I don't know why the "Final Destination" movies took a fourteen year long break. As far as slasher flicks go, these are on the pricier side. The last two both had 40 million dollar price tags but still easily turned healthy profits. Maybe New Line Cinema was too busy prioritizing "The Conjuring" and "IT" series. The ghost movies and Stephen King adaptations are probably classier examples of churned-out horror I.P. product than the gore-fests... But I know which type I prefer. Shortly announced after "Final Destination 5" did well, the sequel would finally emerge from development hell in 2022. That's when Zach Lipovsky and Adam Stein won producers over with a pitch reel that ended with them "dying" in a freak accident, an extremely clever move. The duo had previously directed 2018's "Freaks," but I had only seen Lipovsky's solo attempt to reboot "Leprechaun." That sucked so I kept my expectations humble for the generically subtitled "Final Destination: Bloodlines." However, it turns out these two knew what they were doing. The latest taste of Death's design was a hit with fans and audiences this past summer.
Every night, Stefani Reyes dreams about a blonde woman, visiting a fancy restaurant within a Space Needle-like observation deck with her boyfriend. The tower collapses and everyone dies a horrible death, the dreams traumatizing Stefani to the point that she's crashing out at college. The woman in her dreams is her grandmother Iris, which her absentee mother and friendly uncle are estranged from. Stef hunts down Grandma Iris at the fortified compound she lives in. Upon hearing about her dream, the old woman informs her granddaughter that it's a premonition she had in 1963. She saved hundreds of lives that night... But that wasn't Death's design. Over the years, everyone who was supposed to die in that building and all their offspring have perished in bizarre accidents, in the order they were originally meant to go. It's taken the Reaper sixty years to work his way down to Iris, who has learned to spot the signs that predict when Death will strike. She compiled a book of all her information and gives it to Stefani... Before being impaled by a falling weather vane. Stefani is soon convinced that Death is coming for her family, learning to see the omens that foretell each "accident." She embarks on a quest with her mom and cousins to find some way out of the fate's web before it strikes with especially vicious gusto.
In the lead-up to "Bloodlines'" release, it was said that the new film would not follow the formula of the previous five entries. This is somewhat true. By having the plot-instigating disaster occur decades ago, with the proper protagonist experiencing the vision as a dream, it does change the general structure while still following the same old set-up we've seen before. The sequel notably does not explore any of the questions I've had about the premise, such as where the psychic visions come from. Nor does it address the various spiritual or philosophical implications of the abstract concept of Death itself operating like a lunatic serial killer. Nevertheless, "Bloodlines" does earn a lot of points for getting creative with the set-up. The implications of the idea that Death must obsessively, compulsively murder people in the order they were meant to die are explored, alongside the various ways to escape – or at least hold off – the inevitable. Some extra thought was definitely put into the rules these movies have always operated on.
I pointed out before that trying to defeat “Death's design” in the previous “Final Destination” movies renders a person a gibbering lunatic, looking for signs and symbols in every single thing that happens around them and paranoid at every point. “Bloodlines” comes to the same conclusion. Grandma Iris was so terrified that Death would come for her kids at any minute, that she left them thoroughly traumatized and resentful. Steffi's mother eventually realize that her own childhood left her incapable of being a decent mom to her kids. Now, carrying around a whole book full of crazy and sticking elaborate pin boards to the wall, Steff quickly becomes the spitting image of madness herself. Of course, in these movies, the “crazy” person is actually correct. Something is out to get them and the signs to avoid it are all over. It takes a bit of time but a surprising amount of “Bloodlines” revolves around the entire family coming together, believing these statements that sound crazy for the benefit of someone they care about.
