be a good sport, playing a good natured version of himself that is ruthlessly mocked and terrorized throughout the narrative. The sequence where Mantis and Drax discover he's just an actor, before she uses her powers to make him assume various heroic identities, is another very funny sequence. Moreover, the experienced character actor playing himself and getting directly involved with this band of intergalactic misfits continues to show the way Gunn weaves pop culture into his stories, not as references for their own sake but to depict what they mean to his characters. Bacon's movies are another connection Peter Quill has to his long-gone childhood and his reaction here – horror that his friends trafficked a movie star for his Christmas special – shows how he's matured.

Truthfully though, the narrative really only occupies the first half of this short program. The second half provides what most people are probably looking for in a holiday special: Just getting to hang out with these characters. Gunn and his team makes sure to include cute moments for each of the Guardians, with Rocket and Nebula getting nice comedic beats of their own. The musical montage at the end of the special, largely devoted to everyone trading gifts, is surprisingly cozy and adorable. This rounded off with a poignant final scene, that shows that these intergalactic stories really are about family, those we make and those we find along the way. 

Unsurprisingly, this thing is packed with Christmas ambiance. Christmas decorations prove to be a minor plot point in the earthbound segments of the story. The second half features Knowhere totally decked out in colored lights, a reveal which is given the proper amount of awe. Yes, before the end, the irresistible sight of Groot being done up like a Christmas tree is featured. This special also convinced me that James Gunn and I share the same taste in holiday music. “The Fairy Tale of New York,” Low's “Just Like Christmas,” Julian Casablancas' “I Wish It Was Christmas Today,” and Fountains of Wayne's “I Want an Alien for Christmas” are some prominent needle drops here that are also on my personal holiday playlist. There's also two original Christmas songs, contributed by Old '97s in alien make-up, that are pretty catchy. 

Supposedly, the “Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special” acts as something of a bridge between the characters' previous appearance and their likely final bow in “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3.” This includes giving Cosmo, the telekinetic Russian space dog, a proper introduction. And a perfectly adorable voice, provided by Maria Bakalova whose deadpan accent pairs hilariously with Cosmo's typically dog-like behavior. I also like the brief flashbacks here, done in rotoscoped animation that reminds me of “Heavy Metal.” (Which is easy to imagine as an inspiration for Gunn's entire career.) While it's ultimately a fluffy trifle, “The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special” is well worth a fun, a funny and sweet little gift for fans of this particular corner of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. [Grade: B]

Friday, August 19, 2022

Director Report Card: Steven Spielberg (1991)


16. Hook

I suppose every film lover of a certain age and demeanor had a Steven Spielberg movie they watched over and over again as a kid. His movies are the kind almost tailor-made to capture the imagination of young movie nerds. I certainly saw “Jaws” as a youth and it probably changed my life but we didn’t own it on VHS when I was a young kid. “Jurassic Park” scared the crap out of me as a little guy, making me unwilling to return to it for many years. While I revisited “E.T.” and the “Indiana Jones” movies plenty, I ultimately can't say that the Spielberg movie young Zack watched the most was one of the “cool” ones. No, my childhood favorite was “Hook.” For reasons I shall attempt to uncover soon enough, I watched this one incessantly as a youngster. Seemingly, the film was a childhood fave of a lot of other people too, leading to a divisive, love-it-or-hate-it reputation. Some consider it one of Spielberg’s worst films, some say it’s one of his best. Let’s see where I lie.

It almost goes without saying that Steven Spielberg had a fascination with Peter Pan from childhood. The clues were all over his early films: The child-like sense of wonder he held onto well into adulthood, the reoccurring imagery of flying. You see shadows of Captain Hook's pirate ship in “Jaws” and of the Lost Boys in “E.T.” Inevitably, Spielberg would begin to develop a new film based on “Peter Pan” in the early eighties. At one point, it was rumored to be a musical produced by Disney and starring Michael Jackson. Pre-production had begun in 1985 when the birth of Spielberg's son led to him abruptly leaving the project. (This is the same reason he dropped out of the similarly themed “Big.”) Development continued for a few years, with Nick Castle in the director's chair, before Spielberg returned. “Hook,” as the film was now entitled, ended up being Steve’s Peter Pan movie after all.  

Peter Banning is a successful corporate lawyer so devoted to his job that he frequently neglects his two children, eleven-year-old Jack and seven-year-old Maggie. The family travels to England to spend the Christmas holiday with Wendy, the woman who fostered the orphan Peter and his wife's grandmother. Granny Wendy was supposedly the inspiration for the fictional Wendy in J.M. Barrie's “Peter Pan.” While Peter, his wife, and Wendy are at a celebratory dinner, Jack and Maggie are abducted from their bedrooms. None other than Captain Hook claims responsibility. Soon, Tinkerbell appears to drag Peter – actually a middle-age Peter Pan, who forgot all his magical adventures after falling in love with Wendy's granddaughter – back to Neverland. Now, the Lost Boys have three days to get Peter back into flying, crowing, pirate-fighting shape if he hopes to rescue his children from Hook.

