RECENT WATCHES: 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)

Following the surprise success of “The Fast and the Furious,” it was evident that Universal had a new franchise on their hands. It was also extremely evident what fans of the first film wanted. Vin Diesel was the break-out star of the original and audiences were eager to see him zooming around in shiny cars once again. Diesel – either showing some long-term savvy or a superstar ego that would quickly become infamous – declined to return, focusing instead on the “xXx” and “Riddick” series. Producer Neal H. Moritz was not deterred and chose to continue the “Fast” saga with Paul Walker's Brian character instead. Given the instantly meme-able title of “2 Fast 2 Furious,” the sequel would attract a surprisingly high-profile director. Academy Award nominee John Singleton was apparently a fan of the first movie and was eager to direct part two.

Following the fall-out of the first film, O'Connor is no longer a cop. Now, he's a professional street racer in Miami. After getting busted following a race, Brian is reeled back in by the FBI. He's talked into going undercover as a driver for drug lord Carter Verone. Brian invites his former best friend, Roman Pearce, into accompanying him on this mission. Pearce doesn't trust Brian anymore, blaming his once buddy for sending him to prison. The promise of clemency lures in both men, who soon discover how dangerous Verone is. The two men attempt to take down the villain with the help of a local super-mechanic and the sexy undercover agent already embedded with him. 

It goes without saying that, on his worst day, John Singleton was a better director than Rob Cohen. He mimics some of Cohen's questionable choices from the first movie here. There's one CGI dive into the bowels of a car's engine and several shots of people pressing the Nos button and making "Wow!" faces. The story still pauses for a totally gratuitous montage of girls in bikinis. The film begins with a hilariously goofy moment, of the Universal logo turning into a spinning rim. Otherwise, Singleton displays much more confident, visually stronger filmmaking. The editing is quick-paced but coherent. The action scenes are smoothly organized. In many obvious ways, "2 Fast 2 Furious" is an improvement over the first film. 

However, the sequel is not superior to the original in at least one important way, perhaps the only facet that actually matters in this franchise: The car stunts simply aren't as good. Oh, there's a few decent peel-outs and swerves. The practical effects highlight of the movie is definitely when a muscle car gets dragged under the wheels of a trailer and pancaked. Singleton certainly goes out of his way to include as much car porn as possible, lovingly displaying the shiny chrome bodies and suped-up interiors of all the star vehicles. 

Unfortunately, the sequel relies on digital effects far more than the first "Furious." That is its downfall, as the CGI cars look like utter shit. The opening race climaxes with Brian and his rivals boosting their cars over a draw bridge, leading to a truly cartoonish shot of computer-generated cars sailing through the air. This is matched by some ghastly compositing work during the "Dukes of Hazard" inspired finale. There are several shots of the stars awkwardly blue-screened into digital cars that would've looked more at home in a PlayStation 2 game. I know this series eventually becomes, and essentially always has been, live action cartoons. The ostensibly grounded mood of this one, however, is really spoiled by such visually unappealing effects work. 

Without the thrill of real cars smashing into shit and daring stunt driving, what can "2 Fast 2 Furious" offer? The script is still extremely derivative. Brian and Rome's smart-assed rivals-turned-best-buds arc has played out in roughly a hundred other buddy cop movies. It's extremely obvious when the bad guy will uncover the heroes' deception, leaving the audience to wait until the clichés snap into place. I do think "2 Fast 2 Furious" is somewhat better written than the first. The supporting cast and various subplots – including campy roles for Ludacris and Devon Aoki – are utilized better than the first film's. Having an actual villain this time, played by an amusingly hammy Cole Hauser, also improved the flow of the story considerably. The scene where he threatens a dirty cop with a hungry rat and a hot bucket is probably the only moment that caught me off-guard. 

The script here is still strictly of the C+ variety, goofy and uninspired in ways that are rarely charming. Which, once again, leaves the homoerotic posturing of the bro-tastic heroes the primary redeeming quality. Brian and Roman's history often plays like lovers that have fallen out. Roman seems to have an obsession with threading to beat Brian's ass, which suggests a fixation. Later, he says that Brian's weakness for pretty females gets him in trouble, as if to implied he'd be better off with another option. There's a hilarious moment where he whips his shirt off, Tyrese's pecs glistening in the Miami sun, for totally gratuitous reasons. I don't know if Tyrese Gibson is in-on-the-joke but his conceited tough guy performance is funny nevertheless. Paul Walker – who heavily seasons his dialogue with "bros" and "bruhs" – is looser than in the first film, leaning into the ditzy blonde appeal he showed last time. Unsurprisingly, Brian and Roman walk off together at the story's end, all-but-confirming the simmering subtext between them. 

If you combined the decent vehicular stunt of the first "Furious" with the forgettable but competent script of "2 Fast," you'd probably have a mildly diverting popcorn flick. The kind of thing you'd watch on a lazy Sunday afternoon, chuckling mindlessly at the doofiest parts. With those atrocious CGI car effects instead, it's difficult for me to recommend this one. Paul Walker and Tyrese's bro-mance only provides so much value to a collection of reheated action clichés like this. [5/10]