Is this some sort of metaphor for loving and supporting somebody through a mental illness, even if you don't entirely understand what they're going through? Possibly but, nevertheless, “Final Destination: Bloodlines” remains a surprisingly poignant reflection on the power of familial love throughout. Early on, Uncle Howard assures his kids and relatives that family is the most important thing in the world to him. The way his kids, nephews and nieces watch out for each other as death closes in on them proves that they believe this too. That “Bloodlines” juggles this commitment with the sometimes messy realities of being part of a family – present in Stefani's mother admitting her children are better off without her – proves that the screenwriters took this idea seriously too. That's not the only territory the movie is unusually sincere about. Tony Todd's small role was obviously recorded when the great genre icon was deep in treatment. Having someone so clearly near the end of their life look right into the camera and tell us to appreciate the time we have left makes the dialogue a lot more meaningful.
I didn't expect the sixth entry in what is essentially a slasher franchise to make me a little misty-eyed. This is not to say that “Final Destination: Bloodlines” is an attempt to make the series all elevated. (Aside from the geographical position of the opening disaster.) “Bloodlines” might be the entry in the series most willing to walk the line between comedy and grisly mayhem. The gore is gnarlier than ever. A crushing in a trash compactor splits a head along an especially brutal line. A sequence involving an MRI machine surely ranks among the franchise's most painfully executed deaths. At the same time, these moments of sickening gore occur right alongside blatantly comedic beats. The driver of that trash truck is listening to an especially ironic musical choice. The execution immediately following that brutal magnetic scene plays exactly like the punchline to a cartoonish bit of physical comedy. It's honestly refreshing to see the filmmakers behind “Final Destination” admit that these are basically splat-stick movies at this point, even if it borders feeling a little too mean-spirited at times.
Zach Lipovsky and Adam Stein's directorial approach is clearly on the more devious side. They employ Dutch angles a few times, often ironic soundtrack choices, and frenetic editing. Among the collection of gnarly stunts – including the record holder for oldest person set on-fire on film, it seems – is also a little too much CGI. Despite some minor reservations, “Bloodlines” is a good, gory time at the movies. The backyard-barbecue-gong-wrong set piece prepares every element of its fabulously bloody show like a neatly assembled domino game. Watching the pieces fall into place has never been more satisfying. A colorful and kind-hearted cast and a slightly more thoughtful script brings a little more emotional resonance to the material than was needed but was certainly appreciated. And God bless Tony Todd, an consummate professional right up tot he end. I fully expect this series to continue and for Death to stalk theater rows once more soon enough. It'll certainly be lacking something without that familiar voice delivering those ominous warnings though... [7/10]
Every night, Stefani Reyes dreams about a blonde woman, visiting a fancy restaurant within a Space Needle-like observation deck with her boyfriend. The tower collapses and everyone dies a horrible death, the dreams traumatizing Stefani to the point that she's crashing out at college. The woman in her dreams is her grandmother Iris, which her absentee mother and friendly uncle are estranged from. Stef hunts down Grandma Iris at the fortified compound she lives in. Upon hearing about her dream, the old woman informs her granddaughter that it's a premonition she had in 1963. She saved hundreds of lives that night... But that wasn't Death's design. Over the years, everyone who was supposed to die in that building and all their offspring have perished in bizarre accidents, in the order they were originally meant to go. It's taken the Reaper sixty years to work his way down to Iris, who has learned to spot the signs that predict when Death will strike. She compiled a book of all her information and gives it to Stefani... Before being impaled by a falling weather vane. Stefani is soon convinced that Death is coming for her family, learning to see the omens that foretell each "accident." She embarks on a quest with her mom and cousins to find some way out of the fate's web before it strikes with especially vicious gusto.
In the lead-up to "Bloodlines'" release, it was said that the new film would not follow the formula of the previous five entries. This is somewhat true. By having the plot-instigating disaster occur decades ago, with the proper protagonist experiencing the vision as a dream, it does change the general structure while still following the same old set-up we've seen before. The sequel notably does not explore any of the questions I've had about the premise, such as where the psychic visions come from. Nor does it address the various spiritual or philosophical implications of the abstract concept of Death itself operating like a lunatic serial killer. Nevertheless, "Bloodlines" does earn a lot of points for getting creative with the set-up. The implications of the idea that Death must obsessively, compulsively murder people in the order they were meant to die are explored, alongside the various ways to escape – or at least hold off – the inevitable. Some extra thought was definitely put into the rules these movies have always operated on.