The narrative hook, as it were, of “Hook” is painfully ironic: What if Peter Pan, famously the boy who could never grow up... Grew up? The script takes this perhaps obvious idea to its most extreme conclusion. Peter Pan doesn't just grow up to be a normal adult. He's an aggressively boring adult. He's obsessed with his tedious job. He practices grabbing his cell phone around his co-workers like he's a western gunslinger, showing the inflated sense of importance he gives to his profession. He's a “pirate” of Wall Street, a parallel the film points out at least twice. He screams at his kids, fights with his wife, is preoccupied with appearances and rules, and drinks too much. He's even afraid of heights, to take the inversion of the Peter Pan tradition as far as it can. Asking the question of what happens when Peter Pan grows up is as valid a concept as any, I suppose. “Hook” twisting this premise into “What if Peter Pan grew up to be an asshole?” is disappointing though.

That's far from the only way “Hook's” set-up is needlessly heavy-handed. The decade of my youth was awash with mediocre family movies about workaholic dads missing out on their kids' lives. Through some wacky or magical circumstances, they come to appreciate and prioritize their off-spring again. I can only speculate why “parenthood redemption comedies” were so prevalent at the time. It probably has something to do with baby boomer writers grappling with their emotionally distant fathers and a backlash to the materialism of the eighties. Whatever the cause, “Hook” might be the prototypical parenthood redemption comedy. Peter misses his son's ballgame, the most obvious narrative cliché of an absentee dad. He sends an underling with a camcorder in his place, symbolizing how he prioritizes fancy new technology over actually being present in his boy's life. He yammers away on his cellphone, then visual shorthand for someone bringing the office home with them. Mostly, he bickers non-stop with his son, the two not seeming to like or respect each other very much. The story bends entirely around Peter Pan regaining his youthful powers and abilities in service of becoming a better father. Peter's narrative arc is not so much about defeating Captain Hook as it is about proving to his son that he's worthy to be his dad.

Of course, themes of absentee fathers and broken homes run rampant through Spielberg's entire filmography. These ideas are, in a roundabout way, even baked into the Peter Pan story. It's stage tradition that Captain Hook and Wendy's father be played by the same actor, seemingly symbolizing the fear of mature authority figures children can have. (Up to and including their own fathers, everyone's ultimate male authority figure.) Part of Captain Hook's villainous plot involves turning Peter's son against him. He does this over the course of two scenes, one in which he viciously tears down the idea that parents actually care about their children. What makes this idea appealing to lonely, hurt Jack is that it's not entirely a bad guy's lie. Being a parent is hard. Having kids does take over your life. Sacrifice and compromises are necessary. Parents do resent their kids sometimes, much the same way kids resent their parents sometimes. Ultimately, like so much media made by the boomers, “Hook” rhapsodizes in a pure, nostalgic, impossible love between parent and child. Yet the film works best when acknowledging, even if from a sideway glance, the messier realities of having a kid and being someone's child.

A big reason why the “Peter Pan” story resonates – to the point that movie studios are still obsessed with retelling it – is because it's full of deeper, melancholy symbolic touches like that. Look at Tinkerbell's unrequited love for Peter. She pines for a forever-boy who will never notice her romantically, because she's literally not the right size for him. In Barrie's own sequel, Tinkerbell dies after Peter leaves with Wendy. Because fairies only live as long as people believe in them. That's a deep, sad concept full of layers that touches on universal themes. As is the idea of a boy who never grows up, who is so full of boundless youthful energy that he can actually fly and whose days of childish fun stretch on forever. Yet he is irresistibly drawn to the open window of a beautiful girl. Peter can only fulfil the carnal, romantic desires Wendy makes him feel if he leaves Neverland behind forever, a not-too-subtle metaphor for childhood ending once puberty begins. Pixie dust, a shadow untethered from his host and acting on subconscious needs, Peter's androgynous and elfin appearance: All of these are powerful symbols resonating with the mythological, Freudian meaning that floated under the tail-end of the Victorian era. 

"Hook" never touches on many of these ideas in any meaningful way. It squeezes all the darkness and weirdness of "Peter Pan" into the Amblin blockbuster mold. Yet hints remain. Peter and Tinkerbell's unrequited relationship is a subplot that never quite pays off. However, it concludes in a beautiful moment where Tink promises Peter she'll always be waiting for him in the twilight space between wakefulness and dreams. Hook, befitting his status as title character, gets maybe the most interesting reading. Captain Hook is an old man in a world of children. He’s always outrunning a crocodile who ticks like a clock, symbolic of outrunning time ticking away until the day you die. In “Hook,” the pirate has killed the crocodile and stuffed him, seemingly escaping death. Yet he remains obsessed with the idea, smashing every clock he sees and threatening suicide at least once. In the final fight, Peter stripes away Hook’s wig, revealing him further as an old man desperate to hold onto youth. And he meets his end inside the crocodile’s jaws anyway, vanishing into thin air as the unavoidable spectre of death finally catches up with him. 

