You would think, following an obvious breakthrough like “Monster,” Patty Jenkins' career would take off. She was attached to a few projects that never got off the ground, like a Chuck Yeager biopic and a Ryan Gosling vehicle called “I Am Superman.” When these follow-ups failed to materialize, Jenkins would spend most of the next decade working in television. This is, presumably, how she became attached to “Five.” A project done for the Lifetime Network, the film collected together five shorts directed by women, centered around the theme of breast cancer. Jenkins would join Penelope Spheeris along with three big name celebs – Demi Moore, Jennifer Anisotn, Alicia Keyes – on the anthology feature.
The film begins with “Charlotte,” directed by Moore. Set against the backdrop of the Moon Landing, the segment centers around Pearl, a head-strong little girl. Her extended family has gathered at the home, ostensibly to watch the moon landing but also to say good-bye to the girl's sickly mother. The truth is being hidden from Pearl. She doesn't understand what is happening. All she knows is she can't see her mom and that a lot of strange people are in the house. This fact is quickly frustrating the willful young girl.
By assuming the perspective of a child, “Charlotte” does a good job of capturing the different effects cancer has on people. Her father withdraws totally and can't even bring himself to say the words “breast cancer.” Helen, Pearl's acerbic grandmother played by a well-cast Annie Potts, wants to write about the topic and fight the taboo. Others treat Charlotte like she's already dead, a cousin stealing her jewelry and the priest referring to her in the past tense. The general perception of the time is that cancer is something a child shouldn't know about, representing a wider cultural disinterest in discussing the subject.
The second segment is “Mia,” directed by Jennifer Aniston. The short runs in reverse chronological order. It begins with a fully recovered Mia re-marrying, continuing back to when she met the man who would become her next husband. Back further to the day she learned her cancer went into remission. Then back to when she threw an early funeral for herself, which she used as an opportunity to burn all bridges. We then go even further back, during the worst days of treatment when her first husband walked out, and finally concluding with the day she got the bad news.
“Mia” has a clever premise, beginning its cancer story with the idea that some people do live through it, that it's not always the end for everyone. Yet, sadly, the script proves equal parts mawkish and ingenuine in its humor. The dialogue is frequently obvious and awkward. The comical set-up, of Mia wanting to experience her own funeral, feels contrived. As does the way she proceeds to reveal secrets and call out shitty friends in that moment. It's all a little too-on-the-nose. Similarly, her reaction to learning she has likely fatal cancer is to fixate on the minor details of her life. It's supposed to be touching, and it could've been with a more graceful approach, but it becomes overdone here. Aniston's direction is similarly sentimental.
“Five's” third segment is “Cheyenne,” from Penelope Sphreeis. Cheyenne is an exotic dancer. Through her work she meets Tommy, a meat-headed mob enforcer. The two soon fall in love. During some foreplay, Tommy discovers a lump on Cheyenne's right breast. Soon she discovers that she has breast cancer and will require a double mastectomy. The two have to grapple with the effect this will have on her career, their relationship, as well as the ways Cheyenne and Tommy perceive themselves.
“Cheyenne” begins in a really interesting place. Too often in our society, women are valued only for their physical appearance, their sex appeal. Quite literally, some people only love women for their tits. Loosing that threatens Cheyenne's whole life, her professional life, her love life, her personal life. Sadly, “Cheyenne” continues the schmaltzy streak that ran through “Five's” previous segment. The dialogue is overdone. The conversations Cheyenne and Tommy have in the doctor office's lobby addresses the short's themes too bluntly. The scene where Tommy has an emotional breakdown, and then receives a pep talk from the gambler he harasses, is ridiculously obvious. Also, isn't it weird that “Five” pauses to focus on how breast cancer affects... Men?
The fourth installment, “Lili,” is directed by Alicia Keyes. Lili is a successful businesswoman. Her sister is a working-class mom. Her mother is a melodrama attention seeker, who always finds a way to make every conversation about herself. The three meet for lunch, where Lili plans to tell her mom she has a cancerous lump that will be removed the next day. Instead, her sister breaks the news. Mom and Sis follow her to the waiting room the next day, embarrassing Lili and making her more uncomfortable as they continue to force themselves into what she hoped would be a quick, private affair.
Of the various stars-turned-director in “Five,” Alicia Keyes makes the best impression. She even has a strong visual sense, as displayed in Lili's walk into the operating room. “Lili” is a madcap comedy, greatly needed after the bathetic last few stories. There's a number of amusing comedic episodes here. Such as the way Lili's mom immediately goes off on a tirade about their late father. Or an encounter with a man in the breast cancer office, played by a typically deadpan Jeffrey Tambor. The way Lili's mom immediately decks herself out in pink, literally the day after learning about her daughter's diagnosis, could even be a sly commentary on the exploitative commercialization of the disease. Much of “Lili's” humor arises from something most of us are familiar with: That one person in the family who uses any opportunity to guilt, or shame, or make the situation about themselves.
“Five” comes full circle with its final segment, the one directed by Jenkins. “Pearl,” the little girl from the first segment, has grown up to be a breast cancer specialist. In fact, she's appeared in every segment, as the doctor delivering the good or bad news to each patient. As an adult woman, Pearl learns that, like her mother, she has breast cancer. She still struggles with the scars of her mother's death, especially with how her father kept the truth from her. Now, as a mother herself, she faces the same decision with her own daughter.
“Pearl” has one moment in it that I really like. After her father continues to be evasive after forty years, Pearl comes home. She has a talk with her husband about an unimportant factor of her everyday life. She then attempts to break the news to her little daughter, who is preoccupied with a cartoon she's watching. This is a hard truth: We want to be honest with our kids but sometimes they really aren't ready for the truth. Pearl fights through the fear and frustration she feels in that moment, because her parental love is greater than both of those things. This is, sadly, the stand-out scene in a segment that otherwise continues “Five's” maudlin approach. Pearl's second scene with her daughter features too much phony sounding dialogue. Her conflict with her dad does not feel lived-in or natural. By skipping over much of Pearl's cancer ordeal, the final scene is less emotional than it could have been.
“Five” was heavily promoted by Lifetime, premiering on October 11, 2011 to high ratings. It was nominated, and even won, a number of minor industry awards, suggesting it was well received. The network even created a sequel of sorts. “Call Me Crazy: A Five Film” took a similar women-directed, anthology approach to the topic of mental illness. (The subtitle suggested Lifetime wanted to turn the “Five” format into an ongoing series but no further installments have been made.) While I really wanted to like “Five,” it simply can't overcome the limitations of its medium. The Lifetime Network's original films carry with them a certain reputation, not always earned, but “Five” is as exactly as sappy and awkward as I feared it would be, save for Keyes' segment. [Grade: C+]
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