I pointed out before that trying to defeat “Death's design” in the previous “Final Destination” movies renders a person a gibbering lunatic, looking for signs and symbols in every single thing that happens around them and paranoid at every point. “Bloodlines” comes to the same conclusion. Grandma Iris was so terrified that Death would come for her kids at any minute, that she left them thoroughly traumatized and resentful. Steffi's mother eventually realize that her own childhood left her incapable of being a decent mom to her kids. Now, carrying around a whole book full of crazy and sticking elaborate pin boards to the wall, Steff quickly becomes the spitting image of madness herself. Of course, in these movies, the “crazy” person is actually correct. Something is out to get them and the signs to avoid it are all over. It takes a bit of time but a surprising amount of “Bloodlines” revolves around the entire family coming together, believing these statements that sound crazy for the benefit of someone they care about.
Is this some sort of metaphor for loving and supporting somebody through a mental illness, even if you don't entirely understand what they're going through? Possibly but, nevertheless, “Final Destination: Bloodlines” remains a surprisingly poignant reflection on the power of familial love throughout. Early on, Uncle Howard assures his kids and relatives that family is the most important thing in the world to him. The way his kids, nephews and nieces watch out for each other as death closes in on them proves that they believe this too. That “Bloodlines” juggles this commitment with the sometimes messy realities of being part of a family – present in Stefani's mother admitting her children are better off without her – proves that the screenwriters took this idea seriously too. That's not the only territory the movie is unusually sincere about. Tony Todd's small role was obviously recorded when the great genre icon was deep in treatment. Having someone so clearly near the end of their life look right into the camera and tell us to appreciate the time we have left makes the dialogue a lot more meaningful.
I didn't expect the sixth entry in what is essentially a slasher franchise to make me a little misty-eyed. This is not to say that “Final Destination: Bloodlines” is an attempt to make the series all elevated. (Aside from the geographical position of the opening disaster.) “Bloodlines” might be the entry in the series most willing to walk the line between comedy and grisly mayhem. The gore is gnarlier than ever. A crushing in a trash compactor splits a head along an especially brutal line. A sequence involving an MRI machine surely ranks among the franchise's most painfully executed deaths. At the same time, these moments of sickening gore occur right alongside blatantly comedic beats. The driver of that trash truck is listening to an especially ironic musical choice. The execution immediately following that brutal magnetic scene plays exactly like the punchline to a cartoonish bit of physical comedy. It's honestly refreshing to see the filmmakers behind “Final Destination” admit that these are basically splat-stick movies at this point, even if it borders feeling a little too mean-spirited at times.
Zach Lipovsky and Adam Stein's directorial approach is clearly on the more devious side. They employ Dutch angles a few times, often ironic soundtrack choices, and frenetic editing. Among the collection of gnarly stunts – including the record holder for oldest person set on-fire on film, it seems – is also a little too much CGI. Despite some minor reservations, “Bloodlines” is a good, gory time at the movies. The backyard-barbecue-gong-wrong set piece prepares every element of its fabulously bloody show like a neatly assembled domino game. Watching the pieces fall into place has never been more satisfying. A colorful and kind-hearted cast and a slightly more thoughtful script brings a little more emotional resonance to the material than was needed but was certainly appreciated. And God bless Tony Todd, an consummate professional right up tot he end. I fully expect this series to continue and for Death to stalk theater rows once more soon enough. It'll certainly be lacking something without that familiar voice delivering those ominous warnings though... [7/10]
One cannot overstate the effect “Psycho” had on macabre cinema. Laying the foundation for what would become the slasher movie, making the insane killer with a disturbed mind a regular part of the monster pantheon, essentially kicking off the modern age of the genre: Hitchcock's masterpiece can be said to have provided all of this. In the more immediate sense, the film spawned a slew of imitators. Hammer Studios made several moody, black-and-white thrillers with one-word names like “Paranoic,” “Nightmare,” “Maniac,” “Hysteria.” Suspiciously similar titles like “Dementia 13” or “Psyche '59” would come along shortly afterwards. Films exploring abnormal psychology like “Mirage,” “Repulsion,” “Aroused” probably owe Hitch more than a little credit too. None of these would-be “Psychos” were as blatant as “Homicidal.” William Castle – kind of the crass American Hitchcock, in his own way or at least in his own mind – and Columbia rushed the movie into theaters a year after Norman Bates' debut in hopes that the public's appetite for such grisly shenanigans were only beginning.