Spielberg’s film is, perhaps, at its best when embracing these melancholy ideas of youth and death. There’s a montage in the last third of “Hook” that is so good that it stands apart from the rest of the movie. Deep in the Lost Boys’ secret hideaway, Peter finally recalls his origins. He remembers being a baby, gracefully rolling away from his mother as she talks about her deeply pedestrian plans for his future. Tinkerbell carries the crying infant away from the world of responsibilities to the care-free Neverland. We see, in a series of quick cuts, Peter returning to Wendy’s window and her growing older every time. Until, finally, she’s an old woman and Peter is tempted away from Neverland by her youthful granddaughter. By the time he’s holding his own son, he’s forgotten his days in Neverland. Yet the joys of being a parent, a chance to revisit childhood, provides him with the “happy thought” he needs to fly again. This spectacular series of images is when “Hook” best balances the sentimental and sad sides of Spielberg’s style, saying so much in a short span of time. It’s a sequence full of longing, wonder, and resolution. 

Most of “Hook” is not that good. In its worst moments, the film recalls the manic excess of “1941.” For the final raid on Hook’s ship, the Lost Boys outfit themselves with home-made armor and weapons. They defeat the pirates, who have swords and flintlocks, with cannons that fire chicken eggs and marbles. The film takes a little too much cartoonish glee in these scenes of kids humiliating adults, that recall the kind of family comedies you'd think Spielberg would be above. A lot of the scenes with the Lost Boys has that same overbearing energy. One of the kids is a heavy-set young man named “Thud Butt” who curls himself up in a ball and rolls at opponents like the boulder in “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” a gag the movie likes so much it does it twice. Scenes of the boys playing basketball, skateboarding, or wind-surfing are the opposite of the timelessness of Berry's Neverland. Instead, such accessories seemed locked in 1991's idea of kid-friendly radness. Yet, as chaotic as the boys are, they are still adorable kids defined by goofy gimmicks most of the time, the film trying to have its conception of childhood both ways. Are these lawless boys out to raise Hell or adorable moppets who all miss their moms?

Criticizing “Hook” for being self-indulgent definitely seems fair. The film includes cameos from a cross-dressing Glenn Close and David Crosby, getting his balls smashed, for seemingly no reason other than it assumed Spielberg and his team. There are quasi-comedic digressions, in moments where Banning is rescued by ethereal mermaids or sniffed at by living flowers. Or a short gag devoted to baseball playing pirates. Through its various moods, the main thing holding “Hook” together is its production design, which is definitely excessive. The Lost Boys have a pool full of paint, creating a map of Neverland. Peter is flung into it from a massive slingshot. Every corner of their forest hideaway is crammed full of color and distraction, to the point where it gets eye-searing at time. Following this trend, the costumes are frequently over-the-top too. Rufio, the leader of the Lost Boys in Peter's absence, wears an outfit that seems positioned between eighties New Romantic fashion and Native American wardress. While others wear baggy pajamas or a forties street urchin get-up. 

As unrestrained as “Hook” can be at times, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't memorable. The exact same qualities that can be criticized can also be commended. The pirate's town is equally as overdone as the Lost Boys' village and it looks fucking cool. Hook's intricately decorated quarters are inside an enormous skull. The clock tower made from the crocodile's corpse is another eye-catching visual. “Hook” is packed full of touches like that. The abduction of the children are where cinematographer Dean Cundey's history in horror shows. The camera follows the claw marks up the hallway, to a window thrown open and casting purple lighting into the room. A similar effect is used when the titular hook is sharpened against a spinning stone and attached to his hand, while prismatic sparks fly. Smaller moments have been burned into my memory as well. Such as a shot from inside a megaphone of Smee speaking, his mouth in the center of the frame. Or the use of slow-motion when Peter slices a coconut, showing the swashbuckling Pan is still inside him. I guess it should be no surprise that even mid-tier Spielberg is phenomenally shot.

Robin Williams as Peter Pan, considering the unending anarchic energy the performer was capable of, seemed like ideal casting. Unfortunately, the script forces Williams to play the straight man for most of the film. The early scenes, of Peter Banning being a dick, or the moments devoted to him having heart-to-hearts with Tink or the Lost Boys do not play to Williams' strengths. It's not until a profane trade of insults with Rufio that the star starts to come to life. Even after that, “Hook” pulls Williams between the extremes of his sensibilities as an actor. At one point, he's chirping like a chicken, drooling like a pirate, or gurgling bubbles. A few minutes later he's tearfully bidding a friend good-bye. It doesn't help that the star transforming into Peter Pan again mostly happens off-screen, in-between scenes. (Or that Williams was obliviously not an action star, most of the sword fights also happening off-screen.) When tossed between sappy, manic, and stuck-up, it's amazing that Williams manages to still create a mostly compelling and likable protagonist. 

On paper, Dustin Hoffman probably seems like a weird choice to play Captain Hook. The short, soft-spoken actor isn't immediately what comes to mind when you think of a legendary pirate captain. Rumored other choices like David Bowie or Donald Sutherland probably make more sense. And yet Hoffman gives an inspired performance as Hook. Unrecognizable under heavy make-up, he vamps fantastically, clearly having the time of his life hamming it up as such a theatrical villain. Hoffman has wonderful chemistry with a joyfully silly Bob Hoskin as Smee, who nearly matches Williams in terms of wild, comedic energy. That the actors played the duo as a dysfunctional gay couple makes their interactions even funnier, vitalizing quite a few scenes in the film's middle section. 

