RECENT WATCHES: Fast X (2023)

I came to the "Fast & Furious" franchise late. My best friend and former podcast co-host JD has been trying to get me into the series for years. I, however, couldn't get pass the car-bro sensibilities of the first few entries. I'm also too much of an obsessive-compulsive nerd to simply jump in at the fourth or fifth movie. The looming release of "Fast X" – supposedly the beginning of the end for the saga of Dom Torreto and his family – was the push I needed to finally indulge in this particular franchise. Over the course of a week, I raced through the previous ten movies before heading to the theaters to see "Fast X." Admittedly, I went from a "Fast" skeptic to a full-on convert by the end. While most seem to consider "Fast X" the latest disappointing installment in a series running on fumes, I'll admit I had a good time with it. Maybe Vin was right. Maybe movies like this, of such overwhelming bombast and absurdity, are best enjoyed on a big screen with a packed audience. 

Once again, Dom and his wife Letty are living in peace with their son, Little B. Once again, the mysterious Agency they've been aligned with for the last few films wants to recruit them. This time, it's to retrieve an experimental microchip traveling through Italy. Roman decides to lead the rest of the "Fast" family on this mission, Dom staying behind. That's when an injured Cipher appears at his home. She warns him that a sadistic new villain has appeared: Dante Reyes, the psychotic son of "Fast Five's" Hernan Reyes, is determined not only to destroy Dom and his family but to make sure they suffer as well. There is no microchip and the mission in Italy is a scheme by Dante. Dom and Letty try to rescue the others from Dante's plot but it goes awry. Soon, everyone is on the run from the Agency or Dante's murderous rage. 

I've commented before that the last two "Fast" movies have started to feel a bit muddled in their plotting, with so many characters running around in pursuit of increasingly unimportant MacGuffins. "Fast X" finds a perhaps inelegant solution to this problem. It essentially isolates parts of its cast to four independent storylines for most of its runtime. Dom heads to Rio, in pursuit of Dante, hoping to spare more innocents from his wicked plot. Roman, Han, Tej, and Ramsey are on-the-run from authorities through Europe, after being framed by Dante for a terrorist attack in Italy. Letty gets captured and thrown in an underground techno prison with Cipher, the former enemies forced to forge an alliance if they hope to escape. Meanwhile, Jakob Torreto rescues Little B from Dante's thugs, leading the two on a road trip across America together. Running through all these stories are appearances from two new characters, in the form of Brie Larson and Alan Ritchson as opposing members of the Agency. 

We can only speculate on why the movie is structured like this. The fact that nobody wants to work with Vin Diesel anymore might be a factor. So might Justin Lin leaving the production early on, to be replaced by graduate of the Luc Besson school of action, Louis Leterrier. Whatever the reason, I actually found this split to work fairly well. Dom's story line is by far the grimmest, with Dante playing cruel head games by endangering innocent bystander. This segment is also the heaviest on the series' trademark car stunts, featuring a brief return to its street racing roots. Letty and Cipher's prison escape movie has its own joys. Michelle Rodriguez and Charlize Theron's mutual grizzled charisma play off each other nicely. The absurdity of the techno prison setting, with its spider robots and massive air vents, amused me. As did the convoluted planning the two characters have to think up in order to escape. 

Meanwhile, the other halves of the movie are goofier than ever. Roman's gang head into a hacker shop, leading to a cameo from everyone's favorite sunken-eyed comedy star/gossip mill whipping boy. There are comedic beats here involving Han eating a pot muffin and Tyrese tossing talcum powder into the air that are totally inexplicable. Honestly, the more surreal humor blends nicely with a series that has gone so totally off the rails. The last movie that comprises "Fast X," revolving around Jakob and Brian's road trip, feels like a nineties kids movie/action flick mash-up. John Cena might as well be playing a totally different character, the fun uncle Jakob has become resembling part nine's conniving super villain not at all. Yet Cena's goofball charm seals the deal for me. By the time the former pro-wrestling superstar is driving a homemade war wagon down the freeway, launching rockets at his enemies, I really did feel like I was watching a big budget leftover from the "Suburban Commando/Double Trouble" era of action cinema. 

If the muscled-up charms of its cast are the main thing that holds "Fast X" together, this is most true of its antagonist. The "Fast" franchise didn't start getting memorable bad guys until the sixth film and Jason Momoa as Dante Reyes easily tops them all. Momoa is exactly the kind of beefy superstar you'd expect to show up in these movies. However, Momoa made the utterly inspired decision not to play Dante as a roided-up tough guy... But as a preening peacock, a camp-gay supervillain who parades through the movie in a series of gaudy outfits. Momoa is clearly having the time of his life, gloriously hamming it up as a bad guy who relishes his own fabulousness. The character's flamboyance blends well with his sadism, allowing the ridiculous excess of his evil plan to be much more easily swallowed. The over-the-top queerness of the character is an implicit threat to the hyper-macho main characters, while also allowing the series to slyly indulge in its barely bubbling-under-the-surface homoeroticism more than ever. Momoa's The Joker by way of Rip Taylor performance enlivens the entire movie and makes it substantially more entertaining than it would've been otherwise. 

Which isn't to say that the movie's main attraction – its gravity defying action scenes – aren't thoroughly amusingly in their preposterousness. The first proper action scene involves Vin and the gang chasing a giant, flaming, neutron bomb through the streets of Rome. The climatic bridge shoot-out from part five is revived, this time with Vin doing far more superhuman acts. I really can't undersell how much I enjoyed the war wagon scene with Cena as well. There's some good fisticuffs too. Cipher's escape from Dante's ambush being the first time Charlize Theron's action chops have really had a chance to shine in this series. Brie Larson, dressed as Hillary Clinton in spiky punk heels, even gets a notable action scene to herself. The climax features Dom's iconic Charger diving out of an airplane and outrunning a massive fireball. Maybe it's not as fresh as any of the chaos from "Fast Five" or six but I'm not gonna lie. I enjoyed it. 

"Fast X" is definitely very self-aware of its status as an event blockbuster, the "Infinity Wars" of this franchise. It packs its extensive runtime with multiple high-profile cameos, and to further the "Infinity Wars" comparison, ends on a downbeat cliffhanger. While you can argue about the film's merits all you want, I guess I got wrapped up in its big, doofy charms. Whether that's largely thanks to Momoa's expert hamming or just me suddenly having a fondness for this ridiculous franchise, I suppose that's for others to figure out. I'd personally would put this above the last few installments and am absolutely on the hook for "Fast X-2" or "FUR11OUS" or whatever they call it. [7/10]