A strange blonde woman calling herself Miriam Webster checks into a hotel in Ventura, California. She immediately starts flirting with the bell boy and, after flashing two thousand dollars in cash at him, convinces the guy to marry her. That very night, the two head to the justice of the peace's house, paying extra to get married right away... At which point “Miriam” stabs the justice to death. Turns out her true identity is Emily. She is the live-in nurse of a disabled woman named Helga. She is the girlfriend of Warren, Helga's step-son who recently buried his misogynistic, abusive father. The real Miriam is Warren's sister. Miriam – befriending a local pharmacist and detective – soon learns that Emily is wanted in connection with a homicide. Emily's increasingly unstable behavior suggest she's capable of the killing too. More dark family secrets will be revealed as Miriam attempts to uncover Emily's secrets and protect her brother before it's too late.
William Castle's movies will always be remembered for their outrageous gimmicks. “Homicidal” has one of his silliest ones: The Fright Break, an on-screen countdown to the film's supposedly scariest moment that would allow anyone too timid to continue a way out. At the same time, Castle's films were often better than these advertising stunts let on. “Homicidal” has some striking black-and-white cinematography from Burnett Guffrey. This is especially evident in the point-of-view shots during and directly following the Fright Break, leading up to a stylish unveiling of a grisly surprise. That's another thing “Homicidal” has going for it: It's gorier than “Psycho.” The stabbing of the justice of the peace is surprisingly drawn out and bloody. The discovery of the climatic murder, meanwhile, has the same level of campy glee to it that often characterized Castle's movies. It's a shocking, horrific surprise for the characters but more like a funny prank for the audience, not unlike a Tingler in the theater seats or an Emergo swinging out of the screen.
These moments stand-out in the film probably because the rest of it is not all that memorable. “Homicidal” is fairly bare bones on a plotting level. The audience knows something is up with Emily from the first scene. Watching the characters come to that same conclusion is neither that suspenseful nor that compelling. Patricia Breslin is capable enough as Miriam but the rest of the film's heroic cast members – a series of bland white guys, one after the other – could not be more forgettable. The backstory of Warren and his sister are revealed entirely through dialogue, long conversations that are never as compelling as they need to be. All the talks of mysterious trips to Denmark or who will inherit Daddy's millions strictly cause the eyes to glaze over.
“Homicidal,” from the title on-down, is blatantly imitative of Hitchcock's film. Both start with a blonde woman arriving at a hotel with an awful lot of money. Both feature an immobile old woman in a chair – so there's some “Baby Jane” in here too – and set a key scene around a staircase. Most obviously, “Homicidal” features a gender-bending twist ending. Spoiler alert for a sixty-two year old movie: Warren and Emily are the same person. Warren and Miriam's dad was such a he-man woman hater that he couldn't stand the thought of having two daughters. Thus, the biological sex of his second child was withheld from him and the infant lived their life as a man. The doctor that explains all this doesn't take as long as Simon Oakland did in “Psycho,” nor is there as much focus on the psychology that led to this transition. While a fairly lazy reversal of “Psycho's” twist, there is an interesting layer here. That Warren was beaten and ostracized by a sexist father and made to walk a traditionally masculine path, before striking out in a feminine guise that rejects the role forced upon him. From a sideways view, it almost seems like the film is arguing against the role of gender at all. Not intentionally, as the film is still as cis-het centered as can be, but there is, perhaps, a subtext of queer vengeance on the repressive, straight society they are forced to live in.