Julia Roberts was supposedly miserable while making the movie but it's never apparent on-screen. She's far more charming as Tinkerbell than in most of her lead roles, imbuing the pixie with a charmingly spunky but still feminine vulnerability. Her romantic scenes with Williams are quiet and sweet, in a way most of the movie isn't. Maggie Smith, also under a lot of old age make-up, plays the elderly Wendy with the grace and poise we expect of the veteran performer. Dante Basco would make Rufio an icon to millennial movie nerds, somehow coming as capably tough despite his ridiculous wardrobe and having some of the script's worst dialogue. I also like Arthur Malet as Tootles, who rides just the right line between genuinely crazy and a cuter, movie version of senility. 

“Hook's” origins as a musical are still present in the final film. Several songs are present in the film. Williams simplifies some of the score's melodies for a kiddie theater song-and-dance in an early scene. The Lost Boys chant a military-like march while training Peter and Maggie singing a mournful, if hopeful, lullaby to herself in another scene. In general, Williams' score is one of his most underrated. The music, both sweeping with airy strings and deep with bold brass, bring seafaring adventure, flight, and child-like wonder to mind. Rumbling bombast perfectly suits the mayhem of the Lost Boys scenes. Hook gets a powerful theme that also implies the storming seas, with some more eccentric elements introduced later on. The only element of the score that doesn't work for me are the piano-and-bass driven theme Williams cooks up for Peter Banning's day job, which just reminds me too much of the soft jazz endemic of the early nineties. 

“Hook” was a blockbuster in 1991, grossing over three hundred million dollars at the box office. (Which could only be considered disappointing when compared to Spielberg's previous record-breakers.) There was all the expected tie-ins, like action figures, Happy Meal toys, video games, and other pop culture debris. While largely dismissed by critics at the time, the film's art direction, costumes, visual effects, make-up, and one of Williams' songs were nominated for Oscars. In time, those kids who grew up watching it would turn the movie into an unlikely cult classic. Shout “RU-FI-O” or “Bangarang!” around the right people and you'll get shouts of recognition. Spielberg himself would eventually express dismay with the film, saying he didn't have confidence in the script and tried to compensate with production values. In my eyes, “Hook's” fans and critics are both right and wrong. It's parts are greater than its whole, certain elements and scenes remaining charming even if the overall film is an undeniable mess. [Grade: B-]

Tuesday, August 9, 2022

Director Report Card: Steven Spielberg (1979)


8. 1941

Like all Film Brats, Steven Spielberg is fascinated with the golden age of Hollywood screwball comedies. Slapstick like this hasn't been in fashion since the end of fifties but that hasn't stopped Spielberg or Lucas from attempting to revive it. Like other people his age, Spielberg is also interested in World War II. He's not a military nut, so much as he's interested in the nostalgic pop culture version of that time in American history. This dual interest would combine when Spielberg was presented with a script called “The Night the Japs Attacked.” Robert Zemeckis, Bob Gale, and John Millius' script was a true-to-life adaptation of two historical events: The Japanese submarine attack on Ellwood, California and the 1942 false alarm air raid in Los Angeles. Spielberg would transform the serious screenplay into a madcap comedy. The resulting film, “1941,” remains one of the most divisive works of Spielberg's career. 

Six days after the attack on Pearl Harbor, a Japanese submarine surfaces off the coast of California. The captain plans to attack Hollywood. The local communities, on the verge of celebrating Christmas, are gripped with paranoia. A series of events play out over the course of a evening: Civilian Wally Stephens attempts to enter a dance contest, running afoul of an ill-tempered officer. The military sets up an anti-air cannon in his girlfriend's family's backyard, overlooking the ocean and a pier-side amusement park. Captain Loomis Burkhead attempts to seduce a reporter sexually aroused by airplanes. Eccentric pilot Captain Bill Kelso becomes convinced the Japanese are about to attack. All these plot threads, and more, collide as the city descends into chaos.

One of the earliest scenes in “1941” concerns Wally and his friend, Dennis, working in a dinner. They toss sausage patties on the grill, pour pancake batter around, and trip around each other. Later, they perform more pratfalls in the dining area, dripping eggs on customers and pushing a guy's face into a cake. It's a moment of frantic zaniness, the slapstick antics sucking up all the oxygen in the room in a desperate attempt to entertain. This mood continues all throughout “1941.” The film does not follow the traditional comedic structure, in the sense that it has jokes that build up towards punchlines. Instead, it hammers the audience over the head with these huge, exaggerated physical comedy gags. As the film goes on, its humor grows louder and more explosive but never actually produces laughs. 

That scene in the dinner is “1941's” establishing moment but it's not the first scene. Instead, the movie's introduction involves Spielberg recreating the beginning of “Jaws.” Instead of skinny-dipping Susan Backlinie being eaten by a shark, she's grabbed by an emerging Japanese U-Boat. It's a self-reflective joke on Spielberg's behalf, the director patting himself on the back. That self-indulgence is the other aspect that characterizes “1941.” The film ladles on more chaotic set-pieces simply because it can. A cannon rips through a house, over and over again. A tank barrels through a paint factory. A plane crashes in the La Brea Tar Pits. A seaside Ferris wheel rolls off its hinges, into the sea. “1941” constantly seeks to top itself in terms of destructive comic mayhem. Not because it's funny but out of a self-satisfied desire to always be bigger, louder, and wackier.

Spielberg presumably had a reason for reimagining World War II as farce, instead of tragedy. “1941” is not a parody of jingoism, the attitudes of war, or war-time xenophobia. In fact, the film plays some stereotypes about the Japanese uncomfortably straight. Instead, I suspect “1941” was meant to be an anti-war statement. It portrays the escalating wartime tension as one big misunderstanding. Everyone is so terrified of the Japanese attack, that they act foolishly.  They wreak chaos on each other because they're hopelessly afraid. Meanwhile, an overly macho desire to act heroic or get laid similarly causes men to act like fools. If any coherent message emerges from “1941's” nonstop mayhem, it's that the act of war is directed by irrational impulses.

Yet attempting to find a deeper theme in “1941” feels like a fool's errand. The movie's only real objective, as far as I can tell, is to be the biggest, most excessive slapstick experience it can be. In order to facilitate this, the biggest comedy stars of the day were drafted. Each performer plays totally to type. John Belushi, as “Wild” Bill Kelso, is an overconfident lunatic who brings gleeful mayhem with him everywhere he goes. Dan Aykroyd shows up as Sergeant Tree, a straight-faced lecturer prone to long-winded digressions about various topics. Later, Aykroyd descends into utterly manic mugging. John Candy appears as a panicking man-child of a private. Even Joe Flaherty, in a small role as a hammy dance hall M.C., and Eddie Deezan, as a weirdo with a ventriloquist dummy, do exactly what you'd expect. 

Since “1941's” material is so directionless, its cast of renown comedy stars mostly feel like they are desperately trying to wring laughs out of lifeless material. Instead, it's the murderer's row of beloved character actors in the supporting roles that get most of the actual chuckles. Warren Oates' natural strength for unhinged characters is well utilized in the role of a trigger-happy Colonel. Robert Stack does a fabulous straight-man bit as a version of Major Joseph Sitwell who just wants to enjoy “Dumbo.” Slim Pickins is genuinely funny as a hayseed picked-up by the Japanese, who finds his own way to foil the invasion. Toshiro Mifune and Christopher Lee ignore any comedic instincts as the antagonists. Having a cast of well-known character actors play it straight, in view of the non-stop wackiness, proves to be the one smart decision “1941” makes. Only Ned Beatty seems miscast, due to the film punishing him with its most misguided slapstick.  

Yet such a sprawling cast is an issue of its own. “1941's” plot is such a mess of intertwining subplots that I'm not sure you can say it even has a main character. The posters and DVD covers center Belushi as the protagonist but he weaves in and out of the story. It certainly looks like Tim Matheson's Loomis is going to be the hero. Yet he's absent for long stretches and totally disappears before the end. I suppose Bobby Di Cicco's Wally, and his on-going feud with Treat Williams' prickish corporal, is the closest thing the movie has to a lead. Yet even he ends up having surprisingly little effect on the overall plot. A comedy this chaotic needs a primary figure to center the audience. “1941” stubbornly refuses to provide this.

“1941” is also disconcertingly horny. Steven Spielberg is probably the last director you'd ever expect to make a sex comedy. And yet, here we are. Matheson's subplot about seducing aero-erotic reporter, played by a game Nancy Allen, involves quite a lot of groping about in cockpits. There's plenty of crude word-play and more heavy petting then you'd expect. It is, simply put, uncomfortable to watch. Spielberg has no aptitude for eroticism, the results coming off as more hopelessly awkward than sexy or funny. Yet that doesn't stop the pursuit of sexual satisfaction from cropping up throughout the film. There's a naked lady in the first scene, after all. Williams' subplot involves far too many rape-y vibes and the unfortunate cliché of an overeager plus-sized female. 

Clearly, “1941” didn't work for me at all. Is there anything I liked about this motion picture? One or two things. The stand-out moment of the film has little to do with its all-out assault on the senses, in service of humor. Instead, it occurs when Di Cicco and Williams get into a fist-fight in a dance hall. What results is a swinging ballet through an elaborate set, the performers tumbling and leaping around one another. They roll over tables and run up walls. It's equal parts dance number and is it fisticuffs. You can tell Spielberg delighted in directing this moment as well, as the camera gleefully swoops in and out of the crowds during these moments. Supposedly, the director contemplated turning “1941” into a full-blown musical. As if the film could've gotten any more excessive! But this scene suggests, perhaps, that's what the film should've been all along.

Something else I admire about “1941” is its special effects and production design. Spielberg supposedly wanted to shoot all of “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” on sound stages, after his negative experience with location shooting on “Jaws.” He didn't do that but, from the looks of it, “1941” is mostly shot on elaborate sound stage. This creates an intentionally artificial atmosphere, that suits the movie's tone of exaggerated mayhem. William A. Fraker's stylized cinematography makes sure the nighttime scenes look as interesting as possible. This old-school display of Hollywood wizardry is also noticeable in the movie's extensive use of miniature effects. The airplanes, buildings, giant Santa Claus statues, Ferris wheel, submarine, and dinosaurs – yes, there's a dinosaur – all look pretty neat.