Not that the twist would be surprising to anyone paying attention. The much referenced but never fully explained trip to Denmark is clearly meant to imply some sex change shenanigans. Most obviously, Warren looks awfully feminine from the moment he walks on-screen. It's hard to miss that both Warren and Emily have Jean Arless' distinctive facial features, that a deeper masculine voice has clearly been dubbed in every time he moves his lips. “Homicidal” is definitely a movie where the parts do not add up to an especially strong whole. A head rolling down the stairs, a brutal stabbing, and the unintended LGBT+ rustlings are all much more interesting than the movie around them. Unsurprisingly, “homicidal” has largely been overshadowed by its own gimmick. The shame-inducing techniques Castle added to the Fright Break – highlighting the cowardice of anyone who ducked out or simply asked for a refund – are more amusing than anything in the film. Yellow foot steps in the theater, clucking chicken noises in the lobby, being forced to sign an official statement declaring yourself a scaredy-cat: All simply hilarious. Truly, when they say “You couldn't make that movie today,” they are talking about a film that publicly humiliated anyone who dared to walk out on it. [6/10]
Dead of Night: A Woman Sobbing
Last September, I watched the first episode of "Dead of Night," a ghost story anthology that aired on BBC2 for a single, six episode season in 1972. It remains one of the most eerie hours of television I've yet seen. "A Woman Sobbing" would be the last installment of the program to air and is now one of three episodes still known to survive. It concerns Jane, wife to Frank and mother to two sons. The family has recently moved to a house in the countryside. Every night, before bed, Jane hears a woman sobbing from the attic. The husband doesn't hear anything and is concerned his wife is having a mental breakdown. Jane investigates all possibilities. There is no gas leak, no sign that her husband is manipulating her. Taking medication, seeing a psychiatrist, and consulting a priest do not cause the strange noises to cease. Frank hires a live-in nanny, an attractive Dutch girl in her twenties, for fear that motherhood is exhausting Jane. This only exposes the sexual frustration between the couple. And still the spectral cries of an unseen woman continue, soon joined by the attic window opening on its own and vision of someone falling to their death. The wife soon takes matters into her own hands.
Clearly, something in the British condition caused their TV writers to excel at stark, ambiguous, and unsettling ghost stories. "A Woman Sobbing" is, like "The Stepford Wives" and "Rosemary's Baby" before it, a horror story about the quiet desperation of a housewife. Jane's sons are rowdy and demanding. Her husband seems much more concerned with his advertising job, dismissive of her concerns. They discuss "Gaslight," the husband trying to convince his wife that it wasn't a play but a film. Their sex life is so regimented that Frank can recall the exact day and hour of the last time they made love. He doesn't stray but does look at his secretary's ass and listens with envy to a coworker describing a pretty young thing on the train. Inga the nanny is an unwanted intrusion for Jane, a visitor from a sexually liberated land that does nothing but make her feel inadequate. All the men Jane seeks solace from do nothing. The gas line worker tells an uncomfortable joke about his own sexual potency, the priest claims that exorcism simply aren't done anymore, and the shrink scribbles obvious observations in his notepad.
In other words, the supernatural terror at the heart of "A Woman Sobbing" is clearly a subtextual manifestation of the unhappiness Jane feels, born of the circumstances of a world that dismisses or disposes of women. All throughout the hour, the threat of being shipped off to a mental hospital hangs over Jane's head. Nobody once considers that what she is hearing might be real. Not even Inga, the only other woman in the household. So maybe Jane is crazy. Maybe the voice beckoning to her is the call of the void, the sickness in her own mind taunting her into embracing non-existence. The final scene, however, is a brief epilogue that suggests she is the victim of a curse. That a malevolent force targets the mothers of the house. "A Woman Sobbing" keeps the details about its haunting vague. We never learn the history of the house. A rope or cord Jane finds in the walls of the attic is the only clue uncovered about what could've birthed this supernatural presence. That all we know about this ghostly force is that it's a woman, it's crying, and wants to trap Jane in its cycle of madness and death is more than enough to make it a frightening manifestation of the loneliness, isolation, and frustration the protagonist feels. This means that the social concerns “A Woman Sobbing” handles are baked into a traditional horror story, about how evil sometimes randomly targets people.