Ultimately, all the production values in the world can't save a comedy that simply isn't funny. The handful of laughs in “1941” comes from simply letting its cast do their thing. John Belushi awkwardly leaping out of an airplane and deploying a parachute at ground level gets a bigger laugh than all the pyrotechnics piled on in the last act. Since “1941” is pitched at the level of full-bore hysterics from the very beginning, the audience is exhausted by its mayhem immediately. By the time its nearly two-hour long runtime is up, I was left totally numb from the non-stop chaos. (And Spielberg's director's cut, assembled for television, is even fucking longer.) This continues even into the credits, where each actor is introduced by them yelling and John Williams' score is paired with random explosions. 

Spielberg rightfully broke records and earned praise with “Jaws” and “Close Encounters.” Not a single soul was willing to say “no” to him after those hits. This lead to “1941” being a film of staggering excess. The result was poorly received by critics. (Though it still earned three Academy Award nominations, for Fraker's cinematography, Visual Effects, and Sound.) The film was remembered as a flop but actually managed to turn a small profit. Despite that, the perceived underperformance of the film was humbling for Spielberg. The man himself has admitted that he was “arrogant” while making the movie and that it simply “wasn't funny enough.” Its reputation as Spielberg's worst film has, of course, earned “1941” a cult following of defenders. I can sort of see where they're coming from. Something this unhinged and meticulously crafted usually would appeal to me. Yet “1941's” deafening attempts at physical humor, total lack of pacing, and undisciplined script prevents me from deriving much joy from it. [Grade: C-]

Friday, March 4, 2022

OSCARS 2022: Spencer (2021)


If you don’t remember the nineties, you might not know what a big deal Princess Diana of Wales was. For a time, she was genuinely one of the most famous people in the world. She was such a philanthropist, that the media dubbed her “The People’s Princess.” Of course, that kind of fame brought with it a crushing amount of scrutiny. The tabloid press’ obsession with every single thing she did was unending and would play a role in her death. As an American, I never quite understood the hype around Diana or any of the British royals. I guess the English-speaking world just couldn’t resist the allure of a princess who was also young and conventionally attractive. Nevertheless, Princess Diana’s short, glamorous, sad life has an unavoidably tragic appeal to it. I’m not surprised filmmakers would be drawn to it. Director Pablo Larrain, having previously put an art house spin on the life of Jacqueline Kennedy, gives a similar treatment to Princess Di in “Spencer.” The film has been critically acclaimed, if somewhat controversial, and has now earned “Twilight” star turned indie darling Kristen Stewart her first Oscar nomination. 

“Spencer” mixes together fact, fiction, and speculation. Set around Christmas Day of 1991, it has Princess Diana arriving at the Sandringham estate for Royal Family holiday dinner. Her marriage to Prince Charles is crumbling, following his highly publicized affair. Diana increasingly feels the pressure of being both part of the royal family and constantly in the public spotlight. She feels increasingly drawn to the abandoned mansion next door, her childhood home. She’s having hallucinations of Anne Boleyn. As her mental health crisis grows graver, she ponders on whether she can bring herself to walk away from being a literal princess. 

Considering Larrain turned a biopic about Jackie O. into a bracing examination of PTSD, it should come as no surprise that his take on the life of Princess Diana is equally unconventional. “Spencer,” in many ways, resembles a psychological horror movie. The film is determined to take us inside Diana’s anxious mindset. Johnny Greenwood’s discordant jazz score gives the entire film with an uneasy, nervous feeling. The foggy English countryside provides a certain gloomy ambiance. When the film includes cameos from the appearances of Anne Boleyn and a climatic visit to a crumbling, shadowy old mansion, it seems to have embraced its status as a story of unsettled minds and places. There’s even occasional indulgences of body horror. Such as during a vivid hallucination when Diana’s pearl necklace comes apart in her sickeningly green pea soup and she’s forced to swallow. Or when she cuts herself with a pair of wire clippers. 

“Spencer” utilizes some extraordinary filmmaking in pursuit of this goal. Larrain’s camera roams through the endless halls of Sandringham palace, the frequent movement similarly transporting us into Diana’s nervous head space. A brilliantly shot scene frames Diana and Charles at opposite ends of a pool table. The camera draws closer with each shot of them, visually setting them up not as equal partners in a marriage but as adversaries. The film is loaded with perhaps heavy handed visual symbolism. Diana repeatedly revisits a scarecrow by her first home, a figure from her childhood that looms over her still. That pearl necklace, a gift from the queen, regularly reminds us of a prisoner’s chain. There’s a swirling descent into her youthful memories at one point. Diana repeatedly draws parallels between herself and the pheasants hunted on the estate grounds, as a pretty living thing that is publicly sacrificed. Yet this is the heightened world “Spencer” takes place in — it’s not like the life of royalty has much realism to it anyway — and these touches only make the movie more compelling.

Even though they say that every little girl dreams of being a princess, “Spencer” convincingly makes the case that being royalty really sucks. Constantly being in the public eye has given Diana an eating disorder, as she vacillates between bingeing and purging. The royal family, including her own husband, greet her only with judgmental mental glares. She has no privacy on the estate grounds, rumors of her behavior circulating among the staff. She can’t control what she wears or even what she does in her bedroom. Police officers or a pompous royal butler, played by a suitably rat-like Timothy Spall, pry into every moment of escape she has. The curtains are eventually sewn shut, boxing her in even more. Her only friend, played by the ever graceful Sally Hawkins, is shipped away at one point. “Spencer” depicts Diana as completely trapped in a life she didn’t choose for herself. 

All throughout the film, Diana is constantly told to be more diligent in separating her public and private life. “Spencer” takes place long before Diana’s death but the frequent references to tabloid photographers, or a scene where she steps out of a church to be greeted by a wall of paparazzi flashbulbs, can’t help but remind you of it. It’s not that Diana needs to compartmentalize her personal and public feelings. It’s that her private world is being totally nullified by the pressures around her. The only time she seems free is when she’s with her sons. A quiet moment where they ask why their Christmases are so different from normal people’s Christmases speaks towards Diana’s own dissatisfaction with her life. As does a brilliant nighttime sequence where she plays a game with the boys, lit by candlelight with the actors improvising their genuinely off-the-cuff seeming dialogue. Eventually, “Spencer” does lean towards images of escape and freedom. Yet, like in any horror movie with an “Or Is It?” ending, the knowledge of Diana’s inevitable fate gives its ending an eerie feeling. 

At the center of the film's uneasy emotions is Kristen Stewart's performance. The very American Stewart might seem like odd casting for such a quintessentially British figure but she excels in parts of isolated, alienated women. Stewart’s skill for playing characters who are barely holding it together, despite their icy outer appearance, is put to good use here. It makes the rare moments of relief or escape all the more meaningful, when Stewart does such a good job of projecting the innate discomfort Diana feels in this story. For whatever it’s worth, the make-up team makes her a convincing facsimile of the famous woman. And she nails the accent too. 

Ultimately, I’m kind of surprised that “Spencer” managed to earn any Oscar nominations at all. Not because the movie isn’t excellent – it is – but because movies like this are beloved more by Letterboxd users than Academy voters. I figured something like this would prove too artsy or chilly for people used to more traditional biopics. I guess the narrative of Stewart earning critical praise after years as a punchline was too much to resist. Whether or not “Spencer” wins in the sole category it’s nominated in is besides the point. It’s a beautifully constructed and deeply felt motion picture. [9/10]

Sunday, February 27, 2022

OSCARS 2022: The 2022 Oscar Nominated Animated Short Films




“Affairs of the Art” is narrated by a boisterous middle-age woman named Beryl and purports to be about her budding artistic endeavors. Instead, she frequently digresses about the various obsessions of people in her family. Such as her sister Beverly who, as a child, had a number of disturbing fixations. Such as insects, dead animals, decay, pickling, mummification, Vladimir Lenin, taxidermy, and Trigger the horse. She also talks about her teenage son who, as a boy, dotted on an injured pigeon he rescued. After the bird was killed by a neighbor's cat, he concocted an elaborate revenge which began a lifelong obsession with complex machinery. Beryl attempts to talk about her art career but often gets distracted by the topic of her sex life. Finally, some advice from her successful sister convinces her to pursue her hobby full-time.

“Affairs of the Art” comes to us from director animator Joanna Quinn and is something of a sequel to her 1987 short, “Girls Night Out.” Quinn seems to delight in contrasting her cutesy character designs – chubby old women and wide-eyed moppets – with as many grotesque images as possible. A dead mouse and a quickly rotting human corpse are depicted in loving close-ups. At one point, the decapitated head of a pigeon is thrust right towards the audience. Nudity, especially of older and overweight bodies, is also a reoccurring motif. Beryl and her husband often get nude, stretching their flabby bodies in all sorts of ways. This fascination with exaggerated decay, of the living and the dead, extends to a story which strays on many surreal asides. My favorite is young Beverly's fantasy of meeting the mummified Lenin and soaring over Moscow with him. 

It's a very odd little film. As is usually the case with the weird shit that gets nominated in this category, I'm assuming the animation is what caught the Academy's attention. And there's no doubt that “Affairs of the Art” looks incredible. There's a sketchy, painterly quality to the artwork. The characters move in fluid fashion and everything is extra detailed. While the subjects here are the kind of things you probably don't want to look at it, they are lovingly rendered. Perhaps beautifully drawing ugly shit and bringing it to life is Quinn's obsession. Menna Trussler's manic voice work as Beryl is also interesting, even if it threatens to become annoying as the short meanders on its way to the point. [6/10]



This Chilean short follows an unassuming looking middle-age woman through a typical week in her life. She bakes, has vivid nightmares/hallucinations, and displays a disturbing relationship with her dog. Once a week, she goes to an isolated building, creeps down to the basement, and tortures and murders the women kept there. Eventually, it seems her paranoia and fantasies catch up with her. If you're wondering why this short is so unnervingly vivid, that's because it's based on a true story: Ingrid Olderock was a professional torturer for Augusto Pinochet – the dictator who ruled over Chile from 1973 to 1990 – who specialized in tormenting other women.

“Beast” obviously deals with disturbing subject matter. The short actually shows a considerable amount of restraint in depicting the horrors Oderock carried out. (I'd recommended reading about the atrocities of Pinochet's reign if you ever want to loose some more faith in humanity.) Fittingly, “Beast” creates quite an unsettling mood. Its sound design and music are excellent, getting under your skin. It takes the viewer inside Ingrid Olderock's mind, showing a series of creepy nightmares and daydreams she has. The film never quite humanizes this terrible person – she remains stoic and unfeeling throughout – but does suggest that the cavalcade of terrors she wrought weighed on her to some degree. 