In this regard, “Dead of Night” is chillingly effective. There is something about the way British genre television of this era was shot and edited that is especially suitable for horror. There's little music here, which means you really hear the ghostly sounds when they arise. The camera angles favor close-ups on the actors within smaller sets, furthering a sense of claustrophobia. The acting has a pointed, ice cold quality that makes every line hit noticeably hard. Anna Massey gives a fine performance as Jane, a desperate woman at the end of her rope. It all builds to a bluntly chilling climax, these moments of horror being presented with an almost documentary-like matter-of-factness. “A Woman Sobbing” is not quite as unsettling as “The Exorcism.” Its characters are thornier, its pace slower, and its social commentary not as razor sharp. However, it still left me with the same chilled, disquieted feeling as that episode. In other words, I need those remaining four episodes to resurface in some form. I need all of this shit that I can get. [8/10]
The Addams Family: Gomez the Reluctant Lover
“The Addams Family” very rarely centered episodes around Pugsley and “Gomez the Reluctant Lover” isn't about him either. He is, however, the impetus for the plot at least. Gomez and Morticia's eldest child has a case of the melancholies because he's developed a crush on his French teacher, Miss Dunbar. Her son's love-sickness concerns Morticia and she decides to re-read the love letters Gomez wrote to her way back when. She quickly decides these are inappropriate for her young son to send to a teacher but Pugsley gives one to Miss Dunbar anyway. The principal is concerned by a child writing such passionate words to a teacher and suggests Dunbar have a talk with Pugsley's parents. She visits the Addams' home and, when Gomez admits he wrote those words, Dunbar admits she was moved by his words, the first time any man has said something like that to her. Upon telling his wife of the situation, Morticia decides it would be cruel to simply tell the teacher no and instructs her husband to play along with a bit. There's a little misunderstanding and Morticia soon becomes concerned that Gomez is genuinely leaving her for Pugsley's teacher.
Disguised under the pretense of the Addams simply being eccentric, this show continued to sneak kinky and alternative lifestyles into sixties family's living rooms. “Gomez the Reluctant Lover” starts with husband and wife enacting some dentist themed role play, Gomez enjoying getting his teeth drilled. Later, Morticia walks in on another woman throwing herself at Gomez. She does not seemed distressed by this and, instead, suggest he humor the other woman... As long as Gomez stops as soon as Morticia says so. See, I knew these two were swingers! Things only start to go wrong because Morticia gives Fester the duty of transporting the safe word to Gomez' ears. This results in a very funny last third, devoted to one of my favorite comedic tropes: The conversation with two meanings. Morticia is genuinely upset, Gomez thinks she's just acting and assumes her cries of distress are cues to take it further. Of course, it all goes off the rails the minute his beloved wife speaks some French, Gomez literally pulled towards her. Unlike the last two episodes, this plays off the couple's established dynamic in a way that's funny but doesn't betray the trust they share.
Atop that amusing set-up, “Gomez the Reluctant Lover” has some strong physical gags in it. When Fester spies Gomez and Miss Dunbar getting close, he immediately slides back up the fire pole. See, that's the kind of stupid cartoon logic that makes me chuckle. The same is true of the moment when Morticia fishes out one of Gomez' old love letters and the contents are so hot that the parchment is in ashes. The reaction on Carolyn Jones' face when attempting to read one of Gomez' old love letters to her son is priceless. There's also an extremely silly gag about what the painting she is working on is. It probably says a lot about my taste in women that I also found Jones, when throwing things and being upset near the end, to be even more attractive than usual. On that note, I don't think Jill Andre as Miss Dunbar is hideous by any means. The episode ends on the note that, the minute her glasses off, a man is able to find her attractive. As a guy who grew up with a crush on Lisa Loeb, I consider that venomous anti-girls-in-glasses propaganda. Anyway, this is probably one of the funnier season two “Addams Family” episodes I've seen so far. [710]












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