Adding to this disquieting mood is the presentation. “Beast's” character designs look like creepy porcelain dolls, with unmoving faces. When brought to life with jerky stop-motion animation, the results is quite spooky. The short implies utilizes surreal sights – like an enormous bullet slowly moving through a house or faceless figures – and lots of judicial edits to imply the greater horrors it's about. It's an effectively disturbing film, designed to bring attention to these criminal acts. Considering there's almost no information about Olderock on the English language web – most of the articles about her relate to this film – I'd say that goal has been achieved. [7/10]



“BoxBallet” concerns two very different figures crossing paths. A brutish boxer and a graceful ballet dancer live in the same apartment building, initially unaware of each other. That changes after he retrieves her cat from a tree. The two begin an odd friendship and a budding romance, as she tries to introduce him to the joys of the more peaceful things in life and he charms her with gifts like a giant bag of sugar. The two begin to rub off on each other, allowing them to stand-up to the bullies in their lives: A handsy instructor at the ballet academy and a rival boxer with a more powerful punch.

The first thing you notice about “BoxBallet” are its likably exaggerated character designs. The ballet dancer is rail thin, her design not being much more than a series of straight-lines. The boxer is utterly grotesque, made totally of swollen lumps and sagging sinew with a noticeably crooked nose. All the character designs have that amusingly ugly angle to them. The second thing you notice about “BoxBallet” is how fluid much of the movement is here. The opening scene of the dancer racing from the theater to the subway train, a moment where a referee is sent spinning around the boxing ring by a stray punch, or the dancer's attempts to teach her new friend roller-skating all have an amazing sense of detailed movement to them. This pairs well with a soundtrack that blends classical music, ambient noise, and New Wave pop. 

It looks good and it's an amusing watch too. The oddball sense of humor here really appeals to me, as this hideous boxer has a soft side which manifests itself in sweetly awkward ways. While it's easy enough to predict where it's going, this one balances its quirky humor and sentimental heart with some nicely demented animation. [7/10]



While the rest of the nominated films in this category were clearly meant to stand-alone as short films, “Robin Robin” was obviously designed to be a television Christmas special. The titular character is a young robin that has been adopted by a group of mice. She's been raised as a mouse and, until very recently, believed herself to be one. After her family has an unsuccessful attempt to steal some food from a human house, she sets out on her own to enter the home. Along the way, she meets a magpie who tells her of the “wishing star” atop the human's Christmas tree. He claims that, if one grabs that star, they'll have their heart's greatest desire. Robin decides to steal the star so she can wish to become a real mouse.

“Robin Robin” is a co-production between Netflix and Aardman, that beloved purveyor of British stop-motion whimsy. Like Aardman's best films, there's a wonderful tactile aspect to the animation here. The adorable characters are wonderfully fuzzy, like old vinyl dolls. The environments are beautifully detailed, looking like fantastically realized deserts. (This is especially apparent in the Christmas feast glimpsed in the final scene.) Everyone moves fantastically and smoothly. 

As you'd expect from Aardman, it's an extremely cute production with just enough oddball humor to give it some grit. There are several musical numbers, none of which are that memorable. However, the voice cast – which includes Richard E. Grant as the magpie and Gillian Anderson as the house cat antagonist – are naturally hugely entertaining. There's some blink-and-miss-it gags here that made me chuckle, like the magpie munching on the bugs that assist him during his song. Or the one little mouse pooing a little after being frightened. It has a sweet moral about how family is something you find, not something you're born into. While not really about Christmas, the holiday trappings add some nice seasoning. Overall, “Robin Robin” is delightful. [7/10]



The last of this year's crop of animated shorts, “The Windshield Wiper,” asks the same question that Haddaway asked all those years ago: What is love? This theme is explored over a series of scenarios. A man sits in a bar, smokes a cigarette, and listen to men and women complain about their dating lives. A man and a naked woman sit on a beach, smoking and not talking. A pair of tattooed hipsters shop for milk in a grocery store, right next to each other, ignoring one another and scrolling a dating app. A Japanese girl stands on the corner of a tall building and considers throwing herself off. A man stands in the rain, holding a ragged bouquet of roses, and ringing a doorbell. And so on. 

“The Windshield Wiper” ranks among this year's most pretentious Oscar nominees. Some of its images are laughably conceited. Such as the aforementioned tattooed hipsters, seemingly perfect for one another, who don't even notice they're standing next to each other because they are so absorbed in their cellphones. Or another moment, where a text conversation between two people – one clearly more invested in this relationship than the other – is displayed over an image of a satellite. Ya know, there's almost something profound there, how relationships are formed and people are connected across these invisible webs of data. Yet it just comes off as “phone bad” in the hands of a film as chronically high on its own farts as this one.

That smug attitude becomes increasingly obvious as this fifteen minute short winds down, with a montage of people loving and being together over a song that bluntly sums up the theme before concluding with a pithy – and meaningless – answer to the initial question. I can only hope that “The Windshield Wiper” got nominated because it's animation is interesting and not because of its faux-profundity. The CGI images are highly stylized, the color palette washed-out, and the cartoony but recognizably human figures often depicted from unexpected angles. It looks cool but is a puffed-up bit of nothingness otherwise. [5/10]